You know, I'll just be real for a sec: I hate annoying kids in movies. They drive me crazy.
I am reminded, first and foremost, of Marriage Story, which received a bunch of nominations for awards a couple of seasons ago. It wasn't even Noah Baumbach's best, by the way, despite being lauded as his most personal, fully realized project.
A big factor that brought the film down: The annoying damn kid. The kid that appeared to have been spawned by Satan himself and is probably single-handedly responsible for the breakup of the marriage depicted in the film, though no one in the film bothers to admit it.
If there's an annoying kid, I rarely suffer through the film. What makes it worse is that these kids never act like humans, because screenwriters either make kids really brilliant prodigies with the vocabulary of some top scientist or egregiously infantile. There is no in between.
But there's much more than annoying kids that can ruin a movie. People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor lawyeratyourservice asked the online community,
"What ruins a movie instantly?"
"Not answering questions..."
"Not answering questions with yes or no. So many movie plots could be cleared in 10 minutes."
SirZooalot
Right? It's maddening.
In reality, if someone says, "I can explain," then the overwhelming majority of people will give them the opportunity to explain.
It's insulting to the audience.
"Having an idiot sidekick..."
"Having an idiot sidekick constantly asking questions about what you’re doing. I know the sidekick is a stand in for the audience."
Blazerblaster
They are, and this is an example of lazy screenwriting. Garners an instant eyeroll from me.
"Even if..."
"Even if it's a one vs multiple people fight and they could have easily overhelmed the one person together, they always take turns/do it one on one. What's up with that?"
sunflower4
How sweet of them! They're so kind, just waiting for their fellow henchmen to die before they have a go at our hero themselves!
"When a trailer..."
"When the trailer reveals the entire story."
Prams35
This is precisely why I hate trailers and don't bother with them. THE WORST.
"An exposition..."
"An exposition in which one character explains everything that's going on to another character that should already know what is going on."
smartypants
LAZY SCREENWRITING 101: Tell us everything. Assume that the audience is stupid so create characters that are even more stupid.
It's offensive.
"People with lower middle class jkobs..."
"People with lower middle class jobs that live in a nice, large house in an upper-middle-class suburban neighborhood."
crucifix_peen
Yeah, what's up with that?
It's impossible to suspend disbelief at that point. Is Hollywood just out of touch?
"A house full of kids..."
"A house full of kids and the whole home is pristine. In real life, there's always going to be some toy or art project laying around and most likely damage to the furniture."
zerbey
Yeah, I bet actual parents are envious of all these movie families that somehow have it all together.
"When the characters..."
"When the characters experience the 'misunderstanding and break apart' trope. Then they 'come back together to resolve conflict.' I'm so sick of it, especially when the misunderstanding could easily be avoided in the moment if they just saw the simple solution staring at them in the face."
captnbass
Again, this drives me crazy. And it always follows the same beats, too. A lot of romantic comedies are like this, and that's what makes them bad romantic comedies.
"I get that the main characters have to survive..."
"Main characters being invincible while everyone else dies from one punch. I get that the main characters have to survive or they wouldn’t be main characters, but at least make the damage somewhat realistic."
roostertail47
It's always a pleasant surprise when screenwriters remember that our heroes are people too and have them suffer some damage.
When this is done in horror movies in particular, it really ups the stakes.
"I hate movies where..."
"I hate movies and TV shows where the world is ending and everyone's fighting for their lives, but the teen characters are still angry at their parents just for existing."
escargoisntfastfood
Even though the character is an adult, I can't help but think of Jenny from Deep Impact, who is still somehow mad at her father for divorcing her mother even though there is a literal comet about to hit the earth and wastes so much of the film pouting.
I love Deep Impact, by the way. I hate myself more than enough, thanks.
Something tells me a lot of screenwriters would benefit from spending time with regular people. Perhaps some of their success has gone to their heads.
A lot of movies would be much better if they didn't commit so many of these cinematic sins.
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
