Is one condiment not good enough for you?
Do you need to mix something creamy with something tomatoey and sugary in order to hit your dinnertime urges?
Well then do we have good news for you.
Heinz, the brand behind everybody's favorite ketchup, is coming out with an invention that plays god even more than their scary colorful ketchup did.
In case you forgot:
Omg, Remember When Heinz Had That Colorful Ketchup ?? I Had The Green Ketchup. http://t.co/KnMvtnIN— Shanice✞Kapeesh (@Shanice✞Kapeesh) 1324686646.0
Throwback to when Heinz thought it was a good idea to make colorful ketchup 😂 http://t.co/EAYZk0VZml— 𝙂𝙖𝙗𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙚 • 𝙍𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙤𝙚𝙝𝙡 (@𝙂𝙖𝙗𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙚 • 𝙍𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙤𝙚𝙝𝙡) 1424405937.0
REMEMBER THIS: Heinz EZ Squirt Ketchup https://t.co/Uff3xGHl9A https://t.co/LayF3a6i6t— samadrobinson.com (@samadrobinson.com) 1554395948.0
It blinds me!
Well, get ready for the late 2010s version of this ridiculousness.
Behold, the Kranch:
Kranch sauce is here! Reply with #KlaimMyKranch and #Sweeps and we might just give you one of the first 100 bottles… https://t.co/BwWFuDnQFA— Heinz Ketchup (@Heinz Ketchup) 1554292887.0
What a name. A name only a mad ketchup scientist would love.
Kranch, of course, is a combination of ketchup and ranch dressing.
Following the Mayochup/-must/-cue (combinations of mayo and ketchup, mayo and mustard, and mayo and barbecue sauce), this is the newest sauce sure to make fry lovers drool.
Or....have we gone too far this time.
@HeinzKetchup_US (Hidden Valley Ranch HQ calling Heinz) https://t.co/8RtH2k6Agw— Dusty Lee Cook™ (@Dusty Lee Cook™) 1554294382.0
@HeinzKetchup_US https://t.co/JjKlNmhH1Z— Sarah Vander Wagen (@Sarah Vander Wagen) 1554323278.0
@HeinzKetchup_US God was right to abandon this place.— coreyspring (@coreyspring) 1554381902.0
@HeinzKetchup_US pls dont hurt me— dylan (@dylan) 1554431576.0
@HeinzKetchup_US #KlaimMyKranch #Sweeps @80ProofRN I TOLD YOU BOIIIIIII. KETCHUP AND RANCH IS LIT SON!— Richard L. Mendez (@Richard L. Mendez) 1554296173.0
The Takeout says Heinz is drunk with power.
"Perhaps delirious from their own success, the minds at Heinz that brought us Mayochup and its subsequent descendants have once again tested the boundaries of condiment crossbreeding. Somewhere, hidden deep amongst the catacombs of Heinz headquarters, these mad food scientists give free rein to even the basest of instincts, unchecked, ungoverned by the tenets of civilized society. And lo, what they have wrought."
@HeinzKetchup_US Ranch dressing is the most overrated condiment in America.— Cory Hughey (@Cory Hughey) 1554383110.0
@HeinzKetchup_US https://t.co/jUbYKZxLol— Miles Klee (@Miles Klee) 1554397090.0
@HeinzKetchup_US FFS Heinz— Between The Hodges (@Between The Hodges) 1554375512.0
@HeinzKetchup_US i hate capitalism but no one loves ranch and ketchup more than me #klaimmykranch #sweeps— claire 🦠 (@claire 🦠) 1554386470.0
@HeinzKetchup_US It sounds gross but I want to try it! #KlaimMyKranch #Sweeps— Emily Zahner (@Emily Zahner) 1554340023.0
@HeinzKetchup_US At least the product marketing folks were smart enough not to call it “Retchup” 🤷🏻♂️— Nate Ptacek (@Nate Ptacek) 1554393751.0
"When we launched Mayochup, Mayomust, and Mayocue, our fans speculated on social media what they thought the next condiment mashup should be—the tweets were pouring in!" Dalia Adler, Associate Director of Marketing for Heinz, said in a statement, according to Delish.
"Inspired by our fans' ideas, our new Kranch sauce is a blend of ketchup and ranch that will completely change your condiment game this summer."
@HeinzKetchup_US Great name. Really. Truly an outstanding name. I can attest to it. I've had it my whole life! (I… https://t.co/eH2kPx5K0Q— Jordan Cranch (@Jordan Cranch) 1554315864.0
@HeinzKetchup_US I have been doing this for YEARS!! IT’S TIME! #KlaimMyKranch #Sweeps— Holly O'Connor (@Holly O'Connor) 1554452393.0
@HeinzKetchup_US https://t.co/zrRBhzXjJT— Niko (@Niko) 1554425863.0
@HeinzKetchup_US you're tossing out Ketchup and Ranch but couldn't even make blue ketchup... - @ImTyJordan— Power97 (@Power97) 1554408970.0
@HeinzKetchup_US Pure Evil— Over Macho Grande (@Over Macho Grande) 1554407012.0
Heinz is giving away free bottles of Kranch to random tweeters who use the hashtag #KlaimMyKranch, which strangely enough was not thought up by the same people who wrote the Mortal Kombat games.
@HeinzKetchup_US #KlaimMyKranch #sweeps Change my mind but this might be kinda gross— Jerad🌍☄💖® (@Jerad🌍☄💖®) 1554398885.0
@HeinzKetchup_US Excuse me, you’re two days late for #AprilFools— Matthew Smith (@Matthew Smith) 1554397661.0
@HeinzKetchup_US Never— Jon "awards jury" Hilburg (@Jon "awards jury" Hilburg) 1554397278.0
@racheeei @HeinzKetchup_US https://t.co/QOe1WT61Vj— Lucy Lucy Apple Juice (@Lucy Lucy Apple Juice) 1554386135.0
We are looking forward to this release. If nothing else, to prove that we have gone too far as a species.