COMICSANDS
percolately
georgetakei
secondnexus
george's picks
Most Read
apologize
After asking his followers to dish on something they'd done that they feel bad about, Joe opted to go first and proceeded to tell a story about his year as a bully.
In first grade, he sat next to a little boy named Dylan and every day Joe would steal Dylan's lunch off his plate and then eat it right in front of him.
First-grade Joe wasn't trying to be spiteful or exert dominance, though.
The bullying was constant, but apparently not malicious. In fact, Joe and Dylan were friends who played together daily. Joe wasn't trying to make Dylan feel bad or be mean to his friend.
Joe just really liked food.
As he explained in the story, which included a demonstration, Joe has always been a chunkier guy—even in first grade. Dylan, on the other hand, had a more slender natural build.
First-grade Joe figured that meant Dylan must not get as hungry as he did, which meant he didn't need his lunch. Being bigger, it made perfect sense to Joe he needed that food.
Thing is, first-grade Joe wasn't exactly a criminal mastermind. So his method of stealing Dylan's pizza—their usual lunch—lacked refinement and got him caught every single day.
Remember that demonstration we mentioned?
Yeah...
First-grade Joe would literally pull a "Hey look over there!" and point. Dylan would look and Joe would take Dylan's slice off of his plate and put it on top of the slice of pizza on his own plate.
Now Joe had two slices and Dylan had none.
Dylan would then tell Joe he didn't like it when Joe took his food. Joe would shrug, say something like "Sorry man, I just get hungry" and then not give the pizza back.
Instead, he would sit there and happily eat both slices while Dylan got no lunch.
Every single day. All year long. Just letting the homie go hungry.
As an adult, Joe can fully see how awful he was to Dylan and feels terrible about it. He ended the video by offering Dylan, wherever he may be, a free pizza at the most expensive pizza place he can find.
Joe figures it's the least he can do to make up for the torment. Right?
People kind of loved this and had fun messing with Joe about his horrible past.
@joe_erwin_comedy/TikTok
@joe_erwin_comedy/TikTok
@joe_erwin_comedy/TikTok
@joe_erwin_comedy/TikTok
Amazingly, with a bit of help, Joe was actually able to track Dylan down and get in touch!
Equally amazing, Dylan remembers his pizza getting stolen, but had no idea Joe was the pizza pilferer.
And the pair eventually set a date to meet up!
They don't live anywhere near each other anymore, but have settled on meeting May 14 in Kansas City.
Go ahead and set reminders in your calendar.
Pretty much everyone on TikTok has.