Most of us will at one point or another quit a job suddenly or be let go. We may have a better opportunity, or we may be leaving because of low pay, a toxic environment, or a terrible boss.
But one woman added a new reason to the list for what makes a boss terrible on the "Am I the A**hole?" (AITA) subReddit.
Redditor Iquitscrewyou shared on the sub how her boss addressed her when she attempted to put in her two week's notice.
The Original Poster (OP) asked the sub:
"AITA for walking out after a boss tried to refuse to accept my resignation?"
The OP did not hold back on the insults when she described her boss.
"I had a boss who was a real turd."
"He labored under the delusion he was an excellent boss and couldn't put together that his behavior and the crappy pay was why he had such a hard time keeping employees."
The boss was also sexist, in his phrasing and workplace actions.
"He also thought it was acceptable to call his female employees hun, sweetie, and sugar."
"He was a condescending a**wipe who consistently passed over more qualified women for promotions in favor of promoting less qualified men."
"I had to stay until I could find a better job because I enjoy eating, and couldn't afford to leave unless I had something else. I got an interview with a competitor who hired me on making more than I made with him."
When she was ready to quit, the OP's boss did not react in the way she expected.
"I turned in my two weeks and he said 'oh sweetie, you know you can't leave.'"
"I said, 'I absolutely am leaving."'
"He got the smuggest look on his face and said 'Well, I'm not accepting this, sugar. Guess you're here to stay.'"
The OP did not appreciate that response.
"I got so furious and decided that was it. I said, 'well screw this then, I quit. Effective immediately.'"
"Called my new job, explained what happened in front of him as he sat there slack jawed and agreed start the next day. I packed my stuff and left."
The OP's former coworkers, new boss, and boyfriend were divided on how they felt the OP reacted.
"A former coworker said it was an a**hole thing for me to just up and quit on the spot, but if he refused to accept the resignation he could easily have tried to screw me over when my last day did come."
"My new boss says he deserved it and I'm not the a**hole for quitting like I did."
"My boyfriend says he can see how other employees might feel like I was an a**hole by making them cover my absence, but sees how I'm not the asshole for walking out of that toxic environment."
"So just because I'm curious, I thought I'd ask here. AITA?"
Fellow Redditors wrote in on the sub, rating the OP's reaction on the following scale:
- NTA: Not the A**hole
- YTA: You're the A**hole
- ESH: Everybody Sucks Here
- NAH: No A**holes Here
Some confirmed the OP was not in the wrong, and the former boss's behavior was unacceptable.
"NTA. The way your former boss responded to your giving notice made my skin crawl. You were right not to accept his condescension and harassment. Go enjoy your new, better job." - sonnenshine
"How do you decline a resignation though?"
"They're leaving, you kidnap them and make them work?" - dreamsdo_cometrue
"NTA. 2 weeks notice is a courtesy that your former boss did not deserve." - SparklyUnicornLady
Some also pointed out providing two-weeks notice is not a requirement.
"Yeah, you're basically never the a**hole for quitting a job. Notice is nice to do, if they've been decent to you, but otherwise it's typically not required (obviously check local laws)."
"You never owe your job anything more than the work you were hired to do. If you resign or quit, end of transaction. You owe them nothing more." - Dracarys_Aspo
"'At-will' employment works both ways. They can let you go with no warning, and you can just up and leave, too." - b33r_engineer
"Yes, and worth noting that 2 weeks notice is just a courtesy. Regardless of whether boss was an a**hole or not, it's by no means a requirement."
"Think of it like this: do you want to use this person as a reference? Would you consider coming back to work for this employer again in the future? 2 weeks notice! Otherwise, f**k 'em. Quit when you want." - breachgnome
Others agreed and said the OP should report the boss for his language alone.
"My question is why was there no harassment lawsuit? Pretty sure using such words as 'sweetie' is now grounds for one?" - szu
"Is there an HR department at you old job? I'd report his behavior in a heartbeat." - Flurb4
Some disagreed, saying it wasn't worth the trouble. The OP walking out was for the best.
"It is so hard to get a lawyer to take a sexual harassment case in some places. In my state it is d**n near impossible."
"Myself and 5 other coworkers were all trying to go together to do a sexual harassment lawsuit at one of my old jobs. We had tons of recordings and videos (legal in my state) as well as a police report. No lawyer would take it. This was in a large city and we called d**n near every lawyer."
"No one would take it and this was a case with hard evidence and far worse things than just being called pet names or just verbal advances. When 6 women together with tons of video and recorded evidence and police involvement couldn't get a lawyer to even try the case, it shows how f**ked the system is in some states."
"We were trying for lawyers for a few months before we finally all up and quit. We were originally trying to get other jobs lined up first, but it got so unsafe." - iwritepapersformoney
"Lawsuits are a giant pain in the a** to deal with, so often aggrieved parties will suck it up and/or move on. Plus, suing your current employer for a Title VII violation makes for an unpleasant workplace (although the law does prohibit retaliation, I'm sure you can imagine why they doesn't always work out in practice.)" - TeamSandersHRE
"I love when people say this like it's just easy to stand up to these creeps. Like women aren't vilified every single day for standing up against sexual harassment and abuse. Usually saying anything leads to an insurmountable amount of drama. I don't blame her for cutting ties and leaving. Too many victim blaming jerks on this planet for it even to be worth the stress." - brittneyCPa
It's a difficult enough situation when you feel the need to leave your job, but it must be much harder if your boss or someone else higher up refuses to work with you. Based on the new boss' reaction, it seems the OP is in a much better position now.