an Oh Myyy Property

We like to think professionals know what they're doing but it's often not the case, like when a roofer doesn't bring a ladder or when a therapist insists they are your only friend. Here are some stories that will boost your self-esteem.

twixtwix asked, What did a professional say or do that made you immediately lose trust in them?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.



Ouch.

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Told my old therapist I didn't want to see her any more and she told me that without her I wouldn't even have any friends.

ThreeeLeaf

Maybe he can fly.

When the roofer didn't bring a ladder.

Papervolcano

Well of COURSE he lied.

I ordered new windows to be installed in my attic and the salesman who came to my house said that it'll be "6 weeks tops to get them in". 3 months later they were delivered. When I spoke to the representative on the phone that I was unhappy about how much longer it actually took and their salesman said 6 weeks she said, "Well OF COURSE he said that, he's a salesman haha.".

japanesepoolboy16

Might wanna find a new accountant.

My bankruptcy attorney was convinced that taxes paid had to be counted as income... NOT gross pay mind you.

Example:

Gross pay is $1000, $300 is taken out for taxes meaning you had a $700 check. He insisted this meant there was $1300 in income.

His reasoning was that there was an area later on the form to deduct taxes, and if we used the pre-tax number of $1000, then after the deducted taxes it would only show a $700 income, which is clearly not the case since I made $1000.

trex005

You've ruined me!

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"Oh, was I not meant to do that? I didn't look at what you booked in for, I just assumed this was what you wanted."

~A woman who is no longer my hairdresser.

cannedtunainbrine

On second thought... can I get a new doctor?

Marked the wrong wrist before surgery!

CptAwesome

Wait, for real?

The current job position I hold is by no means an entry level. When I was hired, I had to go through a rigorous 6 week training program. The first two weeks though, our instructor is part of this program when someone with much lower credentials is allowed to teach initial training to the much more experienced class in order to eventually be given a job at the position we're all in training for (makes sense right?). Anyways anytime we had questions about anything, this instructor would say the words "You are all getting too far ahead, we're going to talk about this next week". It took about 2 days for us to figure out that our instructor did not know the material and had no business attempting to teach us.

Trex_N_Truex

NO, THE OTHER ARM.

I broke my arm and went to an orthopedic office. I didn't like them from the first appointment because I had an appointment and they made me wait for about 2 hours. Then they had their secretary take my past medical history (which is extremely complex) in the waiting room.

On a follow up appointment the tech removed my cast. PA came in to assess my arm and went to my non-broken arm. Assessed strength and range of motion and swelling and told me it seemed to be healing nicely. I told her that's great, since that one was never broken. Once she finished repeating the process on the arm that actually was broken she sent the tech in to recast my arm. I had to stop the tech from casting my non-broken arm. On my appointment paperwork she wrote that she recommended I take Ibuprofen for pain relief. That was exactly 2 sentences after where it stated NSAIDs (like ibuprofen) cause like threatening airway swelling in me. Same office wanted to charge me $50 every visit to sign a form that was literally one check box saying if I was cleared or not for full duty at work. One check box. No research required. I never went back.

AnotherLolAnon

Yeah, you want to drive, but frankly, you suck.

I figured out pretty quickly that i didn't like my driving instructor but other peoples horror stories about changing made me stick with him. 6 months of lessons being told off for minor errors and having the test dangled in front of me but juuust out of reach he finally said to me "I just don't think you're going to be able to drive a manual car."

He said this knowing full well that I had already bought a manual car cause I didn't expect to be 'learning' for so long.

He wrecked my confidence in driving and it took me another 6 months to try again, my new instructor then had to correct all the bad habits the first guy had taught me, he had no issue with my use of gears at all and I passed first attempt.

F*ck you, Nick.

SparkleFart9000

This plumber fail.

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A plumber in the middle of a job that had to drive back to the shop to get a part that was pretty basic.

And then charged for the time it took to do that.

And then installed it incorrectly.

And then returned a week later to fix the mistake and asked what idiot installed it that way.

And then installed it wrong an entirely new way.

Dadbodyy

What? You have abdominal pain? Don't use your abdomen, then.

"You're more likely to be hit by a bus than have that happen again. I'm not going to investigate, or refer you anywhere."

A doctor, regarding my irregular crippling abdomen pains.

cannedtunainbrine

Come on, doc, you're not helping your cause.

'Some people like me, some don't.'

This was a boast from a doctor I saw when I injured my shoulder and he said it was all in my head.

boys3y

What year is it again?

I went to my GP to get a prescription for birth control. I suggested an IUD may be something I want because I'm very forgetful and pills did not work out in the past.

She refused to prescribe an IUD because I was a virgin and she didn't want to "take my virginity away" by inserting an IUD... Currently looking for a new GP.

BurgundyBurnout

Teacher is obviously miserable.

When I was a teenager in high school I really wanted to apply for an astronomy camp program that summer, and you needed a letter of recommendation from a math or science teacher. My higher grade was in chemistry so I asked her- she said she would, but be aware that she'd have to say I don't always focus on my work as I should. I said fine-that was true- worked really hard on the rest of the application, and got in! Ran to school in excitement to thank my teacher for her letter, and she couldn't hide her look of utter astonishment and I realized what was up.

A few months later when at that camp I nonchalantly asked the director "she wrote me a bad letter, didn't she?" He immediately pulled me aside to say yes, it was so bad that it was a full page saying terrible things about my character and scholarship, so he knew to discount it but wanted to let me know. Which was in fact good to know, because I had AP Chemistry with her the next year and she kept doing stuff like getting me sent to the principal's office for a B- at the quarter.

That still bothers me a bit to this day. I was your classic bright but bored kid and was obsessed with astronomy, and any educator worth their salt knows a kid who can't get good grades in chemistry class can thrive at a summer program. If she didn't want to write me a letter, one can just say no. But spending all that time writing a bad one? Pretty low thing to do to a teenager.

Edit: as some are asking, I am actually an astronomer today! F*ck that teacher! :) And am still in touch with the camp director today and even work as a counselor some years when my schedule allows it.

Edit 2: As many are saying, if you ever need to ask for a recommendation letter it's best to meet in person, and ask the teacher/prof for a "strong recommendation letter" and see their reaction. I will however point out that I was 15 at the time of this incident and had never asked for a letter before, and do not think teenagers are known for getting that level of subtlety.

Edit 3: The same year I graduated, said teacher moved to New Jersey. I don't know where, and she had a very generic name, so no I can't contact her or her employer. And I've no reason to believe she isn't still teaching students today. :(

Andromeda321

Remember when Trump stared at the solar eclipse?

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"You don't need shaded safety glasses" as I was staring in to a 2500 degree furnace.

Edit: I spend all day making jokes on Reddit and this is my highest rated comment.

SuburbanSwine

We're all self-conscious about something, and it doesn't help when our faults get thrown in our faces. You don't want doctors hinting that something is "weird down there," nor do you want someone to tell you you're balding. WE KNOW.

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Fox News, @hewster1369/Twitter

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Hmmmm, I don't think THAT'S your essay....

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When you know your kids backwards and forwards, this is the best tool in your arsenal.

Getting our kids to listen to us is not always the easiest of tasks. They're willful and stubborn, but we've got a mighty weapon they are rarely prepared for: reverse psychology. Getting them to convince themselves to want to do something against their own initial intentions takes some work and a whole lot of creativity, but a little sneaky manipulation goes a long way. Here are some clever parents' tricks that are definitely worth taking notes on.

Redditor u/LeanderD Asks:

Parents of reddit, what's your best example of reversed psychology on your kids that actually worked?

He Floated His Idea Through A Back Channel

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Wanted to name my boat. Anything I would think of was dismissed as stupid by my 13 year old son. After deciding on a name, I confided to a male friend my son liked. Made my friend suggest the name as though it was his idea. My son thought the name was perfect. Done.

calypsodweller

We Always Want What We Can't Have

One of my best friends through childhood used to be punished with no salad if she misbehaved. She cherishes salad now and would always try to eat as much as possible during school lunch. Coincidentally, her now husband used to be punished with no books, it had the same effect. I think it's hilarious that they'd be hitting the salad bar and library like some black market their narc parents couldn't reach hahaha.

cookiearthquake

A Deceit That's A Cut Above The Rest

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Don't know if this counts, but, at my high school (private, boys only) in the 1960's, they made a big deal about how long your hair was, and would occasionally order a boy to go home and "get a haircut".

I thought it was stupid, until years later, a master confided to me at a reunion that the policy was deliberate. The school figured we'd spend so much energy rebelling about hair length, that we would ignore other aspects of teenage rebellion. (Not?) Surprisingly, they were mostly right.

FrankDrakman

Damn! That's smart. Wow.

fangxx456

Oh they don't like long hair?

I'll show them. I'll grow my hair out as lon- what?! No I don't want to go "party"? I gotta try out this horse shampoo.

DankeyKang11

The Forbidden Book

Hi I was a victim,

There was a forbidden book that I was not allow to read on the shelf. My parents said I could only read it if I behave myself.

It was summer holidays and I was playing games all day (after 6 hrs of summer homework). One day I was home alone and had the opportunity to grabbed it. I read like half of it in one go. It was 5000 years of Chinese history.

Safe to say I was bamboozled.

oddstodd

Flowers Of The Queen

My parents always told me my broccoli were the flowers of the queen and that I really shouldn't eat them, or else the queen would get very upset! I, of course, ate the whole broccoli in a few seconds.

Subwoofy

I'm telling the queen and she's gonna be pissed

draculacletus

Sleeping Beauty

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I taught my kids when they were toddlers that no amount of yelling, shaking or hitting can wake a sleeping adult. The only thing that works is a gentle hug and/or a nice kiss on the cheek.

Edit: Probably needed some more details for the reverse psychology aspect to be clear. It went something like this - Step one, tell the kids I'm going to sleep and nothing they do will wake me (head buried face down is the safest position). Step two, after the initial onslaught dies down pretend to awaken on your own. Tell them you got a bit of nap left in you and nothing can wake you, especially not hugs and kisses.

DrMethusael

Holy sh*t...if my daughter woke me up like this I would buy her a pony.

All-Seeing_Elon

I am saving this comment because this will save lives if I ever have kids, stg.

smerter

A Walk In Someone Else's Shoes.

Split custody with my ex. When my son was around 10, he visited two weekends a month. I was waiting tables and didn't have a huge amount to spend, but he was so needy from divorce (and I'm not blaming him, it was ugly), he begged constantly for MORE when he was with me. Whatever more was, it didn't matter... he'd be eating ice cream cone and begging for teriyaki.

I finally realized that he just felt empty, and getting MORE whatever from me wasn't filling him up. His next visit I handed him $100 in cash and told him it was our food/fun budget for 3 days and two nights, and he was in charge of it. I bought him his own wallet to carry. We figured out how many times we were going to eat and what we were going to do, and he paid. He got to keep whatever money he had left...thought he was rich...then realized just how much everything cost. Well. Shoe on other foot then. If we had no money for food, we ate leftovers - and I didn't contribute more to pot. After a few weekends of running short or not getting something he actually wanted because he was foolish with funds, he started to really think about how to spend that money. He budgeted and kept to his budget. And a few times he actually went home with a little cash for his private stash.

Many years later, he thanked me for this. It really changed the way he thought about money and love.

Augumenti

This Is Worth Giving A Shot

Took my 3 year old son to one of those doctor's visits where he was going to get a shot. He was worried about the shot on the whole drive over, almost to the point of tears. We get to the doctor's office and a nurse subtly lets me know that my son is not just scheduled for 1 shot, but 5 of them in the same visit.

I turn to my son with an exaggerated smile and tell him, "Good news! They figured out how to take that one big shot you were going to get and instead break it up into these 5 little tiny shots so it won't hurt nearly as much!"

You could see the relief wash over his face. He stopped squirming and relaxed completely. He took the first shot and even smiled and said "It's true! The small ones don't hurt!"

We actually made it through the third shot before the effect wore off and reality kicked in. Still... I counted it as a victory.

blackbird77

Put This To The Taste

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My mom would tell me she only lets me eat soup after candy and she'd only buy me candy that i didn't like. After a few times, i stopped trying and begged her to let me eat soup first. She gave me a smirk and told me go ahead. This doesn't sound as evil as it was. But trust me i suffered.

turkeypr0

So what was the candy?

Poster_Main

Mint chocolate, raisins, stuff like that. I still hate them to this day. Who the f--- thought while eating chocolate "hmm id like some tooth paste with this."

turkeypr0

This is Truckin' Awesome

Mum had sworn a bit around the house.

When 4, while out at the supermarket, I said F word really loudly.

Very quickly and intently, she asked if I had just said "Truck" and said that was a bad word and not to ever say Truck like that again.

I thought that was the bad word so used that when being naughty.

GodOfTheThunder

The "Silly Mom" Routine

The "Silly Mom" routine.

My kid, and a few other kids I've known, would balk at getting ready to go. I'd grab their clothes and say, "Well, if you won't put on your clothes, I guess I'll put on your clothes. Cute shirt, by the way! Does it go on my foot?"

NO!

"Does it go on my head?"

NO! IT GOES ON ME!

"Oh, that's right, thanks! So, it must go on your legs, right?"

NO!

"I just can't figure this out! Where does this adorable shirt go?"

[kid grabs shirt and puts it on] ON MY TUMMY! SILLY MOM!

"Oh, thank you so much! Now what about these pants? Shirts go on tummies, so...the pants go on the tummy, too, right?"

NO!

[continue until kids have dressed themselves]

I would also do things like hand the kid my keys and say, "Alright, you're driving, I'll sit in the booster seat in back," attempt to feed the kid by putting a spoon up to his ear or his belly button, and attempt to put away his toys in the refrigerator.

insertcaffeine

Some Foot For Thought.

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My mum would always yell at us "if you don't do X, you have to go to bed without socks!"

I never wore socks anyway, and I'm ashamed to admit that this worked.

Splittsky

That would work really well on my son, or make him cry for a really long time... He's 3 and over the last few weeks has decided that he is fully unable to sleep without socks on.

PJQueen

Toddlers man. Completely unpredictable.

SheaRVA

I'm Greens With Envy

My mum had a friend that would put vegetables on her own plate and not the kids.

When the kids asked she would be reluctant to share, "that's grown up food. But I suppose I can let you have a little."

Her kids grew up loving vegetables.

I sat at the dinner table for 3 hours staring at the yucky cauliflower I refused to eat.

laik72

This reminds me of an instance when my child convinced my wife and myself to change our plans for dinner. We were in a grocery store to pick up something quick and easy to eat that we wouldn't have to prepare. Our daughter, wanted none of that, she demanded that she wanted a salad from the salad bar. We started to argue back, but then realized: "Our child demands that we feed her vegetables for dinner instead of a microwaved meal, why are we saying 'No?'"

We had salad for dinner that night.

Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

The Power Of Choice

I don't so much know if you would call it reverse psychology, but I didn't realize it until my dad told me this.

When there were chores that needed doing, he noticed if he asked me to mow the lawn, I would complain and procrastinate. But if he asked would I rather mow the lawn or wash the windows, I'd pick one and just get it done.

Shattered my brain when he told me when I was in my twenties. I use it when I'm coaching or baby sitting all the time and it almost never fails.

AppealToReason16

The Boy Who Cried 'Ouch'

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I've done this one with tens of kids. Any time a kid gets "hurt" (falls down on grass, gets gently hit in the face with a ball, etc.) instead of stopping the activity to pick the kid up and see if they're ok you just scoot them off to the side and resume. Within 10 seconds of not getting all the attention and seeing the fun is resuming they pop right back up and are magically healed.

This of course is only for the "injuries" that aren't actually injuries.

pedanticProgramer

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