Well, the annals of Dictators on Horseback just got a dazzling new entry.
Step aside, Vladimir Putin...
...because winter, and Kim Jong Un, are coming!
The North Korean dictator recently did a (thankfully fully clothed) horseback photo shoot on snowcapped Mount Paektu, and hoo boy, was it a Game of Thronesian fantasy.
Winter Is Coming. And there is a King In The North https://t.co/gYjgBZMO8H— Josh Smith (@Josh Smith) 1571181920.0
They really were something, these pics...
North Korean state media KCNA releases photos of leader Kim Jong Un riding a white horse on Mount Paektu https://t.co/VsicwSBCjA— AFP news agency (@AFP news agency) 1571189296.0
So why all the fuss—and why Mount Paektu?
Well, the mountain, which is an active volcano (a perfect fit for the Glorious Leader) is sacred in Korean culture as it is said to be the birthplace of the Korean kingdom's founder, Dangun, more than 4,000 years ago.
What, you thought Kim Jong Un would just horseback-ride up any old snowcapped hill?
How dare you! He is a god among men! Go to jail immediately!
After all, is that any way to think about the man who North Korean state media describes like this?
"[his eyes] were full of noble glitters of the illustrious commander who clearly indicates the road of advance of a powerful socialist country that is achieving prosperity with its own efforts and by dint of storm of Mt Paektu in the face of all headwinds."
Kim Jong-un’s eyes “were full of noble glitters of the illustrious commander who clearly indicates the road of adva… https://t.co/ikS12RuiFH— Laura Bicker (@Laura Bicker) 1571181732.0
Anyway, a visit to the mountain is said to be auspicious.
The North Korean state news agency spared no words telling us about the glory of their Leader's heroic ride.
KCNA: "All the officials accompanying him were convinced with overflowing emotion and joy that there will be a grea… https://t.co/qOZiesw93Q— William Gallo (@William Gallo) 1571186814.0
As they—very subtly—put it:
"All the officials accompanying him were convinced with overflowing emotion and joy that there will be a great operation to strike the world with wonder again and make a step forward in the Korean revolution."
Translation: Kim Jong Un often visits Mount Paektu before big announcements, leading many to speculate that something big is coming from North Korea in the coming days.
Okay, so Grand Marshal Kim Jong Un recently climbed Mt. Paektu again. What does this mean? Well, every time he's cl… https://t.co/TAJxkTQVOf— 鍾翔宇 Xiangyu ☭ (@鍾翔宇 Xiangyu ☭) 1571195434.0
#Chairman Kim Jong Un climbed up the Mt. Paektu on his white horse. #Korean watchers all know that Chairman Kim use… https://t.co/DYt42KOSAH— The Beginning... (@The Beginning...) 1571185224.0
But for most folks, that was all incidental—the real story was the photos themselves—and, of course, the jokes that write themselves.
Well these pics of Kim Jong Un scaling Paektusan on a white horse are... quite something https://t.co/oyo1Vqt5mk— Oliver Hotham (@Oliver Hotham) 1571180932.0
Ok now we have the galloping shots.. https://t.co/cmYBheApia— Laura Bicker (@Laura Bicker) 1571183012.0
@BBCLBicker Why isn't he wearing a helmet???— Merlin Fulcher (@Merlin Fulcher) 1571183134.0
@BBCLBicker Thank god he hasn't gone full Putin and gone topless— stand free and keep calm (@stand free and keep calm) 1571183225.0
Early signs the new Game of Thrones spinoff might not be that great. https://t.co/Gxvbojjw8u— Jon C (@Jon C) 1571203977.0
Not sure why but this one has much more of a "Narnia" vibe. I think I can see a lamppost behind him https://t.co/BKyQokKUcX— Josh Smith (@Josh Smith) 1571182069.0
#HotBoyWinter is here. #KimJongUn https://t.co/Tjf8O7tVws— Joseph Holguin 🤖 (@Joseph Holguin 🤖) 1571229103.0
Why is a picture of Pugsley Addams riding a pony trending right now? #KimJongUn https://t.co/vw5XkscAtC— Patrick Costello (@Patrick Costello) 1571229877.0
And for some, a closer look only magnified the hilarity.
@OliverHotham This is making me laugh much harder than is reasonable https://t.co/9Kg9A00TeX— Francine Mills (@Francine Mills) 1571184746.0
And led some to theorize about possible conspiracies afoot in these photos...
@ashab613 @OliverHotham “His” legs seem awfully short in that side shot. I mean, I’m five foot even, and I’m pretty… https://t.co/F8q2U4XHSi— Hi, I’m Peach Mint (@Hi, I’m Peach Mint) 1571188349.0
Photoshopped. If not, poor horsy. But then again, the "great leader" #KimJongUn was reported to have climbed a snow… https://t.co/dfh7bB4LPx— Charles Lindberg (@Charles Lindberg) 1571227281.0
Those coat pockets are packed with Mars bars. https://t.co/yEI8TzfSBm— Julia Hartley-Brewer (@Julia Hartley-Brewer) 1571213405.0
That last one is definitely the most plausible.
But conspiracy or not, you have to admit that these pictures speak well beyond a thousand words.
As the @nprpolitics would say, I can’t let go of Kim Jong Un riding a white horse. I’m trying to watch the… https://t.co/Xwrt5LT0Za— Hi, I’m Peach Mint (@Hi, I’m Peach Mint) 1571189834.0
Try as we may, our mere mortal minds will never truly comprehend such resplendence. Such is the magic of Kim Jong Un and his noble steed.
The comedy film The Interview, available here, is a parody that tells the story of Dave Skylark (James Franco) and his producer Aaron Rapaport (Seth Rogen) who run the popular celebrity tabloid TV show 'Skylark Tonight.' When they discover that North Korean leader Kim Jong-un is a fan of the show, they land an interview with him in an attempt to legitimize themselves as journalists. As Dave and Aaron prepare to travel to Pyongyang, their plans change when the CIA recruits them, perhaps the most unlikely candidates, to "take out" Kim Jong-un.
Have you listened to the first season of George Takei's podcast, 'Oh Myyy Pod!'?
In season one we explored the racially charged videos that have taken the internet by storm.
We're hard at work on season two so be sure to subscribe here so you don't miss it when it goes live.
Here's one of our favorite episodes from season one. Enjoy!