If you've ever found yourself pondering the values of some of your friendships or sometimes feel the effort you put into them are not fairly reciprocated, you may want to take 24 seconds and watch TikToker Ana Marcks lay out her formula for validating the worth of a relationship.
Marcks, who uses the handle @anamarcks, shared in her now-viral video she uses a ratio rule to help her determine the strength of her friendships.
She explained:
"I have this new rule for friendship and it's that if I'm the one to initiate hanging out 3 times in a row, then I will not be asking them to hang out again until they ask me to do something."
You can watch it below.
A couple viewers of her video noted that it is actually very difficult for some people to initiate conversation and make plans, especially those with social anxiety.
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
And some noted that they had unknowingly been loosely following this rule for some time, with great success, too.
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
A majority of the comments, though, were in agreement with Marcks that being the one to always reach out is both exhausting and disheartening.
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
@anamarcks/TikTok
Marcks finished her video by expressing her acknowledgement of different relationship roles. However, she feels a three-to-one chance to make an effort is more than fair.
"I totally get that in any relationship between two people, usually one person is more of a planner and the other is more of a 'yeah, let's do it.'"
"But I'm putting my foot down to three times because I'm just no longer willing to be in friendships and relationships that I don't feel are reciprocated.
This is definitely something to ponder.
Jane Rosenberg
Jane Rosenberg
@arianagrande/Instagram
@arianagrande/Instagram