People Break Down The Stupidest Reasons An Ex Broke Up With Them

When you know your relationship is headed south and there's no chance it'll improve, the next logical step is breaking up.

However, the feeling is not always mutual, and the person ready to give up has emotionally moved on.

So, how do they gently break it to the other person they're no longer interested in staying together?

That depends. They either spare them a harsh truth by lying or give them a full-scale reality check. Either way, it never bodes well for the other person.

Curious to hear the way some people were broken up with, Redditor Justacutiepieeiepiee asked:

"Whats the stupidest reason your ex broke up with you for?"

The audacity of some of these people is mind-boggling.

Party Pooper

"I had emergency surgery and after a week of recovery, she said I was being a 'bummer' and she wanted more fun in her life and dumped me on my birthday. My bad my gallbladder exploded?"

– NeighborhoodDude84

"Similar thing happened to me. I had just had a major abdominal surgery and ex bf complained we 'didn't do anything anymore.' like b*tch you live on the 3rd floor of a walkup and I came over at YOUR REQUEST so unless you're gonna carry me I am staying right here on the couch. get dumped idiot"

– notronbro

Inasive Research

"She went through my phone and saw that I was flirting with someone...........5 years before we started dating."

– Kanguin

"A guy at my work had a girl break up with him because she saw in his Facebook photos that he had been on a 'romantic holiday getaway' the year prior but he had told her he hadn’t been in a relationship for 4 years."

“Why are you lying to me! I saw the photos! Who is she?!”

“Uhhh did you see a girl in those photos?”

“No. I assumed she was taking the photos”

“I went on a holiday with my friend from work. The Asian guy in the photos”

“…..”

– EMI326

This Works For Some Couples

"He said that all we did was cook meals and watch movies. It was the middle of winter and peak covid lockdowns."

– Own-Emergency2166

"Me and my wife are happy af and that’s all we do lol."

– safetyfirst5

"Right? My husband and I are home bodies and are either playing video games or watching movies together, as long as our rent and bills are paid, we are happy just loafing around together, and we are ok with it!"

– Expensive_Rub_4332

Loyal To A Fault

"My first girlfriend and I dated for almost a year, I thought things were great. She breaks up with me through AIM (yes I'm old) which pretty much wrecked me. I had legit feelings for her and I didn't understand what happened."

"Turns out she broke up with me because her best friend broke up with her boyfriend. I'm thinking she thought she would get to spend more time with her. Her best friend found a new boyfriend a month later. Guess who wanted to get back together?"

"I shut that sh*t down. I had just started to get over it all so I told her I wasn't interested."

– burnmenowz

"The same thing happened to a buddy of mine when I was in the Marines, except they were married."

"He was good friends with the another Marine in my unit from when they were both stationed in PR. They had met and married absolutely gorgeous PR girls while there. The girls had been best friends since they were toddlers and were nearly inseparable."

"One of the Marines had a bad drinking problem, and a baby, and wasn't taking care of his family properly. His wife told him to stop drinking or she was leaving him. He did for a while, but it didnt last."

"She made good on her promise, took the kid, and left him. Her best friend decided to leave her husband to help her friend with the baby. Needless to say that guy was gobsmacked."

"Everything had been good for them up to that point, or so he thought. He was locked on, had his sh*t together, was an excellent partner, and his wife admitted he was a great husband."

"His future looked really bright. He was getting out soon, already had college lined up, and then was going to law school. His father was a multi-millionaire attorney and real estate developer. He was going to work for his dad."

"None of that mattered to his wife. She said her friend was more important to her than her marriage. He offered to take care of both of them, his dad was more than willing to take care of them financially, but they refused."

– Marine_0311

More face-palming scenarios were shared.

Pot Calling The Kettle

"My first boyfriend came over and dumped me on my front porch. He said he didn't like my lisp."

"He also had a lisp."

– radiantrose19

Too Much Pressure

"Because she was supposed to also get a job when we got a place together because i was not going to be able to support us alone, and after 3 months of living together, she hadn't even tried to, and I put some pressure on her."

– HalfSoul30

Going Nowhere Fast

"Because I refused to get my nails done every few weeks and wouldn't buy a new car. I have an old, but very reliable and functional car that's paid off and has no issues. Apparently it gave him the ick."

– NotUrAverageAvo

"I have a working condition 13’ Nissan Altima but my ex fought with me all the time because she wanted to be 'picked up in a nice Audi' purely because I could afford a nicer car. Broke up for something else but good riddance."

– deadx-

Movie Betrayal

"On a whim, I went to see a movie with my mom and sisters — a movie that he apparently also wanted to see."

"I said that it was a good movie and I’d be more than happy to see it again. He said 'that’s not the point' and dumped me right then and there — after three years together."

– anannanne

Sometimes, it's a blessing in disguise and a bullet dodged.

Pro Liar

"She when to a 'medium', and this person told her that I cheated on her with her friend. I didn't. Told her that. Friend told her that... Nothing."

"There was nothing going on between me and her friend. Indeed, the only couple of times I've been on the same place as this friend, was in the presence of my ex! I didn't flirt with her, I didn't stare at her... I had zero interest on her."

"Even if I was single, and if she had jumped on me, I would have said no. But it was impossible to prove that nothing happened. My ex argument was: 'how would the medium know if it weren't the truth?' "

"First I was sad, but then I got happy and thankful to this anonymous 'medium'. Their powers help me doge a bullet."

– veybi

Narcissistic Behavior

"He said he wasn't over his ex (the same girl that cheated on him), then when I got a new boyfriend, he tried to gaslight me into thinking my new guy wouldn't be good enough for me. Apparently, I'm his 'biggest regret'. He's an extreme narcissist. I'm thriving since we broke up."

– LightWing07

So Superficial

"He was super into Amy from Evanescence, who was the complete opposite kind of look than what I had at the time. My best friend died her hair black and he called me and said he couldn’t stop thinking about her and how she looked kind of like Evanescence chick."

"He said he just couldn’t be with me and needed to pursue things with her so he broke up with me. Spoiler, she was not into him at all, nor would date a friend’s ex. Guess that didn’t bring you to life did it, d*ck?"

– LLBenBen

Carb Monitor

"Not me, but a friend's boyfriend broke up with her, said it was because she ate too much pasta... she's fit, and he owns an Italian restaurant..."

– Rowka

Sloughing Off The Guilt

"We'd been dating officially for a month or so, and one day she woke up in my bed, kissed me goodbye to go to work, and then after her shift called to break up with me."

"She said a customer flirted with her, and that she flirted back, but then remembered that she was dating someone, and felt bad about it. And her reasoning for breaking up with me was, 'I just don't want to have to feel bad about flirting with someone.' "

– TomPalmer1979

Mister Misogyny

"I was not 'submissive enough.' We were both Christian at the time, and he was a controlling d*ck. It was about over anyway, but he decided to pull the old ''you're a woman, so you should be doing what I want' at the breakup"

"Examples include deciding for me that if I ever got pregnant, I would carry it to term and then give it up for adoption, I should wear particular shoes and clothing to cater to his kinks or else it would be my fault if he wanted other women, and he even picked out what he wanted to be my wedding dress in a style I hated."

"This came hard and fast, and we didn't last long, but me having any kind of opposition to these things in his mind was 'not submitting to his will as my future husband.' "

"Anyway, I've deconverted now and have a great life with people who love me as me, and he's knocking around Pittsburgh, divorced on grounds of abuse from the next lady and single as hell."

– Free-Government5162

The disrespectful way a person breaks up with you is very telling. They ultimately reveal their true colors and show they didn't deserve you.

And while the heartbreak is understandably rough, clarity manifests later in the form of a much better suitor.

Hey, you gotta kiss a few toads, right?