In celebration of World Pasta Day on October 25, graphic designer and pasta aficionado David Rudnick decided to definitely rank the top 22 non-canon pastas shapes, carefully using "scientific" methods, to the delight of appetites across the Twitterverse.
World Pasta Day was cooked up at the World Past Congress on October 25, 1995, when pasta-philes from around the world joined forces in the kitchen to spread knowledge of the world's panorama of pasta, and to educate people about the cultural and culinary importance of pasta. For example, did you know there are approximately 350 types of pasta?
But what pasta shape is the best?
David Rudnick pondered this noodle-twisting quandary himself. He took it upon himself to determine what pasta is the best, and what is pasta is the worst, once and for all in a fierce competition judged by his own palate. He began by honoring World Pasta Day, and then revealed the pasta contestants - a carefully compiled shortlist of 22 Non-Primary-Canon pasta shapes (i.e. you won't be seeing spaghetti, penne, or ravioli on this list), compiled by Rudnick himself through top secret means.
entries this year are drawn from a shortlist that was CAREFULLY compiled by applying BRUTAL and SCIENTIFIC criteria… https://t.co/7CwQdVvrCb— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508942158.0
Rudnick tweeted out his rankings in ascending order, beginning with what he determined to be the worst pasta shape. And no, he was not gentle with the poor pastas, lashing out criticisms that would have left Gordon Ramsay blushing.
Croxetti, Capellini, and Rombi were sent home crying.
Judge David to Capellini: "I don't care if ur famous, you are just Garbage Spaghetti."
22. *LAST PLACE* – Croxetti • pasta NOT a place for GraphicsDesign • this is just a disc • m8 • TERRIBLE sauce ret… https://t.co/6RAJq0bpvk— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508942468.0
20. Rombi • Oh dear • Almost feeling sorry for you • those ridges aren't gonna help the sauce stay on m8 • marks g… https://t.co/UZA8nOKpVS— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508942761.0
Conchiglie, Girandole, and Fusili Avellinesi found themselves ranked in the middle. No one likes being the middle child.
Judge David to Fusili Avellinesi: "A Real Conversation Starter" and a "bold mover."
13. Conchiglie • needs to be al dente • fabulous sauce transporter • squirts boiling sauce into roof of mouth when… https://t.co/xkNQ3I7nQs— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508944187.0
11. Fusili Avellinesi • "The Thinking Man's Girandole™" • A Real Conversation Starter • bold mover • Ultimately no… https://t.co/C3kIB8DBUk— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508944635.0
Radiatori was bestowed the honor of runner-up...
2. Radiatori • Many compound frills • adds baroque surface complexity to even simple meals • spoon-friendly shape… https://t.co/mKzKrN8uiq— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508946963.0
...and finally, Rudnick determined Mafaldine as the reining champ of pastas, for artful ruffling and extraordinary ability to hold sauce.
1. Mafaldine • THE CHAMP IS HERE • a sauce-holding miracle • enormous surface area yet still fork-navigable • Long… https://t.co/byNLzeuhk3— ཊལབསརངཧ (@ཊལབསརངཧ)1508947176.0
His work completed, David took a sip of his coffee and leaned back in his chair. TeenVogue and Time Magazine honored him with recognition, the latter crowning Rudnick as the "Pasta King."
Twitterverse thanked him for his service.
It's good to be reminded sometimes that the world can still be a beautiful, good, and noodley place. https://t.co/TzTy0SrfG6— Isaac Betty (@Isaac Betty)1508963205.0