It's hard not loving human interaction. You will go to lengths to avoid people. And sometimes, those lengths will be story-worthy...
Here are some of those answers.
Not A Social TripGiphy
College. Had to attend an out-of-town conference with my classmates as part of the requirements for a course. My professor had booked a block of rooms at the hotel where the conference was held, and people were going to put 3-4 guys or girls to a room and split the cost. My classmates had a bunch of socializing and bar hopping planned, which sounds like my idea of a living hell. Also, all of them carpooled together in groups. I honestly would have rather walked barefoot across a mile of Legos than to be held hostage in a car for 4 hours with people I barely know.
A few people asked if I wanted to carpool with them and what room I was in and I said "Oh, thank you so much! I'm actually staying with a friend in town though, and I'm stoked to see her - I'm going to have to take my own car so I can drive to the conference. I'll catch you guys there!" so I wouldn't come off as a weirdo.
But I actually reserved a room at another hotel way across town, attended the bare minimum of the conference, and enjoyed as many coffee shops, art museums, downtown shopping trips, and nature trails as I could.
Stealing Your Own Stuff
Back when I had roommates I didn't know very well, I'd spend all day in my room without meals to avoid awkward pleasantries. Then I'd get really hungry but the prospect of explaining why I'd spent all day in my room kept me inside. Then they'd text me and ask if I was okay, and I'd say "Yep! Just keeping busy with some projects." And they'd ask if I'd eaten anything since they hadn't seen me, and I'd say "Yep! Trust me, I'd never go without food!" Then I'd wake up at midnight and steal my own food from the fridge.
In high school I didn't have a car so I walked home. I used to just fast walk to try to beat the crowd of people, but I just didn't want to deal with it anymore so I would stay in the computer lab sometimes and ask my dad to pick me up a few hours later.
So once the bell rang to go home, I would just stay in class since I had computers last. The teacher would forget I was in there/not even notice me and then turn the lights off, lock the door, then leave... honestly I didn't mind at all, I got to play video games by myself and one time about an hour and a half later the janitor came in and I guess I scared him. He turned the lights on and literally screamed when he saw me. :(
Men At The Door
I'm 29. Guy knocked on my door and I looked out the peep hole and he was looking directly gazing into it back at me so I ducked and crouched at the base of the door and then he opened the mail slot to look in which was right above me and I just laid on the ground until he went away.
Animals Are Better Than People
In 7th grade I would hide in the science lab during lunch and recess time and feed and play with the school pets. I would ask to use the bathroom around ten minutes into lunch and then come back in the last 2 minutes, they probably thought I had some real bad bowel issues.
They were two birds, a bunny, and two Guinea pigs. I would feed them carrots and talk to them. Nobody knew that I was there for half of the year, when one of my teachers finally walked in on me I thought I was busted. Luckily she was one of the nicer ones and made it my official "Job" to play with and feed the animals.
Making My Own Life HarderGiphy
I was getting a taxi back home and must've mumbled or garbled my destination because it was quite clear he was going to a completely different place. Like, literally as soon as he turned right out of the parking lot instead of left.
I literally let the guy drive for 15 minutes in the wrong direction, eventually just blurting out "anywhere here will do" and giving him a tenner, and then just walking aimlessly until I found a public transport I recognized and jumped on that. A 10-min cab drive turned into a nearly 2 hour journey home.
(For those curious and who live in Manchester, UK, I wanted to get a cab from Ashton to Openshaw, and ended up going to Oldham, getting a tram to the city centre, and getting a train from there back home.)
I Would Walk 3 Miles
My roommate threw a party at my house and i hid from everyone. there's only one front door and everyone would see me if i left and would want to talk to me. i avoided eating that whole night because i didn't want to walk by the party to get food. my car was trapped between other cars. i ended up jumping out of a second story window and walking 3 miles to a 7-eleven.
I'd Rather Be Driving
I routinely cross streets or turn down streets that are in the wrong direction of where I'm going to avoid awkward interactions with vehicles as a pedestrian.
Please don't stop and give me that "it's okay to go!" wave when there's still traffic barrelling down the opposite side of the street and you're the only vehicle trying to be courteous.
I appreciate what you're trying to do but it would be easier for everyone if you just kept driving.
It Ain't ChristmasGiphy
In order to avoid a mandatory Christmas social for work, I legitimately took myself to the ER just to get the registration wristband (for proof that I actually went to the hospital) and then left. Wasn't sick or anything, and I didn't even see a doctor. I just needed a hospital wristband to prove that I had a reason not to go to the work mixer (so I wouldn't get fired).
I hated my coworkers.
Lived in a loft downtown on the 3rd Floor. The amount of times I used the stairs in effort to not being trapped on an elevator with a stranger is too many to count. One time there was a family moving in. I walked all the way around the building to the opposite side's entrance to get into the building.
Then they were using the elevators, so I took the stairs, then they were ON MY FLOOR moving shit in. I didn't want it to look like I was trying this hard to avoid them, so I said, "whoops! Wrong floor" and walked up 2 extra floors and waited 10 minutes before going back down to see if they were gone.
What should've taken me 5 minutes took me close to 30 to get in my apartment. That's when I realized I might have a problem.
I went to an empty room and stood in the dark for 45 minutes to avoid a team bonding event.
Team-bonding is the absolute worst for an introvert
Just the word "icebreaker" gives me PTSD
"Alright everybody. Pair up!"
I always feel bad for the person who has to work with me, because they almost definitely didn't choose this voluntarily. I just awkwardly hide in a corner until all pairs are formed and then wait for someone to ask if anyone's left. I really don't like this kind of forced team work.
I don't remember how it started, but at one point a couple of 8th grade girls bullied me and I volunteered to help a teacher during her lunch period (same as mine) grade spelling tests. So she "hired" me as her assistant and I graded papers. (I was a very good student and spelling was my JAM, so it's not like I hated it.)
Fun fact, we are now friends on FB 35 years later. What a great teacher, but fact is, I'm sure she loved me saving her from taking home a bunch of stuff to grade.
Going through the drive through just to park and eat alone in my car.
Ugh yes! I do this a lot. Or even if I have to pick the food up, I will take it to my car and find a spot away from everyone where I can eat in peace.
Papa can you hear me?
My parents moved me to a different country when I was 10, and for the first year and a half I was so painfully shy that I didn't say a single word to anyone. I still made friends, I just didn't say anything more than "yes" "no" and "thank you."
One day I finally got up the courage to ask the girl next to me for a pen and she called the teacher and said "SIR! SHE SPOKE!!!"
Not to be a "then everyone clapped" person, but they actually did.
I wear headphones all the time. Even if they're off/not plugged in. I'm so much more productive at work, people at the gym let me be, and people on the street leave me alone on my walk home.
I do that and people still bug me. Esp on the train, people will wave in front of my face to get my attention to usually ask for directions.
I was standing inbetween train carriages a few weeks back. There were no seats left and the area I was standing in was really busy. Full of people. So started reading a book to avoid conversation and eye contact. Minding my own business y'know. Random guy gets on after about 10 mins and starts talking to me. He picks me out of the whole damn carriage. I was the only one reading. He wants to know what the book is about initially and then wants a conversation about films, music and more. Nightmare journey.
Go The Distance
Sometimes I have an easier time interacting with complete strangers since it's less likely that I'll ever see them again.
My neighbor had double parked behind me and I needed to get to work. So I ordered an uber, took it to the train station, rode the train, and took another uber to my jobsite (and then did the whole thing in reverse to get home at the end of the day).