Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

People Divulge The Absolute Worst Excuses Their Ex Ever Gave For Cheating On Them

Couple sitting down talking
two person sitting on wood slab

It's never a good feeling to learn that your partner has been unfaithful.

Hearing this news almost instantly gets your mind racing, wondering what it was which led them to do this.

"Was I not present enough?"

"Have I let myself go?"

"Do they not love me anymore?"

If there's anything that could make you feel any worse than this sad list of possibilities, it's whenever they try to justify their behavior.

Often coming up with the most ludicrous excuses for breaking their partner's hearts, which they somehow thought might actually work or at least earn them a little sympathy.

When the only thing they likely got was an open door and a swift goodbye.


Redditor Starboy3210 was curious to hear some of the most ludicrous excuses people had to justify their infidelity, leading them to ask:
"People of Reddit, what is the dumbest reason your (ex) partner gave for cheating?"

So Much For "Till Death do Us Part".

"'You are dying! Do you really want me alone when you are dead?'"

"I was fighting cancer."

"He also told me that I was disgusting and he felt gross touching me."

"Luckily, both types of cancer are out of my life."- Mr_BigDuck

You Could Have At Least Left A Message!

"'You didn't answer your phone, was I supposed to spend Saturday night alone?'"

"I was at work, and so were you, we worked together you f*cking moron."- sixesand7s

Love At First Sight... Or Not

"She met someone that she immediately saw herself marrying."

"A month after we broke up she moved across the country, got married, called me to tell me she made a mistake, got divorced, moved back home, got pregnant and then got married again."- Zarrush

Gonna Have To Do Better Than That...

"Her response once I caught her was that she was flat-out horny."

"But after I said that’s why you have a boyfriend it was kinda funny how she went dead silent."- PuzzleheadedFarm7417

Um...

"He said that he cheated on me because I wanted to have too much sex."

"More than 5 years later I still can't find any logic in that."- Etrixie

So Much For Commitment

"'It's not like we're married'."

"Apparently I can't expect respect from someone who goes from calling me 'love of my life' to blowing her high school shag toy when he comes back to town."- FortGeek

Cartoons Button GIF by Nickelodeon Giphy

It Never Is...

“'It’s not what you think it is!'”

"After I walked in on them making out."

"While she was on his lap."

"Both without shirts."- MrSirChris

Two Whole Weeks...

"I couldn't have sex for two weeks so I could recover from surgery so she thought it wasn't cheating'."- Henchforhire

What The Actual...

"My ex-girlfriend said I forgot you were alive."

"For details, I wasn't in the military, I was at university."- Ali8ly

scared star wars GIF by Hyper RPG Giphy

That Only Makes It Worse

"It was his kid's mom so it didn't count."- kittenxx96

"In Sickness And In Health"...Oops!

“'I have needs for sex you aren’t helping me with!'"

"Said to me the day I get home from spending a week in the hospital with kidney failure (lupus)."- EndlesslyUnfinished

We Can Only "Open" Our Hearts So Much...

"Well, I know this guy that was convinced he was in an open relationship, except he forgot to let his girlfriend know.."

"She found out 7 years into the 'open relationship'."

"With multiple women, in 4 continents."

"Oh he also had a book where he'd categorize them."- ProfessionalSpite866

Episode 2 Player GIF by ABC Network Giphy

Santa? SANTA?!?!

"My serial cheater ex-once told me while in a fit of tears."

"'I can't stop cheating, I just have so many issues, my mom lied about Santa when I was a kid and it really f*cked me up'."

"'I don't think I can trust people because of it so I cheat'."- pastelflorist

No One Likes To Be Treated Like A Piece Of Meat...

“It’s like if you order the same subway sandwich for a year, eventually you’re gonna get bored of it."

"But you try another flavor and when you go back to the original one it’s better than you remembered'.”

"Felt not so good being compared to a 6 inch BLT tbh."- NucularOrchid

Oh, nothing, except commitment and fidelity...

"'She was prettier than you, what did you expect?'"

"We were engaged and had been dating for 3 years."- kathjoy

No doubt all these poor people are grateful for dodging the bullet that staying with these people would have been.

Even if it can't quite make up for the pain and embarrassment these experiences brought them.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Screenshots from @behind_da_pine's TikTok video
@behind_da_pine/TikTok

Little Girl Hilariously Figures Out How To Get Around Mom's 'No Bad Words' Rule—And We Gotta Respect It

We've all heard the advice that when you want to start a new habit, you have to give yourself time for that habit to "stick," and you also shouldn't try to take on too many new habits at once.

While the easy answer to that logic is that it would be too much change at once and too much "new" to remember, it also could take the fun out of the new practice.

Keep Reading Show less
AI-generated Christmas mural in Kingston
@mattthr.bsky.social/Bluesky

Giant AI-Generated Christmas Mural Removed After People Notice Some Truly Unhinged Details

Though many of us are worried about the prevalence of AI and its potential to take away the jobs of professional writers, artists, and designers, one truly haunted Christmas mural proves that AI is not ready to take on the responsibility just yet.

Ample theories are available for how this unhinged mural came to be, but a favorite is that an upper executive didn't want to approve an art budget for this year's mural and suggested AI instead, so a designer planned the worst option possible. Or someone turned immediately to AI, barely checked their work, and just hit the "approve" button.

Keep Reading Show less
Paramount logo on water tower; Donald Trump
Mario Tama/Getty Images; Allison Robbert/Getty Images

Someone Hacked Paramount's X Account And Brutally Changed Their Bio Over Chummy Relationship With Trump

People are simply nodding their heads after the bio on Paramount Pictures' X account was briefly changed on Tuesday following several recent incidents of the company catering to the whims and demands of President Donald Trump.

Paramount Pictures’ X account, followed by nearly 3.5 million users, was hacked at a moment of major upheaval for the company.

Keep Reading Show less
Mike and Will share a quiet moment in Stranger Things, the very PG-13 show Jeff Younger somehow insists “turns into gay porn.”
Stranger Things / Netflix

MAGA Bro Dragged After Canceling His Netflix Because Every Show 'Turns Into Gay P*rn'

Netflix streams a lot of things—superheroes, serial killers, The Great British Bake Off meltdowns—but covert gay porn is not one of them. Still, Jeff Younger insists otherwise, proudly announcing that he rage-canceled his subscription because every show “turns into gay porn.”

Bless his heart… and his search bar confusion.

Keep Reading Show less
Jenna Bush Hager and Brooke Shields
TODAY with Jenna & Friends/YouTube

Brooke Shields Has Hilarious Reaction After She's Given Awkwardly Short Chair On 'Today' Show

People who have not performed in front of a live audience might assume that adequate rehearsal time and production planning ensure things will go smoothly.

But seasoned performers will tell you that mistakes happen, no matter how well-rehearsed or fine-tuned the project is. When the mistake is obvious enough that the audience becomes aware of it, the best thing to do is laugh it off or incorporate the mistake into the program as much as possible to keep the show going.

Keep Reading Show less