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tifu
Or even further back in time...
Is bang still a thing??
A man shared his own lost in translation moment with the "Today I F'ked Up" (TIFU) subReddit after a missed opportunity with his wife.
Redditor Crudbum posted:
"TIFU by misunderstanding a text from my wife, thinking my kid had thrown up, and missing out on sex."
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
"The other night my wife and I were getting ready for bed and being kind of flirty. I had to use the restroom, so stayed downstairs while she went up to bed."
"While I was sitting on the toilet I got a text: 'Bring a bucket and a mop'."
"Crap, one of my kids must have thrown up. I finished my toilet biz and went down to the basement to check the cleaning supplies."
"I found a bucket, but couldn't find a mop. I found one of those squeezy sponge things, but the sponge was missing."
"Figuring the vomit was probably congealing by this point, I just grabbed the bucket and a bunch of paper towels and ran upstairs.
I got to the upstairs bathroom and found no mess."
"I carried the cleaning supplies down to my kids rooms, but found no vomit. I went to our bedroom and found my wife lying on the bed."
"She asked what had taken me so long, and I said I couldn't find a mop, and where was the mess?"
"She started rolling around on the bed laughing. Suddenly I realized 'Bring a bucket and a mop' was a line from 'WAP (Wet A** Pu**y)'."
Uh, yeah, not this kind...
"My wife had been in the mood, and I had spent 15 minutes looking for a mop in the basement."
"She was laughing so much that the mood was basically dead."
Redditors could relate.
"As a dude that has been married for 25 years... this story resonates so much. You just get in a groove - words, phrases, signals are just there and you need to be really tuned in to what's going on or you will miss them."
"This is a perfect example and really funny."
"Bucket and mop is a puking kid, sink leaking, dog took a dump on the carpet - certainly not 'WAP'. That being said, you did the right thing."
"If the script was flipped (you run upstairs with your pants around your ankles) to a puking kid... well, that would have been an unfortunate result."
"You did the right thing. Score one for you." ~ ThatLooksLikeItHurts
"I'm not married, but I feel like laughing would make me more in the mood. Especially something wholesome like this."
"It's not like it was a gross joke or a mean prank. It was a joke about sex." ~ ModerateReasonablist
"I am married and I'd laugh my a** off and it would lead to sex. But sometimes it's hard to really get in the mood when you're laughing and to actually get down to business." ~ tibtibs
"You're onto something here. What are the words to WAP for married couples?"
"Lay down a towel for this WAP..."
"Put the kids to bed early to get some WAP..."
" Disney plus and thrust for some WAP..." ~ saint_atheist
Hopefully next time his Missus is in the mood, he'll know "WAP" doesn't mean this:
