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The subreddit "TIFU", which is short for "Today I [Screwed] Up", sees people telling their story about how they did something innocuous that led to a lot of problems.
Reddit user _Potato_Cat_ tells her story about what happened when some coworkers showed up to her house unannounced.
Potato, as I'm going to call her (because why not?), starts off explaining her backstory. She's a good catholic girl who was introduced to BDSM and finds she enjoys it.
Which is honestly pretty great!
"This was yesterday, but I've only just figured out a way to redeem myself."
"Long story short, I had a strict Catholic upbringing, knew nothing about the big S until I met my current partner, and I'm still fairly clueless. He introduced me to bdsm and, well, turns out it's fun."
"We have a large leather collar that I wear from time to time at home, in a way it's a sort of comfort thing to me at times, (although I'm not sure why)..."
However, it's that point that wearing her collar, even when not doing the deed, feels comforting that leads to our story. Potato was wearing a "chunky" one around her house when her coworker showed up.
Who comes over without sending a text first?
"Anyway, getting back on track."
"I was wearing the chunky one yesterday whilst doing some stuff around the house, and my friend/colleague knocked on the door. She wanted to introduce me to my new colleague who would be starting from next week. (We all teach at the same place in the weekend, they I've a full time tutoring business outside of there too.)"
"I was taking to them for several minutes, even ran upstairs to grab our cat as she loves my fur babies, and then invited them inside."
As you may have noticed, she did not mention taking off the collar. You could probably have predicted that from the headline.
I have a lot of questions here. And no, one of them is not how she forgot.
While I don't personally find the feel of something around my neck comforting, I can understand that if you do, you might relax and forget it's there.
No, my first question is still, who goes over to someone's house without sending a text first‽‽
It takes three seconds!
"I was talking to them for twenty minutes before I realised what I was wearing, popped upstairs to take it off under the pretext of "telling my partner who was here" and silently died."
"Neither of them mentioned it and they were here for more than an hour, but I'm doing lesson planning with them on Wednesday and I'm still mortified. I'm going to dress myself as gothy as possible with my small choker, in the hopes of tricking them into thinking that's what I was wearing the whole time."
"TL;Dr please pray for me. I wore BDSM gear Infront of my colleague/friend when she popped over to introduce me to my new colleague. Strict Catholic upbringing has me petrified of humiliation"
You've got nothing to be humiliated about, Potato. What people do in the comfort of their own home with consenting adults is no one else's business.
And if you don't like BDSM, great! You don't have to participate. Just leave the people who do like it alone.
People had questions about this collar, and Potato was kind enough to share a photo of it.
Surprisingly, the comments were very helpful.
As some pointed out, most people wouldn't know exactly what it was unless they are familiar with the use of the collar already. And if they're familiar with the BDSM community, they likely aren't going to judge, even if they themselves don't participate.
No one posted a judging comment for the situation, and most felt it could have easily been worse.
"If it makes you feel any better... odds are they won't know what it means unless they're already familiar with the scene (in which case, they probably aren't going to judge)." - nothingbut20s
"I mean as long as it didn't say "Daddy" in big glitzy letters I think you're safe." - Quicksundown
"Mmm should've played it cool by leaving it on. Taking it off removes the benefit of the doubt." - Bletotum
"Wait...have I accidentally been wearing a BDSM collar out? I just thought it was a fun gothy necklace from Spencer's lmao" - mountainmygatess
I think a lot could be said about the culture of shame Potato was raised with. It seems that is the crux of the issue.
Potato should know, she doesn't have to be ashamed of what she enjoys. She isn't, for lack of a better phrase, hurting anyone.
If anything, this is kind of a cute story.
"This is so wholesome.
2020 and there are still people out there who are 'mortified' by their own proclivities." - kompromat_komrade
"Ha unfortunately it's a side effect of the upbringing. I'm trying really hard to overcome it, but it's not easy!" - _Potato_Cat_
So what have we learned today gang?
The life choices of others shouldn't be judged? You can leave behind your shame as you enter adulthood?
No, the real lesson we've learned, is to always send a quick text before you visit someone. Seriously, how difficult is that?