"Hey baby, you wanna see how many commas are in my bank account?" sounds like a bad pick-up line from an old Looney Toons cartoon, not a real life scenario--but the absolute parade of surprises that is men as a whole made it a reality in an unbelievably video shared to Reddit's "Cringetopia."
The video shows the man approaching a woman at a bar, showing her a sizable bank account balance. It really does not go well for him.
Using his Wells Fargo account to pick up girlsyoutu.be
The woman said, "You really think think that's going to impress me?"
The man awkwardly defends and gets standoffish about his choice over the course of the video, repeating that the money "should" impress her.
Everybody who saw the video on Reddit cringed.
WildAnt3968 said this was definitely an ego trip:
"This feels like he just got a personal injury settlement payout and thinks 'I'm rich now bitches.' Everything about this screams 'sudden cash' for a person who's usually financially unstable."
Gina_the_Alien was taken aback by how cringe it truly was:
"This is the best example of cringe I've seen in a long, long time."
NoiceStyle thought he was going in a different direction:
"You guys don't get it. He's showing us a tutorial on how not to get laid."
Meanwhile, Slabb84 theorized another approach:
"Can I interest you guys in my 34k portfolio and $18.56 checking account?"
"Money doesn't f*cking impress me," said the woman, more emphatically, in order to get the man away from her, to which he replies that the woman has "lost in life."
The video has spread past Reddit and into Twitter, where people are equally annoyed at the man's pick-up tactics:
The audacity of the man in the video to unsolicited approach somebody and just straight up show them his bank account was shocking to many users, as was the comparatively small balance of just over $92,000 he had.
"It's probably not enough to convince someone who isn't interested in you to give you a chance (especially since it's such a douchey move)," IAmPandaRock wrote.
"I mean, maybe if it said something like $350,000,000, the woman might think 'damn, he's such a douche but that's a ton of money… I guess I can see where this goes in the very near term… maybe we can go Paris for lunch!'"
Needless to say, it looks like the banker ended up without a date despite his best efforts.