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loud kids
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Reddit user Pure-Signal shared the details of his own war with his "boomer" neighbor on the popular subReddit "Am I The A**hole?" (AITA):
"My wife and I bought a house a couple of years ago. It's decent-sized yard and we even have a couple of chickens (this is Los Angeles)."
"We have three boys - 6yo twins and a 9yo. They are kids. They are loud. Not screaming loud. They love playing in the yard and playing at the park literally across the street."
"My next door neighbors complain all the time about the noise level in the yard and at the park."
"They are this boomer retired couple with kids my age (mid-30's). Actually most of the neighborhood is like that because so few people especially with kids can afford a house in that area so it's a bunch of retired boomer snitches with Ring and security cameras at their front porch (no, NOTHING ever happens here) and they designated my neighbor as the block cop."
"The funny thing is that the kids are hardly home. They're in school most of the day and have sporting practices/games on the weekend."
"I tried to reason with them, but they feel that because they lived in their house for 40 years that we have to follow their rules as their next door neighbors and keep quiet. I have no sympathy for them."
"These are the people who bought their sizable home for $40,000 in the 80s and if adjusted for inflation, it's like buying the same house for $125K. But it's a house in LA so it's more like a million. My wife and I make good money, but our mortgage is astronomical. We are working much harder than our neighbors ever did."
OP's quote brings up the fact that a home costs way more these days than it did in the 80s, when boomers were buying their homes.
"Yesterday, our neighbor came to our door and complained, again, about our kids being loud. Not too loud. Just loud. At the park."
"Per the other neighbors who lived across the street from said park. Then he lectured me about my 'logic' of moving to a quiet area with loud kids."
"If that wasn't bad enough, he suggested that my wife and I look at homes by the ocean because 'you don't have neighbors to the west of you.' Houses by the ocean are like millions of dollars lol."
"I asked him how I would do that and he said that wasn't his problem. So I told him that he should move out of their house and move to the ocean where he won't have neighbors. I caught some flack for being rude to an older person, but I don't think I was."
Reddit was solidly divided on their opinions.
Some thought "everyone sucked here" (ESH), while others think OP is, in fact, the a**hole (YTA).
"It's hard to pass judgement here because who knows how loud your kids are actually being. It also sounds like everyone here is being a dick to each other. ESH"
"YTA for not parenting your kids. If the entire neighborhood is complaining, it's you, not them"
"YTA. You seem to have a problem with older people since you can't talk about them without calling them 'Boomers'."
"Secondly, if he's there neighborhood 'cop' guy, he's probably getting a lot of complaints and it's not just him. It's the whole neighborhood and most people want him to talk to you rather than they do it themselves. He's probably the bold guy."
"Third: It takes a LOT of volume to be heard from a different lot, through a wall, and possibly over interior ambient noises like a TV, to be heard by a population of people that may honestly be suffering from hearing loss to begin with."
"There is nothing wrong about defending your kids, but you are also responsible for making sure that they don't bother people around you, and clearly, they are bothering people. You KNOW your kids are being loud, so why not, you know, parent them and tell them to reel in the noise a bit?"
"They are clearly screaming if they can be heard from a park. They can absolutely learn to play and have fun without ear-splitting screaming."
"ESH. Your neighbours are probably being unreasonable but you also seem to have a big chip on your shoulder about 'boomers'. It's not their fault that house prices went crazy after they bought their house."
"ESH."
"—We are working much harder than our neighbors ever did."
"How do you know how hard they worked? You know nothing about them. The size of a mortgage has nothing to do with how hard people work. And working hard entitles you to nothing as far as your relationship with your neigbhors goes."
"—bought their sizable home for $40,000 in the 80s and if adjusted for inflation, it's like buying the same house for $125K."
"Mortgage interest rates in the 1980s were double-digit. So it's more like buying the same house for $250,000 today."
"—our mortgage is astronomical"
"So what? This has nothing to do with anything. It's not like you'd be entitled to be bad neighbors or do anything you want just because you pay a high mortgage. And that's not even what you're claiming, so the mortgage is totally irrelevant.This makes you sound like you are just upset that your neighbors happened to be born before you were."
Most people think the millennial is being unreasonable.
"Literally none of your context about how much you mortgage is or how much they bought their house for or anything else has any relevance here. The fact that you put all that stuff in to slant the discussion already indicates it's likely you're TA."
"You AITA boils down to 'multiple neighbours have repeatedly complained my kids are being too loud playing outside, AITA?'"
"So how loud are your kids really being, we don't know."
"But we do know: even you as the parent admit they are loud, so it's a fair bet that to anyone else they are ear-splitting by your own admission, you do nothing to curb this, and don't seem to think your neighbours have any right to peace and quiet in their homes at all. You admit you have no sympathy for them."
"multiple neighbours have complained to you repeatedly. And unlike your lame and cliche resentment of them for being boomers, they have no reason to hate or resent you and have all raised their own kids, so it's not like they are kid haters. If they are complaining your kids are loud, the obvious takeaway is they are too loud, or no complaint would be needed, so quit being disingenuous."
"Conclusion. It's likely your kids are extremely loud and disturbing your neighbors and you simply couldn't care less because they are boomers so screw them. In other words, YTA."
"Definitely YTA. Sounds like several people have this issue, not just 1 troublesome neighbor. Only 1 common denominator here and its you and your kids. Especially if they can hear your kids across the street inside their homes (and let's be honest their hearing may no longer be at 100%), then yes, they are way too loud."
"But even if I pretend that they weren't too loud, you are rude and dismissive of your neighbors simply due to their age. And what in the world does mortgage and "how hard they worked" have to do with your kids yelling?"
"YTA. Your attitude sucks. You think you are the only one with a huge mortgage and that they had it so easy?"
"The median income in California in 1980 was about $22,000. Median home prices in California were about $85,000 (per US Census Bureau). Don't think that these people never felt the pinch of a mortgage."
"A big rule of buying a house is to visit the neighborhood at various times during the week. That should have told you that the neighborhood was predominately older generations."
"If people can hear your kids when they're at the park from inside their homes, odds are your kids are too loud."
"ESH. He's being petty. You come off as insufferable with your 'Boomer' language. Could you manage to be any more dismissive of people? Also before someone tries to call me out. I'm 30."
"ESH The neighbour is a jerk for complaining about kids being loud, I'm sure his kids were just like it at the same age."
"You're a jerk for the way you speak down about your neighbours as if they are inferior as they didn't have to pay as much for their house as you did. Just because you are doing well for yourself doesn't mean you have to be a jerk to everyone else."
The major takeaway: the problem is being rude.
And inconsiderate.
But people can be rude from any generation. Regardless of epithet, or causation—nobody has limits to their rudeness.
Perhaps the answer is to be kind.