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People Share Their 'Why Am I Like This' Experience

We are not perfect. And that is ok. We have to embrace all that makes us unique; flaws are perfections through a different prism. We just have to learn to grow from our flaws. If our patterns are not serving us then we must severe the tie and start again. That is a task easier said than done though. Start slow. Day by day or minute by minute. Just try. But don't dwell on the setbacks. Shake it off.


Redditor u/jjapanackal wanted everyone to open up and discuss life by asking.... What is your, "heck, why am I like this" moment?


2020 en route....

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Everytime I think about my life and the fact that I have just reached the halfway point.

Having absolutely nothing good or interesting happening in my life at all.

But 2020 is coming maybe if I work hard on it something will change. emile44

I thought everyone was like this!?

Awhile back I was talking about how sometimes you just need to cry for no reason. Like if I haven't cried in awhile, when I take a shower, I'll purposefully cry because it's healthy. Said that out loud once and the people I was talking to understood me, but the people who overheard clearly didn't. I thought everyone was like this!? areana_mann

Procrastinations....

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When I have a 6 page essay due tomorrow morning, but I'm on reddit right now. It was a paper for my communications class, we needed to reflect on one of our relationships, and utilize a bunch of terms and theories from our textbook. kdane42

No one will know....

Whenever I sleep, I forget about everything and have to slowly remember everything over again during the first 2 hours every day. This is a secret I have never told anyone. I'm married and in my mid career. This has caused issues for many things in my life, as if there is something life threatening I may simply never remember after I fall asleep. If there is an important event I may just not sleep, or if I fall asleep at the event and wake up I have to make sure not to panic and focus on remembering the immediate important things first (like the presentation I have to give) then less immediately important things later. May sound crazy, but this is my daily life... no one would ever guess, nor will they ever know.Gods_Soldier_

In Polish....

Even though I'm Polish and I was born and raised here I'm terrible at Polish I always get crappy grades and I make a ton of grammar mistakes I even think in English because I can't formulate sentences in Polish. Im_homoshreksual

I get weird compulsions. ....

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I get weird compulsions. A lot. When I got a GBA a few years ago, I kept telling myself to take out the cartridge while I was playing. I also frequently get a feeling of something being wrong, when everything is fine. Normally just before I'm about to go to bed. Not paranoia, but "something is wrong about my room and I need to fix it before I can sleep." I really hate it. Mega_Septile

Needs Met....

I have depression and I don't know how to tell my parents "I wanna go to therapy." My parents are gonna be mad, but, I'm gonna tell that today, Wanna hear what happened after? YamnaLR

Undie Search. 

I just bought three new pair of underwear instead of doing laundry. Ffs, why am I like this? But to give myself credit I could have bought six pair for an extra dollar. zoltrinaforsure

Being Free...

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When I accidentally hurt other people's feelings. This was when I was in middle school and I rarely go out and socialize due to strict house rules so I didn't know how to act right, but at least I learned from my mistakes and strive to be a better person now that I have more freedom. han563478

Find Courage....

25yo M who has been living with my boyfriend for a year and a half. I'm in a relationship with zero sexual or emotional intimacy. We've been together for over 2 years and have still yet to have sex, despite me telling him on multiple occasions how important it is to me. Several friends and family members have told me they see him as emotionally abusive.

My, "Why am I like this moment?" Even though I know I need to end things with him, I can never get up the courage. I'm a pushover and a people pleaser who hates hurting others, so splitting up with him seems unimaginable.

TL;DR Can't end a toxic relationship because I'm a cowardly pushover. AquaFlush789

Taking Forever.

Due tomorrow? Do tomorrow. Doesn't matter if it's a major project for work or a large portion of my grade. I will procrastinate everything, tell myself not to do this dumb crap again next week, do the same dumb crap. IssaDatBoiMura

Awkward.....

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All the freaking time man. I overthink and overanalyze everything I do. And sometimes it helps me avoid mistakes at work so its not entirely a bad thing, but it usually screws me like when I'm hanging out with a girl and I overthink something I'm gonna say so there's just this weird silence. Awkward. JoblessJester

Past Receipts....

After 20, it's all been, "ohhhh, so this is why I'm messed up" when I look at my childhood and family. brand21new

Saaaaaame. I rarely talk about my childhood with my wife, but she'll ask me questions occasionally or tell me about hers and I'm all "ugh, wow yeah my life was not like that… maybe that's why I have [insert random insecurities and triggers]"somethingthatswitty

Keep Dreaming....

I know i have to do something, and all I do is imagine myself doing it while lying in my bed. mumu023

Same, I hate it, I've been wondering what's wrong with me for years. It's gotten to the point I wake up in the morning, shut off my alarm and immediately fall asleep. Then I start dreaming of me waking up, getting ready for school, getting on the bus and actually waking up at 1 pm sweating like hell. I don't even realize I'm dreaming. FrappyTex

Look Away....

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Every time we have a family get-together. I get all excited about food and seeing my family and then I get there and I'm just like "It's too peoplely here, too much eye contact, too many conversations going on all at once around me, too much, too much, too much, must go hide in the closet!!!!"

It's always so anticlimactic when I have to go hide in the closet. Or the bathroom, usually. No one bothers me there.Squirrelgirl25

Thanks Dad. 

I have serious anxiety and trust issues, courtesy of my dad (thanks fool, now I take therapy because of you). I know I'm overthinking and worrying too much, but I just can't get some thoughts out of my head.

Whenever someone is, for example, only 5 minutes late, I start to think of that person being in horrific accidents in my head. Its stuck there until they arrive, or get a message saying they're late.

I can't trust people with a lot of stuff. I know this, as it hit me when someone pointed it out. They might have just said it as a side note, but it actually hit me hard. I have trouble entrusting people with doing anything, or trust they will keep their promises.

These two have lead me to have more of an isolated life, since its hard for me to get close to people. I still do have close friends and family, but they are few in number. Dongwook23

Sing Out. 

I was at my therapist and we were talking about the process of learning how to be more open around people, in order to make it easier to form a connection, and i kept telling her the things i probably couldn't do in public due to my worthlessness and so on, and she kept contradicting those statements, such as "you told me like 5 minutes ago that you could in fact, sing karaoke" not an example sentence, this was a real thing ive done, and she did that about 5 more times to different examples i would give, till something sparked to realization in my mind, and i sorta said out loud "oh shit, i have done all this stuff.... why am i so hard on myself..." my therapists face lit up like she struck gold and said "that's a very good question huh?" Freddie30234

Dark Laughs.....

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Directly after I tell a joke, because I've clearly forgotten that the people I'm with aren't into dark/morbid humor. ThisWasAValidName

Hey, friend

Same problem, but the more weirded out they are the harder I laugh....

And I think it turns into a contagious laughter thing as they start laughing too....

Although there have been times where people don't laugh too and I'm left laughing alone hysterically which isn't healthy haha.... tulsehill

Hey Mary...

Had the spiciest Bloody Mary ever. I couldn't even finish it but when we went to the next bar, I just knew I had to throw up. Spicy vomit might be the worst. Then I went and drank beer and ate Chinese food. The next morning was rough.Reddit

Love Alone.

Falling head over heels in love with someone who is unavailable. Why am I like this? rebelliousturian

Same i am currently in love with a twitch streamer that lives halfway around the world from me. Its not even like i would know how to talk to her if she was close either. PM_me_porn_pls

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Who else ponders their existence on the regular?