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Medical Professionals Share Their 'You Should Never Be A Parent' Stories

Medical staff member walking down hallway with incubator
Hush Naidoo Jade Photography/Unsplash

Reddit user Trippy_Cornflakes asked: 'Employees of Maternity Wards (OBGYNs, Midwives, Nurses, etc): What is the worst case of "you shouldn't be a parent" you have seen?'

Medical professionals have seen it all.

They have witnessed patients and concerned loved ones at their worst and their best depending on a myriad of traumatic scenarios in hospitals.


People tend to show their true colors during a stressful time, and bad behavior is typically attributed to fear.

Some of these can be demonstrated by parents, which prompted Redditor Trippy_Cornflakeslakes to inquire:

"Employees of Maternity Wards (OBGYNs, Midwives, Nurses, etc): What is the worst case of 'you shouldn't be a parent' you have seen?

Warning: Many of these examples are of sexual assault.

Delivery To Foster Care

"My wife and I did foster care. We took in a 4 month old girl, and had her for over a year and then were offered the opportunity to adopt after parental rights were terminated. You don't bond with a baby and then break that bond, so we started the adoption process."

"Close to completion, bio egg donor and bio sperm donor had another, who was immediately taken by CPS. The little guy spent his first two months in NICU with a brain bleed and drug detox."

"And we now had a choice... adopt them both, or back out. They were to be a matched set. There may be more, but they would be after our case was closed and sealed. They were bad enough that any further children born to them would be immediately taken by CPS."

"I'm now the proud dad of thriving 10 and 12-year-olds."

– No_Tailor_787

Troublesome Father

"I volunteer in a NICU. Recently a 'dad' who refused to be on the birth certificate started arguing and being a d*ck. The baby was sleeping, and he woke it up."

"The nurse said he handled the baby roughly. They ended up having to ban him from the NICU. CPS was involved already and hopefully they continue to be."

– trashcanpam

Substance abusers never seem to understand why they are unfit for parenthood.

Clueless

"Emergency Department, we have a regular patient. She has had 8 kids taken away. She said she is going to keep having them until she gets to keep one."

– bonlow87

Poor Child

"On my nursing L&D clinical, I was able to spend a shift in the NICU. One of the babies was the mother's fifth child, he was born addicted to meth and was positive for syphilis. The other four children are wards of the state. It made me so incredibly sad and mad for this baby."

– ThatKaleidoscope8736

Delusional

"I have a cousin who has a history of meth use. Her son just turned one and has been adopted by my uncle and his wife. She posts on social media all the time as if she’s with the baby all the time. Poor kiddo."

– ZweitenMal

"My cousin was the same, but heroin. Too much trauma, not enough help, not soon enough. Self-medication to addiction, trying to get sober, and wanting her own family, but then the trauma comes back, and so does the addiction, and then the kid gets taken, and it's all even worse."

"Kept trying to replace what she lost, judgment too clouded from trauma and the drugs. She died at 36 from heart failure. 4 kids, 3 adopted by her siblings and one adopted as a baby to a decent family."

"The drugs didn't cause her problems tho. Her getting kicked out to live with her addict Mom at 16 when my uncle got married was probably the catalyst."

"If I hate anyone, it's my uncle. Her and her older brother both got addicted to heroin, for years. He was just able to move out sooner and got help sooner. She got left behind. People suck."

– ThatKinkLady

People are often too quick to make judgments about victims of sexual assault.

Still A Child

"My OB told me the story of his saddest delivery - he delivered a baby of a 12-year-old girl. On one of the postpartum rounds, when he went in to check on her, she was asleep and was sucking her thumb."

– JulianneW

The Classmate

"I knew a girl who had babies in eighth grade, sophomore year, and what would have been her senior year if she hadn’t dropped out. She was at my bus stop while she was pregnant the second time, and I was a sh*tty judgmental 14-year-old to her. I can’t even imagine how hard her life was. Her younger brother got a girl pregnant around 16 and dropped out too :/"

– lucythelumberjack

Too Close To Home

"F'k I have a 12 year old son and he is still such a child still. His bedtime is 9 pm, and he needs to be reminded to bring his homework back to school. He still isn’t allowed to stay home by himself overnight."

"I know we baby him a bit, but he’s not even a teenager yet. He would have no idea what to do with a baby. Whoever hurt that little girl deserves the absolute worst. My heart breaks for both of those poor babies."

– kennedar_1984

These examples of trauma concerning premature parenting and patients with a history of drug abuse are an unfortunate reality that medical experts too often witness. The occupational hazard is not one many of us can stomach.

The ultimate tragedy lies in the fact that some of these victims of violent circumstances are sadly getting neglected at a time when the current system seems unconcerned about their well-being, and medical professionals face legal ramifications for providing necessary care.

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