Most of the time, when people feel the need to throw an insult at someone else, they don't give the insult they are about to throw much thought.
Often resorting to juvenile name-calling or similar.
Some people, however, make a point of choosing their words much more carefully, in an effort to ensure the person they're insulting feels almost literally "burned".
Most impressively, they tend to give these insults about the same amount of thought as someone who simply calls someone a "doo-doo head".
Redditor Pristine-Ant-464 was very curious to hear the most impressive insults ever uttered, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most savage but unique insult you’ve heard of?"
A Rather Ironic Wake Up Call...
"A coworker was dealing with a rude caller in reservations."
"She said, 'Sir, you need a nap'."
"There was a pause then he said, 'That's the nicest way anyone has ever told me to fuck off in my entire life'."
"'I'm sorry'."
"I'll never forget it."- Playful-Broccoli-714
Nothing More Embarrassing Than Shoddy Grammar
"You have lowercase teeth and uppercase gums."- Yourclosetmonster
The Harder To Say, The Worse The Burn...
"I don't know what's wrong with you, but I'm sure it's hard to pronounce."- Kuandtity
Not Even Worth It
"Not me but read a cool one from another Redditor:
"'I don't care about you enough to hate you'."- Mirogamer100
Sometimes You CAN Judge A Book By It's Cover...
"My mom said she once read a review of a book that simply said, 'The covers of this book are too far apart'."
"Just nine words to utterly destroy an entire book."- Lachwen
Some Friends They Are...
"None of the people you've considered your best friends ever considered you theirs."- Wezbob
Season 4 Rachel GIF by FriendsGiphy
When Your Whole Life Is A Joke...
"It was something along the lines of 'It took your mom nine months to come up with a joke, and she’s still telling it x years later'.”
"'X' being however old the person is/looks."- manwithoutajetpack
Some Things Need To Be Earned...
"'You look like you're struggling with needing more attention than you're capable of earning'."
"To a self-identified comedian who wouldn't stop bragging 20 times a day on social media to an audience of nobody about how great he is and how much everybody else in the scene are mediocre and need to take lessons from him."- Epistatic
Practice, Practice, Practice...
“'Let’s throw the last song of the show for a goof'."
"'Everybody switch instruments and it’ll sound horrible'."
"'Terry you stay on drums'.”- PaperbackBuddha
Drumming Rock Band GIF by Adult SwimGiphy
Pulling Out The Big Words, Are We?
"Someone at work called me 'morally supine' once."- DanielAbraham
All Purpose, Whole Wheat, Or Self-Rising?
"If you were a spice, you'd be flour."- KareemFurbunchies
Rule Britannia!
"I loved the comeback I saw online when someone tried to Grammar Nazi someone's post."
"The response was, 'You're speaking English because it's the only language you know'."
"I'm speaking English because it's the only language you know'."- Jdawg_mck1996
Sally Kohn Grammar GIF by The Opposite of HateGiphy
Time Served.
"Thank you for your time, I won’t be needing any more of it."- Gunningham
Wow.
"Everyone who ever loved you was wrong."- King_Everything
From A Right-Handed Person, One Assumes?
"Either, 'You look like a horse in a man costume', or 'You look like something I've drawn with my left hand'."- SimianFrood
Oh Yeah Horse GIF by Kochstrasse™Giphy
It's a strange feeling indeed when you want to give a round of applause to someone who just openly insulted you.
Then again, it's no secret that powerful words are often all it takes to make someone truly weak at the knees.
@jaketapoer/Bluesky
