Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Sarah Gailey Recounts Funny Date Between 'James Spader' & 'a Wolf'

Sarah Gailey Recounts Funny Date Between 'James Spader' & 'a Wolf'
Make us preferred on Google

Portland-based author treats herself to a fancy dinner and finds herself witness to the most bizarre date ever between a Wolf Girl and James Spader's doppelganger.

Hugo award finalist and novelist Sarah Gailey writes stores about murder and monsters, yet sometimes real life turns out to be stranger than fiction. This is exactly what happened when Gailey treated herself to duck at a fancy restaurant one evening, only to bear witness to a dinner date that we are still wrapping our heads around.


Note: This is a summary of Gailey's twitter-story. To read her full account unedited, go HERE.

Like a true narrator, she begins her story like so: "Who wants to hear the story of the date I witnessed between Wolf Girl and James Spader's Lonely Doppelganger? I HOPE IT'S YOU."

A man sits at an adjacent table who is the spitting image of James Spader. Sadly, he turns out not to be the esteemed actor of Stargate, The Practice, Boston Legal, and currently of The Blacklist. Gailey does a double-take before coming to this conclusion.

As she enjoys her delectable duck, the Not-James Spader constantly looks over at her as if he wants to say something. But Gailey's demeanor makes it clear that she wants to savor her meal in peace. Then things get really interesting: "Finally, a PERSON storms in and FLUMPS across from him. My overall impression is: BEDRAGGLED YOUTHSOME LADY."

Our narrator and witness to this strange encounter recounts the opening dialogue:

Not James Spader: You made it!

Bedraggled Young Lady: Yeah, sorry, I was at a rave and lost track of time.

NJS: [adjusts tie] Oh, uh, um, a rave? Like, uh, at a club?

BYL: Yeah, but it was like weird. Whatever

NJS: ...what's that you're wearing?

This is when our narrator reveals an important detail regarding the appearance of the Bedraggled Young Lady. That's right, she is wearing a wolf onesie.

Not James Spader doesn't seem all that surprised or put off.

Our narrator is feeling sorry for Not James Spader, but then Wolf Girl (formerly Bedraggled Young Lady) looks at the menu, and an even bigger plot twist unfolds. Wolf Girl complains that there is nothing good on the menu, aside from the pork.

Not James Spader gasps. "You eat pork?"

"I don't eat pork," he said with all the gravitas of a man in a suit on a date with a girl in a wolf onesie, "because pigs eat cats."

The rest of the story goes just as unexpected.

While pigs are omnivores, which means they eat both plants and animals (just like us), their general diet tends to be plant-based. So I'm afraid we have to call Not James Spader's statement about pigs mostly eating cats an alternative fact.

This is where the story ends, with Not James Spader and Wolf Girl (who turns out to be not old enough to legally drink) running off into the night in search of the weird and peculiar, perhaps at his ex-wife's bar no less, leaving us with one burning question on all of our minds:

"Do pigs really eat cats?"

We may never know. Or do we?

Please SHARE this with your friends and family.

More from Trending

Florence Pugh; sign for Cornell University; Josh Gad
Jason Mendez/Getty Images for Netflix; Matt Burkhartt/Getty Images; Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for Disney

Florence Pugh And Josh Gad Lead Celebrity Outrage After Cornell Frat Members Assigned Essays As Punishment For Sexual Assault

About a week ago, the story of the "Cornell 7" allegations broke publicly when a civil lawsuit was filed by a former Cornell University student known only as Jane Doe. The lawsuit detailed an October 2024 sexual assault at the Chi Phi fraternity house and Cornell University's handling of the assault after it was reported to school officials.

The public backlash against the seven rapists and four university officials named in the suit, as well as Cornell University, the Ivy League, and fraternities as a whole has been swift. Many people have shared their own experiences with institutions of higher learning and the mishandling of sexual assaults.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshot of Luanne James
WKRN News 2/YouTube

Heroic Tennessee Librarian Sues After Being Fired For Refusing To Hide LGBTQ+ Books From Kids

Luanne James, the former library director of Tennessee's Rutherford County, has filed a lawsuit against the county's library board after she was terminated for refusing to move LGBTQ+ books from the children's section to the adult section.

The board’s decision to move the roughly 100 children’s books to the adult section followed a statewide “age-appropriateness review” ordered the previous year by Tennessee Secretary of State Tre Hargett, a Republican.

Keep ReadingShow less
Donald Trump
Aaron Schwartz/Getty Images

Trump Hit With Blistering Factcheck After Making Patently False Claim About Prices Going 'Way Down'

President Donald Trump was swiftly fact-checked by CNN fact-checker Daniel Dale after he claimed to members of the press that "almost every price has come way down" following Joe Biden's presidency.

Earlier in the day, Trump bragged to reporters that the United States has the "best poverty," sparking immediate criticism. He continued to lie later, even as inflation remains above the level recorded when Biden left office, economic growth has slowed, and the cost of filling a gas tank has surged roughly 50% since the war against Iran began.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshot of Donald Trump in campaign ad
U.S. Government

Trump's Latest Government-Funded Campaign Ad Just Aired On National TV—And Critics Are Crying Foul

President Donald Trump and the White House are facing criticism after Fox aired a new taxpayer-funded campaign ad that was "paid for by the U.S. government" several times over the weekend.

The black-and-white ad uses slowed footage of Trump walking through a hallway, accompanied by his voiceover pledging that "this is the final battle." It ran during at least two of Fox’s Sunday NFL broadcasts, appearing during the Washington Commanders-Seattle Seahawks game and the Carolina Panthers-Cleveland Browns matchup, as well as on Fox News.

Keep ReadingShow less
Paulina Porizkova speaks candidly about aging and the expectations placed on women as they grow older.
@paulinaporizkov/Instagram

Paulina Porizkova Speaks Out About How Women Are 'Expected To Go Silent' As They Get Older In Powerful Video

Paulina Porizkova knows what it’s like to have all eyes on her. The supermodel rose to fame in the 1980s, but at 61, she’s speaking candidly about what happens when society stops looking at women the same way.

The Czech-born model became a fixture in fashion and beauty, from back-to-back Sports Illustrated Swimsuit covers in 1984 and 1985 and a longtime partnership with Estée Lauder to a stint behind the judges’ table on America’s Next Top Model.

Keep ReadingShow less