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Woman Explains Her Rule For Testing The Strength Of Her Friendships In Eye-Opening Viral Video

TikTok screenshots of Ana Marcks
@anamarcks/TikTok

TikToker Ana Marcks revealed she uses a 3:1 outreach ratio to determine if a friend is worth keeping.

AB Keith
By AB KeithApr 02, 2023
AB Keith
AB Keith is an educator turned roadtripper who is currently teaching virtually while touring the USA. Her dream is to visit all the national parks and create a series of nonfiction children's books about NP adventures through the eyes of her dog, Backpack Benny.
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If you've ever found yourself pondering the values of some of your friendships or sometimes feel the effort you put into them are not fairly reciprocated, you may want to take 24 seconds and watch TikToker Ana Marcks lay out her formula for validating the worth of a relationship.

Marcks, who uses the handle @anamarcks, shared in her now-viral video she uses a ratio rule to help her determine the strength of her friendships.

She explained:

"I have this new rule for friendship and it's that if I'm the one to initiate hanging out 3 times in a row, then I will not be asking them to hang out again until they ask me to do something."

You can watch it below.

@anamarcks

New friendship rule #friendship

A couple viewers of her video noted that it is actually very difficult for some people to initiate conversation and make plans, especially those with social anxiety.

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

And some noted that they had unknowingly been loosely following this rule for some time, with great success, too.

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

A majority of the comments, though, were in agreement with Marcks that being the one to always reach out is both exhausting and disheartening.

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

@anamarcks/TikTok

Marcks finished her video by expressing her acknowledgement of different relationship roles. However, she feels a three-to-one chance to make an effort is more than fair.

"I totally get that in any relationship between two people, usually one person is more of a planner and the other is more of a 'yeah, let's do it.'"
"But I'm putting my foot down to three times because I'm just no longer willing to be in friendships and relationships that I don't feel are reciprocated.

This is definitely something to ponder.

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