"In 5th grade..."

In 5th grade, I didn't feel like running the mile in P.E. so I told the teacher I felt sick. She knew I was full of it but she let me go to the nurse anyway. I figured I'd just lie down for the period and get sent back to class. Nurse took my temperature and it read 102, so school policy stated I had to be sent home. Got the rest of the day off to lie in bed and watch Disney Channel.

Yellhound

"I told some people..."

I told some people at my college that my nickname was "Rockin' (FirstName)." They put it in the registry and a bunch of staff started calling me that when I checked in to events or whatever, and so soon everyone called me that.

I gave myself a nickname and it stuck.

AcrolloPeed

"I was probably..."

I was probably about seven and on vacation with my family and they weren't paying any attention to me and constantly interrupting me. They were talking about someone they knew who had cows so in annoyance I point in an arbitrary direction and yell "hey a cow!" and they all go silent then I hear my dad say "oh my god your right" just as the skinniest cow emerges from behind some foliage.

arbitraryfemale

"No idea..."

At the end of 1st grade, for some reason I told my friends I was moving and wouldn't be back next year. (No idea what my reasoning was.)

Later that night a bunch of stuff went down with my (now ex) stepdad and my mom and I ended up moving states the next day.

rainamoss

 "It was not cool."

I lied I was bit by a dog, to sound cool as a 6 year old when my parents asked me about an open wound, and got rabies shots. Couple months later, I really got bit by a dog. It was not cool.

_fetaljuice

"I was sitting..."

I told my 9th grade music teacher that I played the flute.

I was sitting in my first day of advanced music class, then I thought "I'm not gonna carry this big trombone around," so I said flute.

Then I had to buy one (parents weren't happy about the uninformed swap to a brand new instrument) but I stuck through it and not only did I pass the course with a good grade, I ended up playing flute in a marching band for a few years.

Ricky_RZ

"When I was in reception..."

When I was in reception (or kindergarten for those not in the UK) I went around telling everyone that I was a hairdresser for some reason, specifically insisting that I cut and styled my own hair.. obviously no one believed me so I proceeded to cut my entire ponytail off from just behind the bobble- leaving me with a bald patch and a sort of horseshoe style gradient of hair length around it...

Holly_Willy

"45 minutes..."

I used to work at Walmart and would always be the first choice to fill in for the cart pushers when they called out. One day when we had heavy rain, I wrapped my hand up with a bandage thing and told the managers that I injured my hand, so I could not push carts (of course the cart pushers were all "sick" on the day we had heavy rain).

45 minutes into my shift I actually injured my hand. Took like 2 weeks to heal.

Stinky_doggo

"I had to write..."

I had to write a research paper, but obviously i hadn't finished it on time. So i just randomly generated some letters and numbers into a word document and sent it to the teacher. Even the school's IT guy told me that it was just bad luck and my file just got corrupted.

tontan27261

"Turns out..."

My father has glasses. I wanted glasses. Because I wanted glasses so bad, I started to pretend I couldn't see correctly. I would complain that I could never see the board correctly or when I read books the words seemed weird. I must have been extremely convincing because my mother eventually took me to the eye doctor. "Oh no" I thought. What happens when they find out I can actually see correctly? Well we go back and he takes a look behind my eyes with some medical voodoo (this was like 19 years ago) and he actually finds some weird spots back there. I then had to do the normal eye test and since I thought the jig was up, I actually tried. I failed. I left that day with a lense prescription and two years worth of eye drops.

tl;dr: Idiot younger me wanted glasses. Turns out I was seeing Minecraft graphics irl.

HirizaKyo