Donald John Trump is not a man notorious for being bound by unimportant things like facts, reality, truth... ya know, that boring stuff.
He doesn't need facts, numbers, supporting evidence, nada.
It's gotten to the point that networks have started refusing to air him live due to his "pattern of misinformation," which is a polite way of saying ya boy 45 is pretty much always:
wrong trump GIF Giphy
Mmm, there really is a gif for everything.
So his penchant for alternative facts (whether accidentally or on purpose) and his love for bragging came together in a perfect storm recently. Unless you've been hiding under a rock—which we would totally not fault you for given the current pandemic—you've probably heard that the stock market took a massive tumble in the wake of ... well ...
terrible typography GIF Giphy
The fumble was significant enough that even after a historic upswing, it still wiped out all of the gains that began in Obama's administration. Even after the biggest come-back in almost a hundred years, we're still not back at square one, that's how jacked up things got.
We could talk about the why's... about a global health crisis or denial and total mismanagement or even about illegal insider trading... but we're not economists.
All we really need to know at this point is that it fell so far so fast that the great stock market crash of 1929 suddenly didn't seem like a big scary thing outside of the realm of possibility.
Still, we should totally brag about that increase, right? It's not the choice we would have made, but it's certainly an option that exists. It also happens to be the option that Trump and the RNC went with.
First, Trump did this:
Trump brags about the stock market as an epidemic is surging in the United States and people are dying. https://t.co/fSJeCn85Ej— PoliticusUSA (@PoliticusUSA)1585087256.0
Trump could not resist bringing up the stock market and glowing about it. That is it. That is his briefing. Nothing… https://t.co/di0vobuP3z— 🌀Blue Wave🌀 (@🌀Blue Wave🌀)1585175760.0
After Trump made his comments to the press, the Republican National Committee (RNC) bragged about the historic increases on Twitter.
“Today, as you probably saw, the Dow surged over 2,100 points— it’s an all time record.” -@realDonaldTrump https://t.co/l8DXVVLFBX— GOP (@GOP)1585087838.0
The RNC—aka GOP—then tried to back up their boast with numbers.
🚨 Dow posts BIGGEST percent gain since 1933 🚨 https://t.co/ofzjcTu6lp— GOP (@GOP)1585082356.0
But they maybe kind of neglected to mention all the other stuff.
That's okay, though. Twitter is here for us, fam. See, the last time numbers were this bad the world was, essentially, a raging dumpster fire.
We were doing the Cha Cha Slide with the Great Depression and a World War. So if current numbers are matching those numbers, what does that say about the state of the world?
Apparently nothing, if you're Trump and whoever is running Republican Twitter.
Twitter is here to say it for you.
@GOP @realDonaldTrump remember how trump kept touting his amazing gains on the Dow Jones and how grown men were com… https://t.co/Bu22l9togG— Winston Smith 🆘💔💔💔 (@Winston Smith 🆘💔💔💔)1585101303.0
@GOP @realDonaldTrump After dropping 11,000 points! You're kind of terrible at this.— SUN (@SUN)1585087939.0
@GOP Me: gains 500 lbs Me: loses 30 lbs Me: “wow pretty tremendous weight loss, I’m in good shape!”— Brendel (@Brendel)1585090014.0
@GOP @realDonaldTrump It’s still a disaster... almost 10,000 points lower. The fastest drop in history. https://t.co/iCGo83vwY9— dolfr (@dolfr)1585088655.0
The good news: The Dow went up by 11.37% today, which is the fifth biggest percentage gain in its entire history.… https://t.co/r2qebyIT5O— Kevin M. Kruse (@Kevin M. Kruse)1585080513.0
@GOP In 1933, about 30% of Americans were unemployed, nearly half of the banks had failed, and it took WWII to pull… https://t.co/yuXLC1CzRd— Devin Nunes’ cow 🐮 (@Devin Nunes’ cow 🐮)1585094434.0
@GOP This is called directionless volatility, and it's an indicator that the economy is broken.— Schrödinger's Trump: $775 per person per night (@Schrödinger's Trump: $775 per person per night)1585085346.0
@GOP @realDonaldTrump So now I’ve only lost 38% of my 401k instead of 42%— Degenerate Gentleman (@Degenerate Gentleman)1585088424.0
Facts. Gotta love 'em.