Remember how terrible it was when a teacher would take something of yours? Well, some teachers have confiscated some truly weird items.
pants_on_fire_fire asked: Teachers, what's the most disturbing thing you've confiscated off a student?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
A middle schooler with a tattoo kit. What could go wrong?
GiphyI remember when I was in middle school, a fellow 8th graders dad was a tattoo artist. Somehow this kid had managed to bring his dads tattoo equipment to school and it was confiscated when he tried to tattoo another kid whilst his friends held this kid down. Petty sure it was going to be a forced tattoo but a teacher was walking by and heard the screams and stopped it.
Nobody needles this kind of drama.
Back in high school this girl brought a needle to school and was walking around the halls poking people with it. It was confiscated, obviously, they were able to determine that it had not been used by her to inject herself, or anyone else, with anything. They did have to go around and find everyone that had been poked though to make sure no one had any diseases.
Studying hard, I see.
GiphyOne of my students turned in an assignment on a flash drive with a bunch of porn on it.
No, it wasn't intentional.
The teacher being unfazed is the real story.
When I was in high school one of the percussionists in the lowest level band class was suspended for a couple days after a dead squirrel was confiscated from his book bag. He evidently was planning on putting it in the band teacher's desk. My band teacher thought it was funny but was otherwise generally unfazed by the news.
Don't bring a knife to school.
My crazy mom thought it would be cool to give me a coconut and a knife for lunch one day. I got in trouble for having a knife. Second grade. I was just hungry! She thought it would be a cool thing to bring to school.
Admit it - you respect tf out of this kid.
GiphyStudent had brought a puzzle to school, but the pieces didn't match. Turned out it was a single piece from all the puzzles WE kept at school, making every single one of them unsolvable.
Kids these days.
I was with a VP as we searched a girls bag and we found a burner phone, $3000 cash, and her black book of clients. She was 18 so not much we could do but man it made sh*t real when you consider she had a book with about 20 men's names in it.
Second weirdest was the kid who brought 3 fish he had caught that morning. He just wanted to kill them. Like didn't catch them for food, but just to kill them.
WTF?
My two female classmates had a nice idea to bring matches and rubbing alcohol to school in 8th grade. They had a plan to lure a bully girl to a secluded area outside the school, pour bottles of rubbing alcohol on her from a tree and light her on fire.
The only reason they got caught is because instead of leaving their backpacks in their classroom for an assembly, they brought them to the assembly room and some kid tried going through them to steal from them.
They didn't admit when caught but like 2-3 years later.
Edit: because of the replies, this was 2002, barely after columbine, they only got a 4 day suspension, in 08 I heard one was a meth addict, the other unknown, the girl who was gonna be lit, was still a bully to everyone after.
What else are condoms for anyway?
GiphyHad to take about a dozen condoms from a 3rd grader once. He was getting them from the older kids after school and playing with them. He had no idea how to use them, but he sure liked blowing them up like balloons
This didn't have a bad ending and I'm glad for it.
We once had a middle school kids bring a turtle to school. A teacher heard kids talking about it in the hallway. She alerted me, and sure enough... In his locker we found a red eared slider in a gym bag. I kept the turtle in my office and he took it home at the end of the day.
Nevermind, poor kitty.
A cat. One of my students bought his cat to school zipped up in his sports bag. Poor little thing.
If this isn't a mood...
GiphyMy mom was a teacher and she had to take a lighter away from a student after he lit his test on fire.
Prepared for anything.
Not a teacher, but when I was in 5th grade, our teacher tripped over a kid's backpack. She was like "whaddaya have in there, bricks!?"
And he really did have bricks in there.
Uhhh..
Not my story, but my psychology teacher used to work with underprivileged kids. One student, maybe 6-8 years old, really enjoyed his class and gave him a jar as a gift. What's in the jar? Jelly? Jam? No. The teacher noticed cuts all over the boy's arms and slowly puts the jar down. It was full of old/new blood. Completely filled.
He figures that the kid saw it as a part of him and probably saw it as something very symbolic and meaningful.
He says he was told when he started to never look up the kids he worked with because very few times is it a happy ending. The teacher's a great person, I imagine he just got a counselor and had an ambulance check the kid out and dispose of the jar. (The kids mother was also a drug addict.)
Yeah, there are lots of questions.
GiphyA cannonball. It was in their locker. I guess it's not really disturbing, but it is odd.
