My schools weren't perfect. We had bullies and fights broke out often, but nobody ever pulled out a knife or a gun. And all of our teachers and students survived. Well most, the one's that didn't, succumb to natural causes. How do we get back there?

Eyes Closed

"Kid streaked (fully naked) across campus, hiding his face using a condom. He passed out about a minute into the run."

- TippsAttack

DOA

"My classmates dad had a heart attack at graduation and died. He was just yelling at his wife and keeled over."

- jimijesus69

"A similar thing happened at my girlfriends graduation. It was a hit packed gym And all of a sudden in the middle of the ceremony people start moving away from a spot in the bleachers near me, turns out one of the graduating student's aunt was having a heart attack. She lived though because literally every first responder was there (small town 1500 people 80 in graduating class) and the fire station was a block away."

- jserpette95

Awful People

"There was a girl in my school who was being bullied and basically chased into the busy street in front of the school. She got hit by a few cars. The next morning people were making fun of the situation because her shoes flew off after she was hit. My school was filled with a**holes."

"Edit: She did end up dying. I think she may have died on impact. But the memory is fuzzy. She didn't die in the hospital that I know for sure."

- keepingthingseevee

For Cred?

"At one of the schools I went to, some kid stabbed a disabled kid to get into a gang."

- Danoodlepod

"And I'm sure that "street cred" will buy him a lot of ramen when he's sitting in prison for the next few decades."

- NeonDisease

Fake Out

"We had somebody plant fake bombs and call in a bomb threat at the high school so the police would all be focused at the high school. Was really just a distraction for a double homicide/suicide across town."

- GodlySpaghetti

Oh see there, that's all a bit much. School is stressful enough already. Our class clowns only exhibited foolish behavior, like spitballs, fake bombs? We've lost control...

In the heart

"A teacher went to break up a fight, and she got stabbed in the chest. Teachers were not allowed to break up fights after that. She survived but she quit teaching."

- moniker2therescue

Alarms...

"The seniors planned their senior prank to have a bunch of alarm clocks go off in lockers all over the school throughout the day. The idea was that by the time one locker was unlocked to turn off the alarm another would be going off. Unfortunately for the seniors, the day they planned this happened to be the same day Obama was campaigning at the fair grounds less than a mile away. The alarm clocks got mistaken as bomb threats and just about every senior in the school was questioned by either police or teachers. Basically it was just a huge misunderstanding that lead to a whole bunch of crap."

- An_apples_a**hole

Assassins...

"Someone tried to assassinate the physics teacher. Our high school was 3 stories. The math and science rooms were on the 3rd floor. During parent-teacher interviews someone turned on all the natural gas taps in his classroom and left a lit candle on the floor."

"The idea being that since natural gas rises. It would fill the room and explode when it touched the candle. Teacher found it only a few minutes after the would be assassin left the room and was able to put out the candle. They never figured out who did it, to the best of my knowledge."

- Reddit

My Brother's Ex

"My brother dated a girl briefly in 8th grade who later snapped in high school. She had convinced a group of 5 other people to commit to a plan to weld the high school doors shut and burn people with a home made flamethrower and shoot people."

"The morning of the planned day someone was tipped off and the cops called. The school went on lockdown for 6-7 hours and they found the girl's parents taped up and stabbed a crazy number of times in their closet of their home. This was 3 years after my brother dated her."

- JoeZMar

Idiot

"Nothing as brutal as some of the other storied but about half way through the day once a guy was spotted walking across our sports field with a rifle, Everyone was kept in classes for about an hour? Turns out it was some idiot looking for the nearby shooting range and accidentally stumbled onto school grounds."

- mr_biggus_dckus

Clearly, we need therapists and guards in school around the clock. And a grief counselor for life would probably do everyone a world of good.