Finding out your significant other is keeping secrets from you is difficult.
A 26-year-old woman faced that when her 28-year-old husband received a text from his female friend. The 29-year-old friend's text made the woman question her relationship. So she turned to the Relationship Advice subReddit for help.
Redditor ThrowRAotherphone asked:
"My husband's [female] friend sent him a text saying 'look at your other phone ;)'… he doesn't have another phone."
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
"Yesterday my husband fell asleep on the couch with his phone on his chest. As he turned over the phone dropped."
"I went to pick it up to make sure he hadn't accidentally cracked the screen and the phone lit up with a text from his friend Amber which read 'look at your other phone ;)', there was also a second text which said 'goodnight xxx'."
"I put the phone back down on the ground because I didn't want him to know I had seen it."
"When he woke up, he was looking frantically for his phone and when I told him it fell, he looked relieved as soon as he picked it up."
"He started smiling when he replied to his messages. When we went to bed, I sat up all night waiting to see if he would take out this mysterious second phone, but he just went to sleep straight away and never woke up again in the night."
"Is there a reasonable explanation for this? Did she accidentally text the wrong person?"
"Do I confront my husband? Snoop? What the hell is going on?"
"So I looked everywhere for a second phone (house and car) and I couldn't find anything anywhere. My husband was in the shower so I checked his phone to make sure I saw the message correctly and it was gone."
"I'm really confused."
Redditors gave plenty advice about technology, like setting up a separate phone account online for use with your existing phone.
But the OP was looking for relationship advice, which some Redditors did provide.
"To be honest the friend is pretty stupid here. Why on earth would you do that?"
"Defeats the purpose of him having another phone. Cheaters are stupid." ~ papower77
"Unless she wants to break them up." ~ sadbabyblu
Someone with experience with investigating infidelity had some insight and questions for the OP.
"As a private investigator who deals with infidelity for a living. This is one of the biggest possible red flags."
"If I were you, I would remain as calm and natural as possible. Not letting him have any idea that you're aware of his shady behavior."
"He likely is using a texting app on his phone. That's a lot easier than going off and buying a second phone."
"But if he does have a second phone. It likely is in his vehicle like someone else suggested."
"How has his behavior been recently? Any changes?"
"Has he been showering you with gifts, starting fights, being secretive, etc?" ~ Daxman77
The OP answered:
"He's been starting fights constantly recently..."
Redditors advised the OP to look out for her health.
"If you have another chance to look at his phone, google how to see the hidden apps. If you find evidence for cheating, film the evidence and lawyer up first."
"Hope it looks way worse than it is, but better safe than sorry. Also, get an std test." ~ Katieenpo
"I wish I saw this suggested more often on these cheating posts. One of my biggest fears has always been my spouse cheating and giving me an STD." ~ lilbunnfoofoo
The OP did not provide an update, but Redditors were clear in their advice. She needed to ask her husband some serious questions.
