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Of course, such crimes rarely succeed in real life.
Mainly because the perpetrators always leave one fatal clue or make one fatal mistake that results in their crime being a little less than perfect.
Thus finding themselves behind bars, and not on the beaches of the Cayman Islands as planned.
Redditor sadieisnotsad was eager to learn about some of the juiciest "near-perfect" crimes, leading them to ask:
"What criminal committed an almost perfect crime and what was the thing that messed it up?"
A House Is Not A Home...
"Salim Kara, who single-handedly stole 2.3 million in coins, one by one."
"He kept a low profile for 13 years, but blew it by buying a 1 million dollar house in the early 90s."- invisibo
Caught On The Strap!
"The Dunbar Armored robbery: the largest cash heist in US history."
"A 6-man inside job to rob an armored cash depot."
"They set up a house party as an alibi, used the keys to get into the cafeteria, and waited in there until all employees came in on the break, then ambushed and subdued them without firing a shot or raising the alarm."
"They then loaded the money bags (with over $18 million) into a haul, destroyed the CCTV tapes, and returned to the party."
"Then they sat on the money for six months before hiring a crooked lawyer to set up a real estate money laundering scheme to avoid suspicion."
"2 years after the robbery, one of the men paid a real estate broker with a stack of money still wrapped in the original currency strap."
"The broker immediately reported it to the Police."
"After being arrested, he cracked under interrogation, confessed to the robbery, and ratted out his partners."
"All the men have since finished their prison sentences, and most of the money was never found, so there’s a chance they still won in the end."- Cringelord_420_69
No Criminal Should Think The Law Is On Their Side...
"John George Haigh killed up to six people between 1944 and 1949 and then disposed of their bodies...
"He would then fraudulently sell their assets, properties, etc., and pocket the cash."
"His workshop contained no drainage, so he simply poured the remains on a pile of rubble."
"His last victim, an elderly victim disappeared, and two days later, he accompanied the victim's friend to the police station, where police discovered his history of fraud."
"At his workshop, the police found papers concerning his earlier victims, and dry cleaning, jewelry tickets for his last victim."
"A pathologist examining the human remains found parts of a pelvis, gall stones, and dentures on the rubble."
"Haigh then claimed he had killed his last victim, destroying the body in acid, and completely misunderstanding the legal term of corpus delicti, claimed that he could not be charged as there was no body to determine a crime had taken place."
"The man went to the gallows."- NightLamplighter
Let Me Out Television GIF by GritTVGiphy
He Thought No One Would Notice
"That one dude who robbed a bank by hiring a bunch of people from Craigslist to show up wearing the same outfit he was and wait outside, he would’ve gotten away, but a homeless man saw him do a practice run the day before and after the robbery told the police."- deadlythegrimgecko
Let's Hope That Sandwich Was Good!
"The Antwerp Diamond Heist, the perfect heist-of-the-century where an Italian gang stole 100 million in gems."
"While leaving Antwerp, they disposed of the disguises and the tools used, but one member of the gang was too lazy to burn everything as instructed."
"Among the rubbish, the police found envelopes of the Antwerp Diamond Centre and a receipt for a sandwich bought at a store close to the Centre."
"They recovered video footage of the sandwich store and busted the mastermind of the heist, who didn't give up his mates (but some were later identified)."
"Some of the stolen diamonds are still unaccounted for."- Vandirac
Overheard...
"Robert Durst."
"He was caught while being interviewed for an HBO series, to which he initially agreed on to clear his name."
"Went to the bathroom and mumbled to microphone (which he thought was off) 'What the hell did I do? Kill all of them, of course."
"This was later presented to the court as evidence."
"You can still watch it on HBO."- pleasedonttellmethat
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An Artist Ahead Of His Time...
"Wolfgang Beltracchi, he made millions with forged paintings he painted all himself."
"He was ultimately caught because he once accidentally used paint that contained a very slight amount of a substance that wasn't used in the days of the 'original' painter."- schlorpsblorps
Cleaning Fees Were The Least Of Their Problems...
"The United California Bank robbery of 1972."
"The six perpetrators had rented a vacation home to use as a base and cleaned it top to bottom before leaving."
"Except they forgot to start the dishwasher before they left, and police were able to match all of their fingerprints off the dirty dishes."- weirdoldhobo1978
Delete As You Go...
"That Australian kid who hacked the FBI and put his photos on their website."
"He scrubbed the metadata from the photo so it wouldn’t show the GPS location, then he accidentally uploaded the original with that information still on it."- DigNitty
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Treat Your Employees Well...
"I worked in the federal prison system."
"Met a Man in his mid-30s who was serving time for a series of bank robberies."
"His arrest was a complete surprise in his area."
"Model citizen."
"Married, young kids."
"Volunteered and gave generously to his kid's school."
"His bank robberies were intricately planned and well timed."
"One of his underlings decided to open up his own bank robbing business."
"He wasn't as smart and ratted out our man when he was caught, as part of his plea deal."- Eleo4756
Nowhere To Park Your Ferrari In Prison!
"Knightsbridge Robbery."
"The boss of the gang cut himself while breaking into the lock boxes and -in the dark- found out too late, there was blood all around the place, too much to clean up."
"He nevertheless managed to get away with $60M and hide somewhere in South America, but at some point decided to go back to England to retrieve his Ferrari, being arrested in the process."- Vandirac
Keep It In Your Pants!
"I work in downtown Chicago."
"Last year, one guy robbed the Fifth Third Bank across the street."
"He escaped into the Ogilvie Transportation Center and disappeared into the night despite it being so crowded and busy."
"Got away with the money and everything."
"Until three weeks later, when a woman recognized him as having flirted with her RIGHT BEFORE he robbed the bank and had given her his PHONE NUMBER."
"She handed that over to the authorities, and he was successfully caught."
"Bro, he was SO CLOSE to getting away with it."- Shushh
Call Me Animation GIF by Holler StudiosGiphy
There's A Reason People Aren't Convinced About Crypto...
"I knew a guy who got into selling drugs on the dark web."
"He had this setup where he’d buy the drugs and package them in his room, ship them through USPS, and collect money through cryptocurrency."
"He made a lot of money, went on for a while without being caught, they even found fictionalized accounts he wrote about how he was able to do this, including driving 50 miles to make drops."
"He was caught when an employee noticed he was handling large numbers of small envelopes while wearing latex gloves and reported it."
"He probably would have gotten away with it if he’d worn winter gloves over the latex."- prototype137
Why Having A Throwaway Account Is Helpful...
"The guy who created the Silk Road gave himself away by initially introducing the Silk Road to the world from an email address that would ultimately lead investigators right to him."- permutation212
One Crime Reveals Another...
"There's the story of Daniel Rigmaiden."
"He was a scam artist who defrauded the government out of hundreds of thousands in tax money."
"He was eventually caught, but was so confident that his methods of avoiding capture were thorough that he thought law enforcement had to have been 'cheating' in some way, abusing power."
"When caught, he turned whistleblower."
"This kid was smart."
"Per documentary IMDB - he evades the FBI for months."
"Once captured, He uses his time, then in prison, to investigate."
"His obsessive search for the truth leads to a groundbreaking discovery: law enforcement used a secret technology called a Stingray to intercept his phone calls and personal information, as well as those of millions of unsuspecting Americans."
"He takes his discovery public, and the revelation not only carries implications for his case but also for the fate of the Fourth Amendment."
"The stingrays are cell 'site simulators' or 'IMSI catchers', invasive cell phone surveillance devices that mimic cell phone towers and send out signals to trick cell phones in the area into transmitting their locations and identifying information."
"When used to track a suspect's cell phone, they also gather information about the phones of countless bystanders who happen to be nearby, as a law enforcement can literally drive down any block with one turned on, having it connect to every single mobile device as it moves down the street."
"Mobile cell towers, essentially gathering your information without your knowledge."- CastorrTroyyy
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It takes a lot of gumption to think you can get away with a major crime.
It takes even more to actually get away with it.
Do you have any near-perfect crime stories? Let us know in the comments below.