Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Emotional Mom Shares A Truly Powerful Lesson That She Learned From Her 2-Year-Old Son

Sometimes it takes a child to teach adults the most valuable lessons. Facebook user Lily Isobella was tucking her son in for bed one night when he said something that truly surprised her: after she asked for a hug, he turned her down. Though her feelings were hurt, she realized the importance of the moment.


Isobella told the entire story in a Facebook post:

"The two words that broke my heart....My son looked up at me, with his huge 2 year old blue eyes, and said, in all sincerity: "NOT TONIGHT" After asking him for a goodnight hug, I felt like my heart had been ripped into tiny little pieces, and I was instantly awash with a hundred replies that wanted to tumble out of my mouth."
"BUT you hugged daddy…
BUT you know you want to… we always do…
Don't you LOVE me?
But I WANT to cuddle you…"


Lily Isobella/Facebook


But before she forced a hug on her son, Isobella had a crucial epiphany:

"And in that moment, I had to stop and realise that I had created something marvellous. A 2 year old who felt safe enough to impose his own limits on touch and affection, with a parent. A 2 year old who was exercising his first rights to consent over his body.


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Just because she understood didn't make it any easier, however.

"God damn it, it sucked. Because I wanted affection. I wanted a cuddle. I wanted soft squishy 2 year old sleep soaked day end cuddles. I wanted love. And didn't I have a right to that??? No. That's the short answer. As much as I wanted it, I didn't have a right to cuddle and hold his tiny body - no matter what my upbringing had taught me."
"As I fought against all the internal messages of not being loved, not being a good parent, not getting what I wanted (hello Leo pride!!), it was hard to find the voice that reminded me: THIS is his choice and he absolutely has a right to it. And THIS is an awesome learning opportunity."


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Isobella told her son it was no big deal.

"'No worries my boy', I replied. 'No cuddles tonight. I'lll wave goodnight and I'll see you tomorrow' And then, the two words that almost broke me:
'Sorry Mummy'
THIS was the teaching moment. This was the moment to make it count."


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Isobella realized how important it was that her son not associate his own right to consent with feelings of guilt:

"You see, I spend a lot of my time talking to parents about talking to their kids about sex, and most of the time, I have to convince them that this conversation does not start at puberty. It starts in moments just like this. At 2 years of age, when your son thinks he needs to apologise for exercising his right to consent. These are the moments that you have to make count.
So I went right back in and sat on his bed, and we talked. We talked about how it is ok to not want cuddles and say so. We talked about not every being sorry for how you feel. We talked about what to do if we want a cuddle one day, but not the next day. What to do if we want a cuddle and our best friend doesn't. What to do if we start a cuddle with someone and they get half way through and don't want to keep cuddling. What to do if someone cuddles you, even if we already said NO CUDDLES.
Because, that is how you teach consent & safety."


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Though many parents and teachers fail to teach these lessons in any meaningful way, they should be taught at an early age.

"You don't wait until kids are 13 and struggling with the cocktail of desire, hormones and media. You don't wait until you can sit down and have "the talk". You don't wait for it to be purely about sex. You do it, all the time, at every opportunity, from the time you can speak to your child.
Even when it hurts your heart.
Even when it "triggers" you
Even when it is inconvenient
Even when they are only tiny
Even when it seems inconsequential.
You grab that opportunity and you talk the shit out of it."


Commenters on Facebook were inspired by Lily's message:

Lily Isobella/Facebook


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Lily Isobella/Facebook


Well done, Lily! If any parents would like to learn a lesson from this wise mother, she's going on tour and may just be speaking in a city near you.

"That right there is a courageous conversation. We are given these opportunities every single day with our kids. We just need to pay attention and be brave enough to be with them in the moment. Come and learn the best ways to start having the most important conversations you will ever have with your kids... I am going to be in a city near you in February https://lilyisobella.com.au/parenting-forum/"

More from Trending

Vivian Wilson
@vivllainous/Instagram

Elon Musk's Trans Daughter Just Made Her Drag Debut At An Anti-ICE Fundraiser—And Fans Are Obsessed

Elon Musk's disowned trans daughter Vivian Jenna Wilson has made a name for herself online for mercilessly dragging the father who once said she was "dead" to him because she was "killed by the woke mind virus."

But recently she took it to a new level, leveraging her fame in her first drag performance at a Los Angeles anti-ICE fundraiser.

Keep ReadingShow less
Donald Trump
Brendan Smialowski/AFP via Getty Images

Trump Administration Fast-Tracks Eliminating National Suicide Hotline's LGBTQ+ Youth Support

On Wednesday morning, news broke that the administration of MAGA Republican President Donald Trump was eliminating certain suicide and self harm resources provided through the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.

The lifeline offered callers options to speak to people who specialize in meeting their needs. But the Trump administration decided this was a service that LGBTQ+ young people don't deserve.

Keep ReadingShow less
Donald Trump
Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

Trump Blasted For Announcing New Additions To The White House Lawn As Global Tensions Escalate

President Donald Trump was criticized after announcing that two new flagpoles would be added to the North and South Lawns of the White House—not the greatest look amid heightened global unease as tensions between Israel and Iran ramp up.

According to the Associated Press, Trump watched as a crane installed the newest flagpole on the South Lawn, remarking, “It’s such a beautiful pole.” He later returned to the site to salute as the American flag was raised for the first time.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots of Donald Trump from CNN supercut
CNN

Trump Mocked For 'Two Weeks' Iran Deadline With Supercut Of All His 'Two Weeks' Promises

President Donald Trump has a history of promising to resolve problems within "two weeks," and a new viral supercut mocks him for all the times he's said as much—including right now with tensions in the Middle East higher than ever.

Trump said Thursday he will decide within two weeks whether to involve U.S. forces directly in the escalating conflict between Israel and Iran, citing what he called a “substantial chance” for renewed nuclear negotiations with Tehran.

Keep ReadingShow less
red flag with pole on seashore
Seoyeon Choi on Unsplash

People Break Down The 'Silent Red Flags' Folks Tend To Ignore In Relationships

A red flag has come to mean any warning sign in life, in addition to the literal red flags that are placed on beaches or industrial sites to warn people of danger.

People will respond to situations by saying, "That’s a red flag." But before that language evolved, they'd just call them "warning signs."

Keep ReadingShow less