oh-myyy-ribbon
Weird News

Massive Blaze Causes Firefighter To Dodge Semen Explosions At Bull Artificial Insemination Facility

Yann Guichaoua-Photos / Getty Images

As bad as your day can get, I can assure you someone has it worse. And Tuesday morning, Australian firefighters had it the absolute worst.

A fire broke out at the Yarram Herd Services, a genetics laboratory in Gippsland, Victoria. As firefighters tried to fight the fire, the fire fought back.


How often do you get to see a headline like this?

Now, before we get into all the fun this headline promises, it is important to point out the kind of danger these firefighters were in.

Country Fire Authority Gippsland commander Chris Lowschenkohl told ABC (Australian Broadcasting Corporation) News,

"So firefighters went into a defensive mode initially to protect themselves, because there were also LPG cylinders at the neighboring property, and they did a magnificent job."

LPG stands for liquefied petroleum gas. If the fire wasn't contained, it would have been possible for it to spread to that facility and cause untold destruction.

These firefighters did an important job and should be congratulated.

And now that all of that is out of the way: Holy moly!

Did you see that headline?




Yarram Herd Services provides breeding advice, genetic testing and artificial insemination services for the local farmers. Their facility housed around 100 cryogenic cylinders full of semen for such purposes.

Those containers were well sealed, but the fire was heating them up. The contents inside expanded from the heat, and made the tops pop off, launching the contents out like a projectile.

Firefighters had to dodge missiles made of semen while putting out a dangerous fire that had the possibility of setting off even more massive explosions.

This is the best movie idea ever.




Now, this isn't all fun and games. This was the livelihood of a lot of people.

Yarram Herd Services will have a lot to recover from here, but the cylinders alone were valued between $500 and $1000 AUD, excluding the, um... contents.

Aaron Thomas, Vice Chairman of the Yarram Herd Services Committee said,

"We're coming into the AI [Artificial Insemination] season so there would have been substantial amounts of semen inside the tanks that we've lost, which was owned by our local farmers, and it can range in value from $5 per straw to $95 per straw."

I want to stress that this is a terrible loss for the local farmers. They're already dealing with the effects of a drought that's making them lose up to 70 percent of their regular income and this is just making things worse.

But I would be remiss in my job if I didn't mention how Aaron Thomas, Vice Chairman of the Yarram Herd Services Committee, described this effect on those farmers.

"It's going to be a huge blow, especially for our farmers."

And I'm spent.




Bulls aren't alone in the quest for perfect breeding. The book The Genius Factory: The Curious History of the Nobel Prize Sperm Bank, available here, tells the story of a more human effort.

********

Listen to the first four episodes of George Takei's podcast, 'Oh Myyy Pod!' where we explore the racially charged videos that have taken the internet by storm.

Be sure to subscribe here and never miss an episode.

Anything dangerous or any foolish act you can think of has already been done by someone out there on the internet.

And I mean ANYTHING.

Keep reading... Show less

@arlenedegaf/Twitter

A White civilian faked being a police officer in order to berate a group of Hispanic teenagers enjoying a swing set in a public, all-ages park, in Fort Worth, Texas.

One of the teens recorded the confrontation on a smartphone and posted the footage online.

Keep reading... Show less

Being in the service industry is an incredibly difficult career. It is not for the lazy or faint of heart. In fact it has been scientifically proven that it takes an emotional toll on the soul, the body and most especially the mind. So what could possibly make a server reject the coin they are working for?

Keep reading... Show less

If you've ever worked with kids you know that their honesty and lack of filter can sometimes make them cringeworthy - and pretty hilarious.

If you haven't (or you don't have a thick skin) then you might not be able to appreciate just how funny kids can actually be. For those who can, this article should be a blast.

Reddit user moosepajamas asked:

Teachers of Reddit, what is the funniest thing you've ever heard a student say?

The answers could sometimes be insulting, sometimes silly, and sometimes downright baffling - just like kids themselves!


September 31

Giphy

One time I was asking students their birthdays. One boy told me that his birthday was September 31st. I tried to explain that this was not possible, but he insisted. Later, I looked it up. I then informed him that his birthday was November 17th.

He looked at me kind of confused and said "ohhhh." Then his face brightened and he said, "Well, last year I KNOW it was September 31st!"

- RedditStateOfMind

Jesus

I teach elementary band. One time we were preparing for a challenging playing test and a student said: "Man, I need to practice."

Without missing a beat the kid next to him says "My mom says I need Jesus."

- moosepajamas

Shown Up By A 5th Grader

Giphy

Was tutoring after-school a couple years ago. A kid asked "What time is it?"

I joked "Time for you to get a watch."

He responded "Time for you to get a new joke" without a moment's hesitation.

I had to laugh at getting shown up by a 5th grader. Two reading levels behind but witty as hell.

- Garlic_And_Sapphires

Jogathon

I had a student who was a newcomer (just moved to the US, almost no English) from Latvia. This kid is very bright and was one of my favorite 6th graders ever. We were having our annual jogathon, which is linguistically and culturally not translatable from Latvian.

Student: "So I pay you and you make me run?"

Me: "Yeah, that's actually how it goes."

Student: "This is simple. I don't pay you, you don't make me run."

Me: "uhhhh...."

- estrogyn

Rosa

Middle school field trip to a different state. One of the chaperones (a large black woman) wanted to get in a little nap in the back seat of the bus, so she made one of the students move to a seat in the front that was far from his friends. He got in the seat and started sulking. He was normally a pretty lively kid, so I leaned forward and asked what happened.

To which he replied: "I think I just got reverse Rosa Parks-ed!"

- almost_queen

The Moon

Giphy

I teach sophomores. One day, this girl was sitting at her desk, looking very concerned, and obviously wanted to ask me something. Finally, she blurted out, "Did anybody else see the moon in the sky during lunch? It's supposed to be out at night, something is wrong!"

- cubfanbybirth

Physically

Teacher to student: "Were you in class yesterday?"

Student, sounding more lost than anything and probably answering too honestly: "Physically... ?"

It wasn't so much an attempt at humor as just the summation of how we all felt in that class, one of those "it's funny because it's too true" things... we all were showing up, we were all sitting in the class physically... but being there? That was another question...

- Allisade

The Ladies

First grade. 6 yr. old lil dude about 3 ft. tall and 80 lbs. walks in late from recess.

Me - "Why are you late?"

Kid - grabs his hunk of belly with both hands like a ball of cream cheese and says "The ladies love this!"

Sits down like nothing happen with no smile.

- BoBoShaws

Synchronized

Giphy

He asked me "If a synchronized swimmer starts drowning, do they all start drowning?"

I lost it in class.

- bunsenbernerr

It's A Miracle

I teach high school, and one of my sophomores referred to merry-go-rounds as "miracle rounds". He legit thought that's what they were called 😂😂 I corrected him and he refused to believe me lol.

- royalredhead

The Pizza Guy

I was sharing information about math in art to my students (they're about 13 years old) and mentioned Leonardo da Vinci. A student said: "The pizza guy?"

I was confused, but later she said, "See! The pizza party!"

We were looking at The Last Supper.

- catpflug

Astronomy

Giphy

"I thought Astronomy would be easy because I know all about it but he hasn't even brought up horoscopes yet and we're 6 weeks in."

- chrisrayn

Budget Cuts

I teach band. One day I'm working with the high school jazz band and we're going to start mapping out some basic compositions. I pass out blank sheet music for them to use, which is simply blank 5-line staves with no notes, no symbols, etc.

One kid gets his sheet music expecting it to be a new song we're going to work on, sees that it's blank, looks up and says "Wow, budget cuts must've hit us hard, huh?"

- SquirrelSanctuary

Life Choices

Math prof. I finished a proof and to check understanding, I asked "does everyone understand my choices?" One of my favorite students ever piped up and said "Are we talking about your proof or how you've chosen to live your life?"

- coldstainlessnail

Before

Giphy

Wore a Captain America shirt to school since the student council had a super hero day. A student said I looked like Captain America - before the super soldier injections.

- numero1uno

Parenting isn't always easy, but most parents recognize that their kids are going to mess up and need to be taught how to behave. Some, however, have deluded themselves into thinking that their little angel couldn't possibly misbehave or do anything wrong.

Keep reading... Show less
Laura McIntyre / Facebook

Nurses are often one of the most undervalued professionals we have. Doctors tend to get the spotlight when it comes to healing.

But in the past week, many are placing nurses and all they do in the limelight–all thanks to Laura McIntyre celebrating her twin sister Caty's dedication.

Keep reading... Show less