Being a parent doesn't just stop once your kids turn 18, which one Redditor is learning the hard way.
On the popular subreddit "Am I The A**hole?" SlipperyGypsy- told the story of how her kid keeps coming home while she's away to steal things she wants.
She titled the story "AITA for telling my (48F) daughter (26F) that she is not allowed in my house anymore unless I am home?"
"I had an open door policy with all of my kids, they could all come over to my house any time they wanted for whatever reason. Usually they just come over to take a sh*t in my toilet or say hi or whatever. They just pop in whenever they are around or whatever. They are all moved out and they all live on their own."
"However, my 26 year old daughter comes over to my house at specific times when she knows that I will be sleeping or not home. She NEVER comes over when she knows that I will be home or not asleep. She specifically does this so she can rifle through my stuff, steal food or juice out of my fridge, steal soap or shampoo out of my bathroom or steal change off of my counter."
"I've told her many times that she is welcome to come over but asked her to stop stealing my sh*t. She says that it's a mother's job to provide for her kids and I should not be complaining. She says that I "owe her" because I am her mother."
"Today I caught her filling a shopping bag with sh*t out of my pantry and I told her flat out that I do not want her in my house anymore unless I am home and awake. She said I'm an a**hole because all parents let their kids shop at their house. AITA?"
According to the other children on Reddit, this kid's behavior was unacceptable.
"Edited because I forgot to pass judgment. 'All parents let kids shop at their house.' Umm, no. When I visit, I am not afraid to eat some of their food, use the bathroom, you know, normal stuff, but I don't freaking steal money or food."
"Honestly, if I was you I would change the locks, tell your other kids not to give her a key and make sure they know what she is doing. NTA." -Dontrocktheboat1986
Parents aren't a store where you can "shop" for free stuff.
"Yeah and if I'm ever short on anything (for instance toilet paper rn because people are crazy) I'll ASK for what I need and if my mother has anything she can spare I know she won't say no. But that is a rare occasion. Grown, functional adults don't "shop" at their parents' house." -WritingOnCoattails
Of course, there are exceptions.
"I tend to rifle through my parents things because my dad buys a lot of shelf-stable food items as souvenirs (stuff like sauces or snacks), stocks them literally all over the house, and then completely forgets about them for 5 years until they go off. I have a standing deal that I can take anything that had a best by date of at least 3 years prior." -RevolutionaryDong
There's a difference between just taking something and waiting until it's offered.
"My parents are super great. They do things like let me have all the leftovers, pay for my dinner if we eat out, given me toilet paper, etc. But it's all offered and I don't just take it. Sounds incredibly rude to just go see your parent(s) for free stuff and not even want to say hi or see how they are doing." -evelyneda
Pretty much everyone seemed to agree this parent was in the right.
"I've never heard of someone going into their parents house and just taking food. My parents are amazing (sounds like op is too) so if they know I'm low on funds/food/toilet paper they will offer stuff to me. I don't just walk into their house and take things."
"I've had to ask my mum for loans for classes/equipment she's more than happy to help me out, but again I don't just go and assume the money is mine because she's my mum. I'm only 20 and I know that I need to be able to manage my own money to allow myself enough for rent/food/gas etc and not rely on stealing to make it through life."
"The daughter sounds entitled, OP change your locks and tell her you are putting up boundaries she needs to follow. After all, your house your rules, that doesn't stop because she moved out... If she's under your roof she's under your rules imo (at least in this instance cuz who the f*ck would do this)" -CoCa_Coa
This daughter needs to realize she's not entitled to random items from her parents.
"NTA. The only people who do this are college kids like me who sometimes do it around the holidays or if I'm home for a long weekend and that's because there is an unspoken kind of agreement where I snag a couple rolls of TP or paper towel and my dad hands me a twenty for gas just to be nice And occasionally I steal some cookies from the pantry on my way out."
"Or my mom purposely buys things I like because she knows I'm coming and she lets me take them with me when I leave. I'm graduating college and moving back to my hometown and I would never think I could just take stuff from my parents kitchen without permission especially if I was 26 f*cking years old" -andersonala45
Once a kid grows up, they should work to help their parents, not the other way around!
"When I was a kid I would have to ask if I could have snacks, they weren't just free to eat without permission, pretty sure my mother would slap me stupid if I went into her house as an adult and started taking her food. As a side note you expected to provide until kids are 18, once you are old they are expected to help care for you. Just be petty as h*ll and go to her house say you are struggling now you are older and fill up a bag of her stuff see how she likes it" -Catherineb
This is not normal behavior.
"This. I have never heard of shopping in your parents cabinets or refrigerator being a common thing. The only time I have ever "shopped" at my mom's house was when my parents were getting ready to leave on vacation and she told me to come take the milk and perishables out of the fridge so they didn't get nasty while she was gone. So much NTA." -TheDreadPirateJenny
Perhaps it's not too late for a counter-offensive...
"NTA Time to change the locks and start some tough love. Maybe look into putting her up for adoption." -shendrad
It about time this child learned a lesson—you can't just take things you want, even if it's from your parents!
