People Who Have Been Roasted Online Share Their Most Devastating Burns

"Somebody said..."

Somebody said "how does your boyfriend feel about waking up to Elmer Fudd?" and it was like haha okay I got a big forehead. But later I started dating a new guy and when fooling around he laughed and said "hey you kind of look like Elmer Fudd. You hunting rabbits?" He had absolutely no way of seeing or knowing of that comment. I broke down crying because two people is too much to be a coincidence.

Dr_Fluffybuns2

"My wife..."

"Does your wife let you leave the house looking like that?"

"My wife died three years ago."

"Well, from the looks of your sorry self, she's in a better place."

BeerDrinkinGreg

"It was something like..."

It was something like "You look like Jason Momoa and Thor had a baby with Down Syndrome." I guess my special power is looking special.

TheJackalIsDoom

"The funny comments..."

A lot of roast me's, especially ones that don't get very popular, have commenters that rather than being scathingly funny or cleverly insulting choose to go for harshly cruel or weirdly, irrelevantly specific.

The funny comments I got in my now deleted roast me were about my receding hairline, my big nose, the look on my face, my tattoos, etc. The ones that annoyed me were the ones based on assumptions about my personality or who I am.

In retrospect, I totally asked for it, but a lot of people on that subreddit use it as an outlet for their anger, or an excuse to sh!t on someone rather than coming up with a real, funny-because-it's-true roast.

Ironically, one of the biggest victims of this are attractive women.

imgurlslashTk2oG

"While it's..."

"If we could harness all the oil off your forehead, we could make America energy independent by next year!"

While it's actually pretty funny now, I was only 15 and was already incredibly insecure (you know, how most high school girls are at that point). I think I ended up deleting it around 3 hours after posting and then immediately looked for r/toastme in attempt to regain even an ounce of self-esteem. Good times

awgTW

"Now..."

R/roastme is how I found out my eyes aren't level. Never noticed till some guy hit me with it. Now I see it every time.

Bawlze

"In an alt account..."

In an alt-account, I posted a pic of mine on r/roastme and clarified that I was a gay male in the title. I was just curious to see what would come of it.

The post itself didn't really get noticed much and didn't get a lot of comments. Most were just lame like I particularly remember something to the effect of "HAHA YOU LIKE BLACK DILDO" and have a daddy fetish.

dr_franck

"I have a thick skin..."

I have a thick skin, but someone said I look like Andre' $3000 in debt. It was both the funniest and meanest thing I've heard about myself.

Nyther

"Lonely people..."

"Lonely people take long and hot showers to get the warmth of those who they need."

They really called me out.

anxiety_prime123

"You know that feeling..."

"You know that feeling when you break the wrist on your dominant arm and you have to wipe with your weak hand? Yeah, you look like the human version of that."

Darthmollsack