I can definitely tell you that I did not receive much sex ed growing up. It definitely happened–it was folded into our biology classes, actually–but it focused more on how the reproductive cycle works and didn't cover the things that are often lacking in sex ed.
For instance, comprehensive sexual education should include lessons on human development. Reproduction, puberty, sexual orientation, and gender identity would all fit under this.
Personal skills should be emphasized too: Communications, negotiation, and decision-making are all–or should be–integral to sexual education.
People have plenty of opinions on the matter, as I'm sure you can imagine.
We heard their thoughts after Redditor clou_dor asked the online community:
"What should be covered in sex ed class but never is?"
"So I went through middle school..."
"This is gonna sound dumb but here it is. In sex ed, they would tell us how much we bleed during our period but never the pressure of the blood. So I went through middle school thinking that if my period started, blood would be GUSHING OUT, like if i got stabbed."
"I was paranoid as a preteen thinking at any time my period could start and i would end up drenched in blood from the waist down. No one ever told me the blood pressure was not in fact that of a stab wound but more of a nose bleed or a dripping faucet."
idek_lmao
To which this person replied:
"Also the different colors it can be. The first time I got my period I thought I somehow got skid marks in the front of my panties. I wasn't worried about it being a period, I thought I pooped myself and it all sprayed forward."
DirtyMarTeeny
"I had no idea..."
"Miscarriages. I had no idea that a miscarriage was like five days of the worst cramps and unending blood. This is a thing that happens to like 1/3 of women and most of us have no idea until we have one and then no one talks about it."
No-country-2008
To which this person replied:
"I think everyone should know just how common miscarriages are! It's quite likely that multiple women you know have had at least one."
robophile_ta
"The number of people..."
"How STD/STIs actually affect you and what treatments there are available."
"The number of people who don't realize being asymptomatic is the most common symptom is shocking. Also the amount of men who think they still shove a little umbrella up their urethra and scrape it out to cure gonorrhea is sad. You take a pill for it. The invasive penis scraping was a very old and very not used anymore treatment."
"Also they could do more to destigmatize getting tested regularly if you have multiple partners or getting tested at the beginning of each relationship if you're a monogamous person. STD/STIs don't devalue you and I find sex ed really doesn't do anything other than make people feel dirty and ashamed about contracting something."
"Chances are the person who gave it to you was asymptomatic and didn't know they had it and are also victims of a fear and shame based sexual health education."
123throwawaybanana
To which this person replied:
"I got tested before a new relationship and thwy wouldn't let me gove blood becauee I must have had a reason to think I was sick."
Nellasofdoriath
"I straight thought..."
"How vaginal discharge changes based on your fertile days - I straight thought I was getting sick as a teen."
Spazztastic85
To which this person replied:
"And that ovulation cramps are a thing. And I hate them. I’ve had them since I was a teen and I always thought something was wrong. I would ask my friends and no one else normally got them so that info didn’t help."
BroadBaker5101
"We didn't learn..."
"We didn't learn about childbirth. At all. Nothing about dilation, contractions, labor etc."
Spicyhashbrowns
To which this person replied:
"I believe that it's intentional that they don't talk about childbirth because it is terrifying, and most women won't be enthusiastic about going through it. So they promote the cute picture of babies growing and how wonderful everything would be."
Vivid379
"A vast majority..."
"Pornography needs to be put in context. A vast majority of sexual intercourse isn't anything like that."
seefifth
To which this person replied:
"This comment needs to be higher. Learning about sex only through porn is like learning to cook having only watched 'reality' shows where they make a 4 course dinner in an hour while your school system is saying you're too young to use the stove."
Puzzleheadedbat
"The whole..."
"The whole of the actual clitoral structure."
tinygriggle
To which this person replied:
"We didn't even have the clitoris mentioned. Or anything in the vagina or vulva. We got a diagram of a uterus and that was it."
ShiraCheshire
"Aside from the pain..."
"Not just how to prevent getting an STD, but how to handle it emotionally and have honest dialogue with future partners if you do end up getting one. I personally was almost two years into a committed relationship when my partner gave me herpes."
"Aside from the pain and psychological effect it had on me, I was even more hurt to find out years later that he knew he had it from a previous relationship but didn’t tell me or try to protect me in any way. Totally preventable and unnecessary."
uoyroftonsisihT
To which this person replied:
"I came to say this. And also that you shouldn't be ashamed of having an STD. It's so common that it's terrible how talking about it is still a taboo for some people."
Brujula9
"Sex ed is often very focused..."
"Pregnancy. Sex ed is often very focused on avoiding getting pregnant and avoiding getting STIs. How much being pregnant sucks is rarely discussed."
737900ER
To which this person replied:
"I also think that sex ed should teach some realities of raising a child. Especially with newborns, roughly the first few months to first year is difficult because they tend to cry for just about every reason you can think of. But on top of that children throw tantrums, misbehave, and ask lots of questions. Sometimes annoyingly so."
Ahstia
"Telling people..."
"Telling people about cleanup. Apparently some girls thought their vaginas would just absorb everything and it wouldnt all come out."
VacuumLawyer
To which this person replied:
"Although I knew all the mechanics of sex and what-not, I can safely say that we are absolutely not prepared in any way for the aftermath. Nobody talks about these things."
orangestar17
See how much pain, stress, and embarrassment could be avoided if society was just a little more honest about the human body? Sex ed is nothing to be ashamed about – it's crucial to living a healthy life.
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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