Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

People Couldn't Help But Notice The NSFW Shape Of Jeff Bezos' Rocket During His Space Flight

People Couldn't Help But Notice The NSFW Shape Of Jeff Bezos' Rocket During His Space Flight
Joe Raedle/Getty Images

It's been a banner couple of weeks for eccentric billionaires obsessed with space travel. Just days after Virgin Galactic founder Richard Branson's launch into space, Amazon founder and richest man on Earth Jeff Bezos just completed a space flight himself.

But Bezos and Branson share one other thing in common. Just as Branson's flight was upstaged on the internet by a photo he took in front of some wildly ugly cabinets, Bezos's has been eclipsed by something even more ridiculous: the undeniable fact that his space ship looks like a giant wang.


Does that sound like nothing more than the sophomoric ramblings of a bunch of internet jerks to you? Well sorry, you're wrong. See for yourself below, at the 1:43:00 mark.

youtu.be

There is no way around it, that is a dick. It has a glans, for God's sake. Did nobody notice this in the design phase?

Given that the ship was at least partly funded by Bezos crushing labor unions and submitting his employees to highly lucrative but often abusive working standards, some might say the shape of his ship is sort of fitting. Perhaps it was a design choice!

Anyway, Bezos finally achieved his dream of space flight this morning, along with his brother Mark and 82-year-old former test pilot Wally Funk, who joined him on his rocket called Blue Balls--er, sorry, Blue Origin, the penis-shaped rocket is called Blue Origin.

After soaring 250,000 feet above El Paso, Texas to the edge of space, Bezos and his pals then descended back to the desert in just 10 minutes, which seems a fittingly anti-climactic, some might even say premature, duration, if you know what we mean. But for Bezos, the short duration didn't dull the shine of what he called his "Best day ever."

Good for him! All Twitter cared about, however, was that he went to orbit in a giant space dong.











Bezos's dick rocket cost about $5.5 billion dollars to build and launch, which is enough to give all 1.13 million Amazon employees--4,000 of whom are on food stamps--a check for more than $4,867.25 and still leave Bezos the richest person on Earth by about a $50 billion margin. Very cool!

More from Trending

Amanda Seyfried
Christopher Polk/2026GG/Penske Media via Getty Images

Amanda Seyfried's Unbothered Reaction To Losing At Golden Globes Is Seriously Iconic

Now that the Golden Globes have passed, it's time for that most cherished awards-season tradition: deconstructing stars' reactions to losing!

And this year, the award for Best Reaction to Losing inarguably goes to Amanda Seyfriend, who's gone viral for her hilarious response.

Keep ReadingShow less
Kyle Rittenhouse
@rittenhouse2a/X

Kyle Rittenhouse Dragged After Making Outrageous Claim About Fluoride In Water

In another bid to get back into the good graces of MAGA Republican President Donald Trump's fans, gun rights poster boy Kyle Rittenhouse claimed fluoride in drinking water is "making people gay."

Rittenhouse fell out of favor with the MAGAsphere in 2024 for criticizing their Dear Leader on his 2nd Amendment stance. After deleting the critical X post which spawned rumors among Trump's MAGA minions that he was secretly transgender, Rittenhouse stayed off social media until December 2025 when he announced he was married.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots of Jake Tapper and Kristi Noem
CNN

Kristi Noem Slammed For Her Smug Reaction To ICE Agent Calling Renee Good A 'F—king B*tch'

Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem was criticized for her disturbing reaction to a question from CNN host Jake Tapper about a video of an ICE agent calling Renee Nicole Good a "f**king b*tch" after fatally shooting her in the face.

The ICE agent who shot Good has been identified as Jonathan E. Ross, according to court records that closely align with the circumstances of a June 2025 incident in Bloomington, Minnesota, referenced by Noem and Vice President JD Vance.

Keep ReadingShow less
Donald Trump
Alex Wong/Getty Images

Trump Blasted After Declaring Himself ‘Acting President Of Venezuela’ In Mock Wikipedia Entry

President Donald Trump is facing criticism after he shared a mock Wikipedia entry that features a picture of himself with the new title of "Acting President of Venezuela." This comes little more than a week after his administration invaded the South American country and ousted its dictator Nicolás Maduro.

Trump previously claimed the U.S. will take a day-to-day role governing Venezuela after removing Maduro, an act of regime change widely viewed as an act of war that came without congressional approval and violated international law.

Keep ReadingShow less
A fox yawning in a field
photo of yawning fox on grass

People Describe The Most Boring Thing They've Ever Experienced

No two people share exactly the same interests.

With this in mind, every now and again we might find ourselves needing to attend something that a friend or family member is extremely excited about, but we find excruciatingly boring.

Keep ReadingShow less