an Oh Myyy Property

There is always that someone we've lusted after for way too long. When suddenly they show interest, somehow it ends up all falling a part, for better or for worse.

Often, there are obvious signs that what's about to go down shouldn't be happening. If we are lucky, we catch them before anything happens that we may end up regretting.

Saying 'no' is one of the most powerful things we can do, and there is no shame in doing so. Unfortunately in these cases, the reality did not match the fantasy.

One Reddit user asked: What made you have to turn down someone you actually really wanted to have sex with?

Here is what they had to say:

Play, But Play Safely--You Are Worth It


He spent over an hour trying to convince me he didn't need to use a condom. He complained about it so much that I didn't trust him not to take it off when I was in a position not to notice.

So I told him the night was cancelled, dropped him off at his hotel (old friend driving through town), and haven't talked to him since.


Uh, I'm Pretty Sure That's Not How Your Body Works...

She said :"it's alright if you don't wash yourself for a long time, because after 3 or 4 days the body start excreting a natural soap."

Nope, nope, nope, motherf*kin' nope!


He'd Black Out, So She Backed Out


He had a girlfriend, plus I was in love with him, and he was just drunk and probably didn't even want me. Oh, and I was also a virgin. If I didn't turn it down, I'm sure for him it would be just a one time thing he'd prefer to forget once he's sober, but for me it would just break my heart.


When Friendship Comes First

She'd just broken up with her boyfriend (my friend at the time).

She made her intentions well known when she invited me over to her house in front of everyone.

I was a virgin at the time and would have loved to but I couldn't do that to a friend.


Not The Best Time To Bring Up Your Son

We were getting hot and heavy on my couch, and as I was taking off her top getting ready to have sex with her she mentioned how she couldn't wait to introduce me to her kids. I shrugged it off(I knew she was a single Mom). But, every time after that...she'd talk dirty, say something sexy, then she had to mention how I'd get along with her son. Or, she said that I could talk comic books with the boy when I came over. Yup. That killed my lust drive.


Third Time's The Charm


Same girl, 2 times. First time we were 19. I had just buried my father that day and was drinking myself into a coma. She kissed me and after a while go back to my room. I was too drunk to go through with it. For what ever reasons nothing went forward from that day. Skips a year or 2 into the future and we're both at a bar drinking. We go back to my place and we're making out. I step away to use the restroom before we start. 2min later I come back and she's already asleep in my bed topless. I get her woken up enough to put her bra back on, and then tuck her in for the evening. Again, we go dark after that for a few years.

Well, 5 years ago she's now separated from her abusive ex husband and living in the next state over. She comes to town for a week to watch her parents house while they go on vacation. Our old gang gets back together for an evening and the 2 of us are hitting it off once again. Except now we're both more mature and stay sober enough to actually go through with it. We now have 2 daughters and I can't Imagine a day without the 3 of them.


Narcissist Alert

He called me his own name during foreplay.


Preg-no, but thank you.

She was baby crazy.

Like flat out stating "I want to use you for your sperm and condoms are not an option" style.

I was twenty, and absolutely not looking to be a father, so I declined.

So she went and f*cked a random guy at a New Years Eve party.


A Kiss Of Death


Bad breath, I think she had a dead tooth or something. A shame.


No Tears Left To Cry

I met this guy in college and we'd flirted a lot for about 6 months and had electric chemistry, but we were never able to time a hook up. One night, we wound up at the same party and were talking a ton, but my friends got too drunk or something, so I wound up having to leave early. Guy texted me and asked if I wanted to hang out after he left the party, and I said yes. I was all excited, especially since I'd had a 1 year dry spell, but then, as I was waiting for him to show up, I wound up watching a documentary about 9/11. It was the 10 year anniversary, so it was basically nonstop coverage that weekend. I was definitely drunk, which definitely meant I started crying, so I wound up telling him not to bother coming over. So yes, I turned down sex with someone because I was too sad about 9/11.

We DID finally end up sealing the deal about a month later, and had a FWB situation for the months that followed. Then, we actually wound up trying to date about 2 years after that, which was a giant dumpster fire. I never told him why I flaked when we were supposed to hook up that first time.


Videogames And Chill?

Had a friend/coworker come on to me at her apartment. One day she texts me asking to come over to hang out, which I'd done before and mainly consisted of playing some Mario kart 64 or watching TV. When I get there she answers the door in just her panties and a shirt which totally caught me off guard. While we were watching tv she says her and her boyfriend were in a rough patch of not having sex and she wasn't too happy with that. She then asks if I can help end that problem for her and starts to rub herself through her panties while staring right at me. I start to freak because as much as I'd wanted to, I had a girlfriend. I tell her I can't and it wouldn't be right to both of our S/O's, even though deep down I wanted to. We proceeded to watch tv for about 10 awkward minutes before I told her I had to leave. Drove home with the bluest of balls that night.


She Didn't Need A Hookup--She Needed A Friend.


She had a lot of issues and has medication for them. She asked me if she could come over one day because she was having a breakdown. She came over, sat down and just burst into tears. I calmed her down, held her close and did my usual stupid cheering up thing I do which made her feel better. Through all the cuddling and holding one thing led to another and before we knew it all our clothes were off.

I suddenly realized that she was on a new medication that she was just prescribed and was high as a kite. I have a rule that I don't do stuff with someone new for the first time if they're under the influence of anything so I said we should stop and called it a night. Just chilled. Became good friends and have been for over a year now. She's a good friend and she may have a lot of issues but she powers through them one day at a time and I respect her immensely for it.


What's That Smell?  


He was charming, funny, model-level good looks, smart, and a hard worker. I was counting my lucky stars. I never saw his home until we were on the verge of having sex. I walked in the door and it smelled like shit. Literally. He had no pets, and he lived alone. When he opened the door the smell came pouring out and practically hit me in the face. He asked me what was wrong because I started to gag before walking through the door.

Let me be clear: I am not exaggerating here. I'm not prissy or sensitive to smells. I worked part time in the baby room of a daycare and spent a good portion of my days at the time cleaning up baby shit. I worked my summers on a farm cleaning up shit every year.

This guy's apartment smelled like a sewage processing plant, and when I tried to enter the doorway thinking "maybe he just has a plumbing problem" it was very evident that this guy had probably never cleaned a damn thing in his life because the living room was a disaster zone not fit for humans to occupy.

My vag sealed itself shut and I had to leave. I told him I couldn't come in anymore and left. When we talked later I told him the mess was a problem and I couldn't come over till he cleaned up, and he said that he was hoping I would "just take care of that now that we're getting serious."


A Good Guy, Right Here


I'd only recently met this girl, started dating and I was so super into her. We went to a fancy dress party (Halloween) and were both drinking loads and she came back to mine and started to get down to business, but she was way drunker than me. I thought we were getting on so incredibly well up to that night, I didn't want our first time together to be a drunken blur. So I stopped her in her tracks and she eventually, reluctantly agreed - room then went spinny for her, and she threw up shortly after... I managed to clean up the bed & bedsheets (well... took them off the bed immediately) and get her to bed. The following morning, she had zero recollection of any of it - she could remember being sick in my bathroom and I wasn't gonna bring up the bedsheets and her not taking no for an answer.

That was almost seven years ago now. She's currently 4 months pregnant with our first child. About a year ago (when the #metoo and consent/drunk consent was all the rage) the topic came up and I broke it to her that on that first night, she'd not taken no for an answer and had been sick on my bed sheets. She was mortified and embarrassed but it's all fine, obviously.

The funniest part? She apologized for when she woke up the following morning in my bed and though she said nothing, she'd been silently judging me because my bedsheets were in the wash and I had no covers on my mattress or quilt and she was questioning what kind of a weirdo would have no bedsheets... Always makes me laugh thinking back on that night. Still love her to bits and delighted our first time together wasn't a drunken blur.


We're all self-conscious about something, and it doesn't help when our faults get thrown in our faces. You don't want doctors hinting that something is "weird down there," nor do you want someone to tell you you're balding. WE KNOW.

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When you know your kids backwards and forwards, this is the best tool in your arsenal.

Getting our kids to listen to us is not always the easiest of tasks. They're willful and stubborn, but we've got a mighty weapon they are rarely prepared for: reverse psychology. Getting them to convince themselves to want to do something against their own initial intentions takes some work and a whole lot of creativity, but a little sneaky manipulation goes a long way. Here are some clever parents' tricks that are definitely worth taking notes on.

Redditor u/LeanderD Asks:

Parents of reddit, what's your best example of reversed psychology on your kids that actually worked?

He Floated His Idea Through A Back Channel


Wanted to name my boat. Anything I would think of was dismissed as stupid by my 13 year old son. After deciding on a name, I confided to a male friend my son liked. Made my friend suggest the name as though it was his idea. My son thought the name was perfect. Done.


We Always Want What We Can't Have

One of my best friends through childhood used to be punished with no salad if she misbehaved. She cherishes salad now and would always try to eat as much as possible during school lunch. Coincidentally, her now husband used to be punished with no books, it had the same effect. I think it's hilarious that they'd be hitting the salad bar and library like some black market their narc parents couldn't reach hahaha.


A Deceit That's A Cut Above The Rest


Don't know if this counts, but, at my high school (private, boys only) in the 1960's, they made a big deal about how long your hair was, and would occasionally order a boy to go home and "get a haircut".

I thought it was stupid, until years later, a master confided to me at a reunion that the policy was deliberate. The school figured we'd spend so much energy rebelling about hair length, that we would ignore other aspects of teenage rebellion. (Not?) Surprisingly, they were mostly right.


Damn! That's smart. Wow.


Oh they don't like long hair?

I'll show them. I'll grow my hair out as lon- what?! No I don't want to go "party"? I gotta try out this horse shampoo.


The Forbidden Book

Hi I was a victim,

There was a forbidden book that I was not allow to read on the shelf. My parents said I could only read it if I behave myself.

It was summer holidays and I was playing games all day (after 6 hrs of summer homework). One day I was home alone and had the opportunity to grabbed it. I read like half of it in one go. It was 5000 years of Chinese history.

Safe to say I was bamboozled.


Flowers Of The Queen

My parents always told me my broccoli were the flowers of the queen and that I really shouldn't eat them, or else the queen would get very upset! I, of course, ate the whole broccoli in a few seconds.


I'm telling the queen and she's gonna be pissed


Sleeping Beauty


I taught my kids when they were toddlers that no amount of yelling, shaking or hitting can wake a sleeping adult. The only thing that works is a gentle hug and/or a nice kiss on the cheek.

Edit: Probably needed some more details for the reverse psychology aspect to be clear. It went something like this - Step one, tell the kids I'm going to sleep and nothing they do will wake me (head buried face down is the safest position). Step two, after the initial onslaught dies down pretend to awaken on your own. Tell them you got a bit of nap left in you and nothing can wake you, especially not hugs and kisses.


Holy sh*t...if my daughter woke me up like this I would buy her a pony.


I am saving this comment because this will save lives if I ever have kids, stg.


A Walk In Someone Else's Shoes.

Split custody with my ex. When my son was around 10, he visited two weekends a month. I was waiting tables and didn't have a huge amount to spend, but he was so needy from divorce (and I'm not blaming him, it was ugly), he begged constantly for MORE when he was with me. Whatever more was, it didn't matter... he'd be eating ice cream cone and begging for teriyaki.

I finally realized that he just felt empty, and getting MORE whatever from me wasn't filling him up. His next visit I handed him $100 in cash and told him it was our food/fun budget for 3 days and two nights, and he was in charge of it. I bought him his own wallet to carry. We figured out how many times we were going to eat and what we were going to do, and he paid. He got to keep whatever money he had left...thought he was rich...then realized just how much everything cost. Well. Shoe on other foot then. If we had no money for food, we ate leftovers - and I didn't contribute more to pot. After a few weekends of running short or not getting something he actually wanted because he was foolish with funds, he started to really think about how to spend that money. He budgeted and kept to his budget. And a few times he actually went home with a little cash for his private stash.

Many years later, he thanked me for this. It really changed the way he thought about money and love.


This Is Worth Giving A Shot

Took my 3 year old son to one of those doctor's visits where he was going to get a shot. He was worried about the shot on the whole drive over, almost to the point of tears. We get to the doctor's office and a nurse subtly lets me know that my son is not just scheduled for 1 shot, but 5 of them in the same visit.

I turn to my son with an exaggerated smile and tell him, "Good news! They figured out how to take that one big shot you were going to get and instead break it up into these 5 little tiny shots so it won't hurt nearly as much!"

You could see the relief wash over his face. He stopped squirming and relaxed completely. He took the first shot and even smiled and said "It's true! The small ones don't hurt!"

We actually made it through the third shot before the effect wore off and reality kicked in. Still... I counted it as a victory.


Put This To The Taste


My mom would tell me she only lets me eat soup after candy and she'd only buy me candy that i didn't like. After a few times, i stopped trying and begged her to let me eat soup first. She gave me a smirk and told me go ahead. This doesn't sound as evil as it was. But trust me i suffered.


So what was the candy?


Mint chocolate, raisins, stuff like that. I still hate them to this day. Who the f--- thought while eating chocolate "hmm id like some tooth paste with this."


This is Truckin' Awesome

Mum had sworn a bit around the house.

When 4, while out at the supermarket, I said F word really loudly.

Very quickly and intently, she asked if I had just said "Truck" and said that was a bad word and not to ever say Truck like that again.

I thought that was the bad word so used that when being naughty.


The "Silly Mom" Routine

The "Silly Mom" routine.

My kid, and a few other kids I've known, would balk at getting ready to go. I'd grab their clothes and say, "Well, if you won't put on your clothes, I guess I'll put on your clothes. Cute shirt, by the way! Does it go on my foot?"


"Does it go on my head?"


"Oh, that's right, thanks! So, it must go on your legs, right?"


"I just can't figure this out! Where does this adorable shirt go?"

[kid grabs shirt and puts it on] ON MY TUMMY! SILLY MOM!

"Oh, thank you so much! Now what about these pants? Shirts go on tummies, so...the pants go on the tummy, too, right?"


[continue until kids have dressed themselves]

I would also do things like hand the kid my keys and say, "Alright, you're driving, I'll sit in the booster seat in back," attempt to feed the kid by putting a spoon up to his ear or his belly button, and attempt to put away his toys in the refrigerator.


Some Foot For Thought.


My mum would always yell at us "if you don't do X, you have to go to bed without socks!"

I never wore socks anyway, and I'm ashamed to admit that this worked.


That would work really well on my son, or make him cry for a really long time... He's 3 and over the last few weeks has decided that he is fully unable to sleep without socks on.


Toddlers man. Completely unpredictable.


I'm Greens With Envy

My mum had a friend that would put vegetables on her own plate and not the kids.

When the kids asked she would be reluctant to share, "that's grown up food. But I suppose I can let you have a little."

Her kids grew up loving vegetables.

I sat at the dinner table for 3 hours staring at the yucky cauliflower I refused to eat.


This reminds me of an instance when my child convinced my wife and myself to change our plans for dinner. We were in a grocery store to pick up something quick and easy to eat that we wouldn't have to prepare. Our daughter, wanted none of that, she demanded that she wanted a salad from the salad bar. We started to argue back, but then realized: "Our child demands that we feed her vegetables for dinner instead of a microwaved meal, why are we saying 'No?'"

We had salad for dinner that night.


The Power Of Choice

I don't so much know if you would call it reverse psychology, but I didn't realize it until my dad told me this.

When there were chores that needed doing, he noticed if he asked me to mow the lawn, I would complain and procrastinate. But if he asked would I rather mow the lawn or wash the windows, I'd pick one and just get it done.

Shattered my brain when he told me when I was in my twenties. I use it when I'm coaching or baby sitting all the time and it almost never fails.


The Boy Who Cried 'Ouch'


I've done this one with tens of kids. Any time a kid gets "hurt" (falls down on grass, gets gently hit in the face with a ball, etc.) instead of stopping the activity to pick the kid up and see if they're ok you just scoot them off to the side and resume. Within 10 seconds of not getting all the attention and seeing the fun is resuming they pop right back up and are magically healed.

This of course is only for the "injuries" that aren't actually injuries.


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