an Oh Myyy Property
News

Woman Left Fuming After Getting Slut-Shamed By Urgent Care Nurse Practitioner During STD Check

Tetra Images/Getty Images, deleted account/Reddit

A woman recently took to Reddit to seek advice after a humiliating experience at an urgent care clinic.


The Redditor, whose account has since been deleted, wrote into the subReddit "AmItheA$$hole" to seek out advice on whether or not she should contact HR after an incident with a nurse practitioner.

Read her full account below.

The tl/dr version is that the 21-year-old woman participated in her first one-night stand.

She explained that she had never participated in a meaningless hook up before.

"My previous sexual partners have all been someone I have developed deep connections with in some kind of way."

She went on to explain to readers that despite using a condom she experienced some potentially STD-like symptoms. For the sake of caution, she went to an urgent care clinic to be examined and tested.

During her visit, she was extremely open with her nurse practitioner about number of sexual partners, etc. so that she could receive the best care possible.

However, as she was leaving the nurse practitioner stopped her and went on to slut shame her.

"You're 21 years old, you really need to guard and protect your character."

The nurse practitioner, also female, went on to say:

"Well you know, guys get to have sex all they want and nothing bad comes out of it for them but you know us as women we can't be doing that as much because we have to protect our character."

She did not stop there.

"You're going to want to have kids one day, and the way you're living your life now could really hurt you and your chances of having a kid with a good man."

The original poster went on to ask readers for advice on whether or not she should contact HR after the nurse practitioner's outrageous behavior.

While the since-deleted Reddit user did suffer further slut-shaming and abuse on her thread, most people were infuriated by her experience.

"NTA. 150% report her to HR. Do it right now. This is rude, regressive, none of her business and could actually deter women from getting care. You'll be doing yourself and every other woman who walks through those doors a kindness." - inevitablegirlie
"Agreed, this is insane. My wife is a doctor and would be appalled to hear if a colleague did this. There is never supposed to be judgement in medicine, because exactly as you said, it could cause patients to be less open in the future. They are not the police, or the morality police. They treat you, they're there to make you better. Sure, they may recommend to stay away from unsafe practices such as unprotected sex, but it's not supposed to be judgement. Just medically relevant information and best practices. This was ABSOLUTELY judgement, and bullshit. OP please report her! I guarantee she's done this to other women, and I guarantee some of them have thought twice about seeking treatment in the future because of it. It should be stopped" - Excolo_Veritas
"Nurse here. What she was doing was not okay. We all take paths to take care of our patients ethically and treat them with care. We might recommend to use a condom but as you stated you were doing that. If you were my patient I would actually applauded you for having safe sex and still coming in just to make sure. It's not okay to push your morals on someone else. Report the fuck out of her. NTA" - dancer29
"NTA. Definitely report that. She is there to help you medically, not try to force her values on you." - SirPengy
"NTA AT ALL
Her job is to provide health care, not moral judgement. I won't go into how dated and f***ed her comments are - but bringing her own personal beliefs into it are out of line. Eta: even if she had told you the exact opposite and been like 'yes girl! Go f*** all the men!' Her bringing HER opinion into the matter makes it not ok. You were there for a swab. Her job starts and stops with the test." - kai7yak
"NTA. I'm a nurse and I would report the s**t out of this woman if she treated me or worked with me. In our line of work, we definitely have to ask probing questions or make recommendations that some people see as intrusive, but only if there's a legitimate medical reason, which we explain--e.g. 'I don't care whether or not you do cocaine, I'm not going to call the cops on you, but please tell me if there's cocaine in your system because giving you a beta blocker with cocaine in your system could kill you.' Recommending safe sexual behaviors like consistent condom use and frequent STI testing FOR YOUR HEALTH and the health of your partners would have been totally appropriate. Lecturing you about the effect casual sex will have on your 'character' is a hundred miles over the line." - GrouchyYoung
"This isn't 1950 and she's a stranger. You're an adult and can obviously handle yourself. She isn't in charge of your chastity belt keys and this was incredibly out of line. I'd definitely report her as that wasn't her place." - xmarketladyx
"Totally report her. You didn't come for a sermon, you came to get your health evaluated." - Gonebabythoughts
"Nta, healthcare providers are supposed to treat without judgement and that was incredibly unprofessional" - edibble1987
"I am a Nurse Practitioner. Please report this clinician. Her approach was inappropriate and unprofessional. She reminds me of an NP I knew who was also a nun.
I would understand if she wanted to have a frank talk about protection, risks, etc., at the close of the visit, but your 'character' is none of her dang business." - wadingin3

According to edits on the original post, she decided to reach out the clinic's manager.

She explained that she did not want the NP to lose her job, but rather wanted some sort of discussion to be instigated regarding patient treatment.

If you want to know your rights as a patient in the United States, the book The Rights of Patients: The Authoritative ACLU Guide to the Rights of Patients is available here.

Knowing your or a loved one's rights is essential, especially for patients with chronic illness.

We're all self-conscious about something, and it doesn't help when our faults get thrown in our faces. You don't want doctors hinting that something is "weird down there," nor do you want someone to tell you you're balding. WE KNOW.

Keep reading... Show less
Fox News, @hewster1369/Twitter

A guest on Fox News is being roasted online after his unusual description of how one would get high on marijuana.

Keep reading... Show less

Hmmmm, I don't think THAT'S your essay....

Keep reading... Show less

When you know your kids backwards and forwards, this is the best tool in your arsenal.

Getting our kids to listen to us is not always the easiest of tasks. They're willful and stubborn, but we've got a mighty weapon they are rarely prepared for: reverse psychology. Getting them to convince themselves to want to do something against their own initial intentions takes some work and a whole lot of creativity, but a little sneaky manipulation goes a long way. Here are some clever parents' tricks that are definitely worth taking notes on.

Redditor u/LeanderD Asks:

Parents of reddit, what's your best example of reversed psychology on your kids that actually worked?

He Floated His Idea Through A Back Channel

Giphy

Wanted to name my boat. Anything I would think of was dismissed as stupid by my 13 year old son. After deciding on a name, I confided to a male friend my son liked. Made my friend suggest the name as though it was his idea. My son thought the name was perfect. Done.

calypsodweller

We Always Want What We Can't Have

One of my best friends through childhood used to be punished with no salad if she misbehaved. She cherishes salad now and would always try to eat as much as possible during school lunch. Coincidentally, her now husband used to be punished with no books, it had the same effect. I think it's hilarious that they'd be hitting the salad bar and library like some black market their narc parents couldn't reach hahaha.

cookiearthquake

A Deceit That's A Cut Above The Rest

Giphy

Don't know if this counts, but, at my high school (private, boys only) in the 1960's, they made a big deal about how long your hair was, and would occasionally order a boy to go home and "get a haircut".

I thought it was stupid, until years later, a master confided to me at a reunion that the policy was deliberate. The school figured we'd spend so much energy rebelling about hair length, that we would ignore other aspects of teenage rebellion. (Not?) Surprisingly, they were mostly right.

FrankDrakman

Damn! That's smart. Wow.

fangxx456

Oh they don't like long hair?

I'll show them. I'll grow my hair out as lon- what?! No I don't want to go "party"? I gotta try out this horse shampoo.

DankeyKang11

The Forbidden Book

Hi I was a victim,

There was a forbidden book that I was not allow to read on the shelf. My parents said I could only read it if I behave myself.

It was summer holidays and I was playing games all day (after 6 hrs of summer homework). One day I was home alone and had the opportunity to grabbed it. I read like half of it in one go. It was 5000 years of Chinese history.

Safe to say I was bamboozled.

oddstodd

Flowers Of The Queen

My parents always told me my broccoli were the flowers of the queen and that I really shouldn't eat them, or else the queen would get very upset! I, of course, ate the whole broccoli in a few seconds.

Subwoofy

I'm telling the queen and she's gonna be pissed

draculacletus

Sleeping Beauty

Giphy

I taught my kids when they were toddlers that no amount of yelling, shaking or hitting can wake a sleeping adult. The only thing that works is a gentle hug and/or a nice kiss on the cheek.

Edit: Probably needed some more details for the reverse psychology aspect to be clear. It went something like this - Step one, tell the kids I'm going to sleep and nothing they do will wake me (head buried face down is the safest position). Step two, after the initial onslaught dies down pretend to awaken on your own. Tell them you got a bit of nap left in you and nothing can wake you, especially not hugs and kisses.

DrMethusael

Holy sh*t...if my daughter woke me up like this I would buy her a pony.

All-Seeing_Elon

I am saving this comment because this will save lives if I ever have kids, stg.

smerter

A Walk In Someone Else's Shoes.

Split custody with my ex. When my son was around 10, he visited two weekends a month. I was waiting tables and didn't have a huge amount to spend, but he was so needy from divorce (and I'm not blaming him, it was ugly), he begged constantly for MORE when he was with me. Whatever more was, it didn't matter... he'd be eating ice cream cone and begging for teriyaki.

I finally realized that he just felt empty, and getting MORE whatever from me wasn't filling him up. His next visit I handed him $100 in cash and told him it was our food/fun budget for 3 days and two nights, and he was in charge of it. I bought him his own wallet to carry. We figured out how many times we were going to eat and what we were going to do, and he paid. He got to keep whatever money he had left...thought he was rich...then realized just how much everything cost. Well. Shoe on other foot then. If we had no money for food, we ate leftovers - and I didn't contribute more to pot. After a few weekends of running short or not getting something he actually wanted because he was foolish with funds, he started to really think about how to spend that money. He budgeted and kept to his budget. And a few times he actually went home with a little cash for his private stash.

Many years later, he thanked me for this. It really changed the way he thought about money and love.

Augumenti

This Is Worth Giving A Shot

Took my 3 year old son to one of those doctor's visits where he was going to get a shot. He was worried about the shot on the whole drive over, almost to the point of tears. We get to the doctor's office and a nurse subtly lets me know that my son is not just scheduled for 1 shot, but 5 of them in the same visit.

I turn to my son with an exaggerated smile and tell him, "Good news! They figured out how to take that one big shot you were going to get and instead break it up into these 5 little tiny shots so it won't hurt nearly as much!"

You could see the relief wash over his face. He stopped squirming and relaxed completely. He took the first shot and even smiled and said "It's true! The small ones don't hurt!"

We actually made it through the third shot before the effect wore off and reality kicked in. Still... I counted it as a victory.

blackbird77

Put This To The Taste

Giphy

My mom would tell me she only lets me eat soup after candy and she'd only buy me candy that i didn't like. After a few times, i stopped trying and begged her to let me eat soup first. She gave me a smirk and told me go ahead. This doesn't sound as evil as it was. But trust me i suffered.

turkeypr0

So what was the candy?

Poster_Main

Mint chocolate, raisins, stuff like that. I still hate them to this day. Who the f--- thought while eating chocolate "hmm id like some tooth paste with this."

turkeypr0

This is Truckin' Awesome

Mum had sworn a bit around the house.

When 4, while out at the supermarket, I said F word really loudly.

Very quickly and intently, she asked if I had just said "Truck" and said that was a bad word and not to ever say Truck like that again.

I thought that was the bad word so used that when being naughty.

GodOfTheThunder

The "Silly Mom" Routine

The "Silly Mom" routine.

My kid, and a few other kids I've known, would balk at getting ready to go. I'd grab their clothes and say, "Well, if you won't put on your clothes, I guess I'll put on your clothes. Cute shirt, by the way! Does it go on my foot?"

NO!

"Does it go on my head?"

NO! IT GOES ON ME!

"Oh, that's right, thanks! So, it must go on your legs, right?"

NO!

"I just can't figure this out! Where does this adorable shirt go?"

[kid grabs shirt and puts it on] ON MY TUMMY! SILLY MOM!

"Oh, thank you so much! Now what about these pants? Shirts go on tummies, so...the pants go on the tummy, too, right?"

NO!

[continue until kids have dressed themselves]

I would also do things like hand the kid my keys and say, "Alright, you're driving, I'll sit in the booster seat in back," attempt to feed the kid by putting a spoon up to his ear or his belly button, and attempt to put away his toys in the refrigerator.

insertcaffeine

Some Foot For Thought.

Giphy

My mum would always yell at us "if you don't do X, you have to go to bed without socks!"

I never wore socks anyway, and I'm ashamed to admit that this worked.

Splittsky

That would work really well on my son, or make him cry for a really long time... He's 3 and over the last few weeks has decided that he is fully unable to sleep without socks on.

PJQueen

Toddlers man. Completely unpredictable.

SheaRVA

I'm Greens With Envy

My mum had a friend that would put vegetables on her own plate and not the kids.

When the kids asked she would be reluctant to share, "that's grown up food. But I suppose I can let you have a little."

Her kids grew up loving vegetables.

I sat at the dinner table for 3 hours staring at the yucky cauliflower I refused to eat.

laik72

This reminds me of an instance when my child convinced my wife and myself to change our plans for dinner. We were in a grocery store to pick up something quick and easy to eat that we wouldn't have to prepare. Our daughter, wanted none of that, she demanded that she wanted a salad from the salad bar. We started to argue back, but then realized: "Our child demands that we feed her vegetables for dinner instead of a microwaved meal, why are we saying 'No?'"

We had salad for dinner that night.

Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

The Power Of Choice

I don't so much know if you would call it reverse psychology, but I didn't realize it until my dad told me this.

When there were chores that needed doing, he noticed if he asked me to mow the lawn, I would complain and procrastinate. But if he asked would I rather mow the lawn or wash the windows, I'd pick one and just get it done.

Shattered my brain when he told me when I was in my twenties. I use it when I'm coaching or baby sitting all the time and it almost never fails.

AppealToReason16

The Boy Who Cried 'Ouch'

Giphy

I've done this one with tens of kids. Any time a kid gets "hurt" (falls down on grass, gets gently hit in the face with a ball, etc.) instead of stopping the activity to pick the kid up and see if they're ok you just scoot them off to the side and resume. Within 10 seconds of not getting all the attention and seeing the fun is resuming they pop right back up and are magically healed.

This of course is only for the "injuries" that aren't actually injuries.

pedanticProgramer

Kelly Sullivan/Getty Images

The internet has been dominated this week with talk of Sony and Disney splitting over their agreement to have Spider-man in Marvel's Cinematic Universe.

After Deadline reported that negotiations had broken down in the contract renewal, everyone has had hot takes on the situation.

Keep reading... Show less

Reddit user cuddlethrowawayy found himself in an awkward situation recently when his in-laws and wife chastised him for cuddling with his 15-year-old daughter while the family watched a movie.

On the famous subreddit "Am I The A**hole?" he told the entire story in a viral post entitled "AITA for telling my wife and in-laws to f*** off after they told me to stop cuddling my daughter?

Keep reading... Show less