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After a first date from hell, a sexual assault survivor gets real on Twitter as she breaks things down for her mansplaining date.
Dating is hard enough as it is, but Twitter user Ericka Persson recently learned it's even harder when your date is a complete and utter tool.
Persson, a digital campaign manager in Brooklyn, took to Twitter to share an all too familiar story about an all too typical date she had last week.
Even though the date itself didn't last long, Persson's company for the evening managed to hit the A-hole trifecta — trying to pressure her to do something she didn't want, ignoring what she was saying, and telling her how to feel.
But the icing on the cake was her date's advice that even though Persson is a survivor of sexual assault, she should be "braver" about opening up to new people...especially nice guys like him.
This one sounds like a keeper.
Thread: Last night I made the mistake of being honest. Around 8:30, a guy asked me out to get sushi locally about… https://t.co/S2iZ8W5yH3— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010771.0
Merp also this thread gets personal so CW: sexual assault— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010771.0
So I get there and meet him. It’s a hole in the wall, so we order at the counter. My sushi is $14. He paid, I offer… https://t.co/GkR1rn1Bro— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010772.0
The restaurant closes at 10, and he was 10 minutes late. So, the date was about 45 minutes long. In an effort to re… https://t.co/47Ywstj30l— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010772.0
So I explain to him that they’re closing, and that’s when he asks “do you want to come back to my place, or go to y… https://t.co/giAdeFmRne— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010773.0
And I say okay, well I don’t really like to have people over after a first date, especially since we’ve only known… https://t.co/UKfN16B5RJ— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010773.0
I tell him I don’t really think I should have to explain why, and he says I’m being overly cautious, the date was “… https://t.co/8LfistrOgn— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010773.0
- we could continue a different day this week - we could take a walk to a coffee shop - we haven’t known each other… https://t.co/2osshYVrpF— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010774.0
He rejects them all. Finally, I tell him *it.* “I have had some bad experiences with men” (do I need to even expand… https://t.co/acyc8fxL5x— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010774.0
“Just because you’ve had some bad experiences with men, you should be able to learn from that, you should be able t… https://t.co/SVvGCrh0Qy— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010774.0
And I realize who I am dealing with. I’ve declined him at this point 10 times. I have said no, and he has rejected… https://t.co/3GEcTgKey8— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010775.0
Done with being ignored, pressured and told how to feel, Persson broke down what real bravery is for her mansplaining date.
So let me be real clear: 1. I am really fucking brave. I had a vivid PTSD dream the night before. I went to work,… https://t.co/LMsqtf8idy— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010775.0
2. I AM NOT a transaction. You don’t put dinner in me and get sex or (probably more significantly) MY TIME. You do not get to buy me.— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010775.0
This boils down to an extreme lack of not just empathy, but seeing and respecting women as people. I shouldn’t have… https://t.co/yWIdbktor6— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010776.0
I don’t walk through the world like you. I am sometimes scared, and I sometimes can work past it, and sometimes it… https://t.co/w1k1wb7uAV— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010776.0
Like the reason I’m scared is because the worst possible thing that could happen, happened. And I don’t want it to… https://t.co/DXFrktjQNG— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010776.0
So today I am furious and sad and I’m going to sit with being uncomfortable like this, and think about how I can ma… https://t.co/K6n5rRTcbB— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010777.0
So PSA men, don’t tell anyone, but especially someone who has told you have been sexually assaulted, to “be brave a… https://t.co/a589rGcsSv— Ericka Persson (@Ericka Persson) 1553010777.0
And Twitter had Persson's back, offering support and applauding her display of actual bravery.
@peoplepersson @rafaelshimunov All around a bad guy... the minute he asked twice and rejected your alternative he s… https://t.co/mll1BrU9xt— readergurrrrl (@readergurrrrl) 1553091508.0
@peoplepersson Bravo standing up for yourself! No one should have to deal with that garbage. I hope you're doing ok… https://t.co/YhiJSS6ewG— Kristine Anne Canidae🐶 (@Kristine Anne Canidae🐶) 1553012604.0
@peoplepersson Sometimes being a woman sounds horrifying. I can’t even imagine.— David L. Wiley (@David L. Wiley) 1553141643.0
@peoplepersson You are brave. No is no and that should be enough. Especially on a first date. You dodged a bullet.… https://t.co/yKVv53I1iV— Lozano (@Lozano) 1553146305.0
As well as a lesson in bravery, Persson's story also serves as a perfect example as to why it's time for men to stop explaining and start listening.