In a welcome change from the current pandemic, the CDC turned its attention to a salmonella outbreak resulting from backyard poultry. This lead the CDC to issue a stern, yet strange warning—all poultry keepers should refrain, for the time-being, from snuggling their ducks and chickens.
43 states have now reported cases of salmonella caused by close contact with various fowl. One-third of all cases were found in children under 5, with North Carolina leading the pack, followed closely by Iowa.
Thankfully very few of the cases have been serious—only 34 out of 163 reported, with many unreported cases likely.
Of course, Fox News had to comment on this.
In a move reminiscent of their pandemic pundits, the poultry enthusiast mocked the CDC guidelines.
"I'm not a huge fan of [the CDC's guidelines] because I've been handling chickens since I was about 4 years old," Tiara Soleim, a former Bachelor contestant and self-described chicken enthusiast, said.
"And I've been kissing them, snuggling them, shoving my face in them and I'm fine. People around me are fine. And I don't see a problem with it."
Soleim also lauded her chickens' personalities, and claimed the CDC was "just looking for something else to control" by suggesting she not put her face into contact with contagious pathogens borne by her 30 birds.
"I gotta ask since you're an enthusiast and an expert. Someone once told me chickens are so dumb, if you face them in a corner they can't get out. Is that true?" asked Carlson.
"Whoever made that up has something against birds and it's not true at all...They know exactly what to do. Sometimes they get stuck in corners but for the most part, they can figure it out."
When you spend an entire portion of your day having a guest advocating for snuggling chickens, can you truly call yourself a news network?