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GOP Candidate Claims 'There Are No Pronouns' In The Constitution–And Got Instantly Fact-Checked
Lavern Spicer/Facebook

Far-right Republican Lavern Spicer, who is running for Congress in Florida, has been trying to make hay on Twitter lately by complaining about the practice of announcing one's gender pronouns.

Key word: trying.

Spicer has been in overdrive trying to mock the practice of providing one's pronouns by asserting what she thought was a smoking gun but was actually a wildly embarrassing faceplant: her bizarre claim that pronouns don't exist in the Constitution.

Of course, if you just think back to your middle school civics and social studies classes, you'll remember that a pronoun is literally the first word of the Constitution.

I mean...

Spicer tweeted simply:

"There are no pronouns in the Constitution."

Her plain-spoken confidence is pretty bold since the first phrase of the document is "We the people of the United States" and the pronouns we, he, and they all appear countless times throughout it.

Of course, we all know what Spicer was driving at--no one announced their gender markers in the Constitution, which is true enough.

But it's not like the Constitution was a personal manifesto that–had it been written in 2022–would read, "I, James Madison (he/him), in order to form a more perfect union..." It's a document written for and in the voice of a collective nation. Hence why "we" was used. Pretty simple stuff!

Announcing your gender pronouns also wasn't a thing back in 1787--nor was talking about the practice on Twitter for that matter, but that certainly hasn't stopped Spicer from bloviating on that app all day every day.

Anyway, Spicer really seems to have a bee in her bonnet about pronouns--however she defines them.

Spicer's tweet about the Constitution came after an equally absurd attempt to make the same claim about the Bible, which she subsequently deleted following blowback and replaced with a tweet clarifying that Jesus Christ never used pronouns.

But Bible verses like John 18:6 quote him as saying "I am he," and he repeatedly referred to himself as "Son of God," "Son of Man" and "King of the Jews"--all gendered phrases.

And nobody in the Bible is more hung up on their gender pronouns than God Himself--not only is God referred to as He, Him, and His throughout the book but it's also capitalized just to make sure you're absolutely clear he--sorry, He--is not a she, lest there be any confusion.

Anyway, Twitter had a field day educating Spicer about the basic rudiments of English grammar, the Constitution, and the Bible that she somehow seems to have missed.





Of course none of this even registered to Spicer, who simply cast the blowback as attacks by the "liberal mob" for "standing against their wild agenda" and then tweeted yesterday that her pronouns are "KISS MY BLACK A**"

"Wrong" and "Loud" would be more appropriate, but okay.