Most of us know what to do in this situation: It's been a long day and your dying to relax with that nice cold one in your hand, but there is not an opener in sight. Nothing to stress about. All you need is the closest countertop and the right angle of the neck, and you're popping that cap off your much-deserved bottle of beer with just a swing of your hand.
Don't you feel manly?
But what happens when there is no countertop? Worse...
What do you do when you're stuck on a train? What do you do then when you just have to have a brewski?
Before you go stripping the enamel of your teeth, a passenger on London's Southern Rail has a public service announcement that you should watch.
Patrick Dalton is an author and photography, and clearly, a man who lets no situation get between him and his beer.
Just discovered an @SouthernRailUK life hack! https://t.co/UYkX4YEA0R— Patrick Dalton (@Patrick Dalton) 1510609271.0
Pretty dope moves there. Unfortunately, unless you find yourself riding the Southern Rail anywhere from London Bridge to Uckfield, you might not be able to replicate the experience. Those weird, little ripples in the roof of the train cars do look... particular.
But for a moment, Patrick Dalton felt like the MacGyver of London's metropolitan transport.
@SouthernRailUK I feel like MacGyver or Ray Mears right now.— Patrick Dalton (@Patrick Dalton) 1510609335.0
Then he back peddled a bit.
@SouthernRailUK I'm going to dial that back to 'The Fonz', I was over excited.— Patrick Dalton (@Patrick Dalton) 1510609650.0
Though some people thought he shouldn't back down from his awesomeness. One dared suggest that Patrick was the Bear Grylis of urban survival.
@shitlondon @SouthernRailUK https://t.co/2Gb4IuiLyC— Chris Corfield (@Chris Corfield) 1510655387.0
"Don't work hard, work smart." The Dalton family motto.
@notoliverbutler @SouthernRailUK That's my family motto— Patrick Dalton (@Patrick Dalton) 1510610264.0
Publications wanted to share this video on their websites.
When tabloid The Sun reached out to Patrick to host this video, with full credit, his response was... well, it wasn't a "yes."
"Hi, I'd love to let you use this video but unfortunately I think The Sun is a divisive waste of innocent trees."
@nadia_taffom @TheSun Hi, I'd love to let you use this video but unfortunately I think The Sun is a divisive waste of innocent trees.— Patrick Dalton (@Patrick Dalton) 1510686253.0
@shitlondon @TheSun Hi, the sun is actually a sphere of hot plasma situated at the centre of the solar system. It i… https://t.co/vd5nbZhtWx— Aidan Moffat (@Aidan Moffat) 1510687322.0
And there was a little bit of drama.
@NeilWesthead @shitlondon @TheSun Haha 😂 calm down 😂 go and smoke some of your super cool cigar 😂 maybe that will calm you down brother 😂— Aidan Moffat (@Aidan Moffat) 1510694296.0
It seems everyone wants to share Patrick's hack. With other publishers, he was a bit more receptive.
@sadiq_maheen @MetroUK Hi, DM me. Thanks— Patrick Dalton (@Patrick Dalton) 1510649828.0
For some people the beer life hack is a game changer.
They can't wait to try it for themselves.
@ar10642 @shitlondon @krn @SouthernRailUK 👌 We should ALL do this on the way up on the CDT!— Neil Davey. (@Neil Davey.) 1510692141.0
But for others, it is old news.
@shitlondon @KatyCycles @SouthernRailUK I knew that years ago. Just didn't make a video :-)— Mark Strong (@Mark Strong) 1510613171.0
@ladyvip87 @shitlondon @SouthernRailUK Been doing that for 10 years plus . Well old— tom rumball (@tom rumball) 1510676560.0
And there is the matter of collateral damage to consider.
"Only a matter of time before an article is written on the thousands of pounds of damage done to Southern Rail carriages each year by passengers trying to open beer bottles."
@shitlondon @DaftLimmy @SouthernRailUK Only a matter of time before an article is written on the thousands of pound… https://t.co/bRK8iJryit— Lewis (@Lewis) 1510663819.0
Then there was the matter of the Russian.
@shitlondon @SouthernRailUK @ConorOD_ we didn’t need that Russian man to do it!— Ed Hutson (@Ed Hutson) 1510696258.0
You mean this guy?
This Russian knows 30 ways of opening a beer bottle 😂 🍺 https://t.co/m8fZgKbzsM— Daily Mail Online (@Daily Mail Online) 1509748202.0
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