Pregnancy may be the miracle of life, but it puts the human body through Hell.
So what happens when a woman's body doesn't snap back to how she looked prior to pregnancy? And is her husband liable for repairing any residual effects?
A man is wondering exactly that after a dispute with his ex-wife. Not sure he did the right thing, he turned to the "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) subReddit for feedback.
Redditor Mean-Froyo730 asked:
"AITA for refusing to pay for my ex-wife's plastic surgery?"
The Original Poster (OP) explained:
"We were married for about six years and have three kids. She had a nice body before having kids and quickly got back into shape post-pregnancy until our last son."
"People did not believe she had two kids. A lot of it was genetics, her diet and being very athletic."
"The pregnancy with our last son was a nightmare. Long story short, she went from 110 to 145."
"Her body took a lot of damage. She's 39 and can't get back into the same shape that she was 10 years ago."
"She went to a plastic surgeon for lipo and 'contouring' consult. She wants to do it and can't afford it."
"She asked me to pay 50% of everything (or $7000) since it's 'half' my fault that her body was ruined from our kids and I owe that much to her."
"She also threw in facial treatments that would smooth out her skin because her skin was ruined by the 'pregnancy hormones'."
The OP added:
"She pays me child support."
Redditors were asked to weigh in by declaring:
- NTA - Not The A**hole
- YTA - You're The A**hole
- NAH - No A**holes Here
- ESH - Everyone Sucks Here
Redditors were clear in their assessment that the OP was NTA.
"NTA. Dude if I was you I would be more inclined to offer to pay half for her therapy." ~ TigerLillyPops
"Wow, that's a stretch. Pregnancy changes ones body."
"Sometimes not in ways that we like and of course if there is something we would like to change that is always our right."
"But that cost does not fall to you! In any way shape or form, NTA." ~ Mommy2A
"Ageing changes one's body. The ex is 39, I'm her age and my body is falling apart."
"It's just a sad, cruel fact of life." ~ ohdearitsrichardiii
"Truth. I gained more weight in my mid 30s for no discernable reason than I did in my 20s when I was pregnant with both of my children."
"My 30s took a toll for sure." ~ Lilly_Kane
"And dont mention what happens early 50s. Ugh." ~ flax92
"Wrinkles smooth away and we lose weight easily... right? right?" ~ RocketQ
The responses veered into sarcasm to capture what Redditors felt was an absurd request.
"But being nearly 40 and having had 3 kids and expecting to look like you did in your 20s is totally normal." ~ Ruval
"And asking your ex who you pay child support to help pay for it because it was half his fault her body's ruined is some sound logic right there." ~ shubzy123
"Maybe she should get a loan and ask her kid to pay the instalments when they hit 5 with their birthday money." ~ ayshasmysha
"Nah, force the kid to do some labour around the house and value their unskilled work at 10 cents."
"That's how you get the kid to pay it off." ~ shubzy123
The OP provided no further edits or updates, but it sounds like his ex-wife will need to find another source of funds if she chooses to get plastic surgery.