It's been said that men are afraid women will laugh at them and that women are afraid that men will kill them. That should tell you a lot about the power imbalance between men and women and how frightened women can get doing things men might take for granted, like simply saying "no."
After Redditor AllWhammyNoMorals asked the online community, "Women of Reddit, what was your worst run-in with a creep?" women shared their stories.
"When I was 12..."
When I was 12 and just starting to develop, a guy told me 'your titties are coming along nicely.' I was so freaked out!
Sadly, this is common and by the time they're adults, many women report experiences with sexual harrassment that go back years.
"She handed us our bags..."
My friend and I were 16 and wandering around at a Sephora in the mall, just swatching eyeshadow and highlighter on our wrists. He was the only guy in the store, and I only vaguely noticed him in the same aisle as us just before we paid. It didn't ring any alarm bells for me whatsoever, because why should it? We picked up our highlighter and went to pay, the girl at the register rung up our items, leaned over, and said quietly, "That guy followed you two into the store and has been watching you in each aisle. I'm going to give you your bags and go ask him if he needs any help, you two need to get as far away as possible. If you see him follow you outside of this store, go talk to security." She handed us our bags, gestured at the door, and walked up to him as we ran out.
I hope she gets all the good things in this life.
"There was a guy in my hometown..."
There was a guy in my hometown that would wait outside the high school, with the door to his corvette open, hoping a girl would get in. I lived in the middle of nowhere. To get to my house I had to walk over a mile, on a one-lane dirt road, winding through a forest. One day as the school bus was approaching my laneway to drop me off, the corvette guy was waiting in my laneway, with his door open. The bus driver wouldn't let me off the bus; he continued to the next drop and told me to go to that house and call my parents to pick me up. (This was in the days before cell phones existed.)
"I'm a bartender..."
I, unfortunately, have a few stories but this is one that tops the list. I'm a bartender and one night I was serving three men who work at an Italian restaurant nearby. I was offered a job, which I politely declined. They were my last patrons. I closed out their tab, finished my side work, and had a busboy walk me to my car. As the busboy left in his own car, this black Porsche SUV blocks me in my spot. The window is rolled down and I realize it's the owner of the Italian restaurant. He asks if I want to go home with him. I decline.
He asks if the busboy was my boyfriend and I lied and said yes. He scoffed and sped off. I hurry and leave to head home. As I pull into my parking spot at my house, I see the same SUV drive by! I woke up my neighbor who was a military guy, and he said he'd keep an eye out. That night I found the guy's name online, his Facebook profile, his business profile, his wife's profile, and his phone number. I took screenshots and sent them all to him telling him not to harass me or I'll retaliate. I never heard from him again. Lesson learned: always pay attention to your surroundings while driving home.
"In fifth grade..."
In fifth grade, after ballet practice, I was only wearing shorts and a jacket over my dance clothes (leotard and tights), and standing in a chipotle line. Some old dude was behind me and asking me about my phone. According to my mother, he was looking at my body, scanning it up and down. Even before I found that out he gave me the creeps. When we left, he rushed to pick up his order and ran out the door after us and followed us home. He stopped following at the last turn. I had trouble sleeping.
"Over the next couple of years..."
The most memorable was when I was sitting in my parents' front garden, on the swing, reading. The way everything is laid out with the trees and whatnot, you can barely see the swing/deck/BBQ area from any perspective that's not from the front door. Very private spot.
Anyway, I was just sitting there reading when I hear someone walking up. Assume it's a family member because how would it not be? Someone plops down on the swing next to me, throws an arm around me and it's just ... some guy. Says some stuff, tries to move closer, and proceeds to attempt to keep me from leaving when I get up.
I got of there, practically sprint back to the house, and tell my dad what just happened and that there's some a-hole in our garden being completely gross at me. He just laughs and says, "Oh, that's just [new across the street neighbor]. Be nice."
The f***?
Over the next couple years, he would go on to make me and my older, only occasionally visiting, sisters super uncomfortable any chance he got. Long stories. And his poor, but large and angry dog was always loose in the neighborhood and murdering other people's pets.
"He revved his engine..."
Was walking down the sidewalk and a guy whistled at me from his car, I ignored him and kept walking. He revved his engine loudly and ran his car up on the sidewalk, missing me by a couple of feet. I was 12.
A friend of mine had a similar experience. She was barely fourteen at the time and says she has been scared walking down that street since.
"A guy who stays regularly..."
A guy who stays regularly at the hotel I work in; all of the female staff knows to avoid getting caught alone with him.
He has a habit of asking us if we know of any "adult fun" nearby. If you just act like you don't know what he's talking about he'll say he wants to go to brothels and have a good time without his wife. He'll then progress to offering you various amounts of money for the night and asking you what you like in bed and what you'd be willing to do. He developed such an obsession with one of our staff before she left that security would walk around with her when he stayed because he'd followed her out to her car at one point making suggestive comments.
Got stuck alone with him once as I was behind the counter and he stood blocking the only way out from behind it. He started the usual chat and I told him I wasn't interested. He then moved on to asking me what time I finished, if I lived nearby if I walked home alone. My male coworker turned up then but he creeped on me from a distance the rest of the day and watched me leave. I have no doubt he will assault someone one day, hotel won't ban him because he regularly spends money.
"I was 21..."
I was 21 in a strange city and got separated from my friend at a bar. I was drunk and wanted to go back to the hotel so as I'm leaving, this guy who had been sitting near me all night followed and got IN MY CAB with me and closed the door.
Again, I was very drunk so had to think quickly and stay as calm as possible. He tried to talk to me and I just nodded and made small talk (I didn't know if rejection would turn him violent so I played along the best I could) after telling the driver where to take me.
The whole time this guy is moving closer and touching me, so as soon as the car stopped I got out, RAN into the hotel lobby where I knew this man would be following me, and screamed to the hotel security and desk employees, "I DO NOT KNOW THIS MAN. HE IS FOLLOWING ME," and they took it from there.
"I told him..."
Weird Larry lived in my dorm. He unsuccessfully hit on all the girls, which is why he was Weird Larry. It totally ruined his self-esteem.
One night, Larry just showed up and invited himself into my room. I was not fully clothed. He took this as an invitation and climbed up into my bunk bed. I asked him to get down, and he asked me to come up there with him so we could have sex.
When I refused, he took some quarters out of his pocket, put them on my nightstand, and said, "What if I paid you? You could do your laundry!"
I told him that wasn't enough change to do a full load of laundry, and he started crying and getting snot all over my pillow.
I had to go wake up the RD (person in charge of the dorm) and have him escorted out. Then he wouldn't stop sending me messages. I saved the messages and used them to file a restraining order. A few other girls wanted in on it, so Weird Larry was evicted from his own dormitory and had to drop out of school.
Here's a sobering fact:
In 2018, an online survey conducted by a nonprofit called Stop Street Harassment found that 81 percent of women and 43 percent of men had experienced some form of sexual harassment during their lifetime. That's a much higher number than previous polls, so that should give you an idea of how widespread the issue is.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below.
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