an Oh Myyy Property

We're all familiar with the feeling of losing faith in humanity. It's that feeling that makes you facepalm at your desk when you read the latest nonsense in your newsfeed.


Some people, though, seem to feel the need to be extra and go out of their way to be as ridiculous as possible. Sometimes they're socially tonedeaf or just having an off day, and sometimes they're just a really horrible person.

Redditors StannistheMannis96 asked:

"What was your biggest 'I hate people' moment?"

We've collected some of the best, and worst, replies.

Some replies edited for content or clarity.

Emergency

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You know those bright, flashing red and white lights in your rear view mirror? The really loud, annoying wailing? It's called an ambulance. No, I won't switch lanes. If I switch lanes and you decide to panic because all of a sudden, you remember that you're suppose to pull over, and I get hit? Then I get in trouble for not driving in the number 1 lane AND one of us is probably gonna get hurt.

Weewoooweeewooomoveoverweewoo

-greenworld6

Never Interrupt Plant Shopping

Part of my job is handling video requests for young classical musicians which often means dealing with their parents... who are often rich, entitled helicopters that think their kid is Paganini incarnate.

There's too many stupid conversations to count but my favorite was the dad, who called me after hours when I was plant shopping (cell is on my signature because I don't work in the main office) to yell about, I think, him thinking the audio quality on one video was worse compared the other. The one he was complaining about had a mix from the main audio recording (super high definition) and the one he thought was good was sh**ty camera audio. He assumed that was better because it was loud (aka compressed to hell by the camera's auto limiter).

He got a email from me when I got home with my bosses cc'd that said, in very polite words, that if he ever called my personal cell again for something so pointless especially during non-working hours (it was at like 7pm), all further requests for his child would be disregarded.

He was much nicer after that.

Edit: I "fixed" the audio by running it through a very aggressive, multiband compressor. Not the most professional path but the dude kinda ruined a nice time with my GF.

-InterruptedI

A Little Louder For The People In The Back

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LET PEOPLE OFF THE TRAIN BEFORE GETTING ON

-talldarkandanxious

But That Would Make Things Easier For Everyone

When waiting for bags at baggage claim, and everyone crowds in super close so no one can see anything except those at the front, and no one can get their bags off because other people are in the way. Just back off people! You only need to be that close for the 5 seconds it takes to grab your bag!

-HNSUSN

Yeah...

When a "go fund me" account was created to help one of those Kardashian girls become a billionaire.

-MrBlack-13

Try Something New For A Change

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On the Amalfi coast at an amazing restaurant you have to take a boat to get to, there was a couple sitting next to us that threw a huge tantrum because they didn't have chicken alfredo. Then got even more angry when the boat wasn't going to be back for 15 minutes and demanded the restaurant call another boat immediately.

-Keepsmakingaccounts

Just Get Out Of Everyone's Way

In busy parking lots, when the guy in front of you sees someone heading *to* their car with a cart full of groceries then pops their brakes and waits for the spot to open up, especially when there are already other open spots further up the lane.

It's one thing to wait a few seconds so someone can back up and you can park, it's another thing entirely to hold the other cars behind you hostage while Grandma loads her minivan one bag at a time then spends a few minutes on the phone before backing out- all because you want to park a few feet closer to the front door of H-E-B.

-theonlydidymus

Oh Yes, I Totally Fell On Purpose

Every time I go to Costco. Don't get me wrong, the employees are great, but something about the place just makes people hit me with their cart. One particular time comes to mind, when I was crutching it, they hit me pretty hard, they were coming from a side aisle, knocked me down, my crutch was stuck in her cart in that spot where you put heavy stuff on the rack under the cart... I couldn't get my crutch unwedged from it... she came around and I thought she was going to help me... but instead, the first words out of her mouth were "You were in my way!" and she went on to yell at me for like a minute or two straight (I just tuned the rest out) while I got my crutch out myself and worked to get back up.

She also had the "I'd like to speak to your manager" haircut... I dunno why that sticks in my memory, but it does... maybe because mean people all seem to have the same haircuts.

Edit: thank you all for your kind responses, I had no idea so many people have had so many similar experiences! I don't hate Costco, and their employees are just the best, but I do my very very best to dodge that place on the weekends because of precisely incidents like the above. I don't know whether people feel tough because of the big carts or what, but it's way worse than any other grocery store or home depot or anything like that in terms of people's near complete lack of situational awareness.

-firefly212

It's A Cat, That's How They Are

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Used to work at a vet clinic and had a euthanasia scheduled. Couple came in with a healthy looking cat... Wanted to put the cat down because "it has eye boogers and just sits around." We refused to put him down and kept him as our office cat. He was the friendliest cat and loved to do tricks!

-Sheesh19

It WAS Free

My image was copied off of a public website and a large watermark slapped on it. The image was free for public use and now the stock photo company charges people to remove the watermark and use it. Ironically it's still available for free on the public website if you dig a long way.

-drsameagler

It's Really Not That Difficult

Whenever I walk into a public washroom and someone didn't flush.

-uhmduh

Finite Amount Of Space

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Whenever people try to get into a cramped public space before letting people out.

It's like...where do you think you're going to go? Literally?

-toucan_sam8989

Take Responsibility

That moment for me was 3 years ago. I was driving home with my mother in the passenger seat, and my 10 year old brother sitting in the back. We're sitting at a stop light when suddenly we're hit from behind by another car. I check on mom and brother who are both shaken up and crying but seem to be physically unharmed. I get out of the car to check for damages and the back is completely totalled. I walk up to the car who hit us and the guy is freaked out and super apologetic.

All the while, people are honking and screaming at us to get out of the way. I ask him to move his car to the parking lot on the corner so we can properly exchange information that's not in the middle of a busy intersection. The guy says "of course!" Puts his car into reverse, turns all the way around then speeds off in the opposite direction. Hit and run.

If that moment wasn't enough to make me hate humans... as this guy speeds off, another guy in a pick-up truck pulls up to us only to say "guess he got away from you!" Laughs, and then also drives away. No ,"are you all ok?" or "gee, that sucks". Laughs and drives away.

Luckily I took a photo of his license plate as I got out the car so when the cops came we were able to track his vehicle down. Turns out, it was a stolen vehicle and the guy was intoxicated. Humans suck sometimes.

-dreamweavein

Really? 

My great-grandfather was an admiral in the British Navy during WWI. When the war ended, he was given the ship's bell, which had been inscribed with a dedication to him. In 1950, after moving to Canada, he bought an area of land in Ontario to build a cottage on. He built the cottage by hand, and decided that because this land had become one of his favorite places, he decided to bring the bell there, too. He attached it to a tree using a large chain. Well, some asshat went to the island when he wasn't there, cut the chain, and stole this bell, my grandfather's greatest possession. He was devastated by it, and we lost an important family treasure.

-the_alabaster_llama

It's Right There

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When you pull into a seemingly empty parking spot but there's a shopping cart that someone left in the middle of it RIGHT NEXT TO THE RETURN AREA!

-3HundoGuy

12. Inches. Away.

Working at art museum, you would not believe the amount of people who believe that because they have degrees in Art and/or are just really enthusiastic about it have the right to touch the artworks. As in, fingers straight onto the 300-year old paintings and ancient sculptures.

"Oh, it's okay, I have a Masters' in Art History!"

Cool. 12 inches away, please.

"But I was just trying to demonstrate to my coll--"

**12. Inches. Away.**

-operarose

Keep Your Head Down

Whenever I have to go to the store during a holiday.

-Vlaed

*Sigh*

When I found the shoplifting subreddit and it's literally just people talking about stealing, ways to steal and showing off their 'hauls'.

-SarniaMelee

Be Kind

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I was panhandling for change to go to an interview. Couldn't afford the bus/subway. A chick dumped her coffee on me and screamed to get a job.

-Kin-Of-The-Cosmos

What We've All Been Thinking 

Is "every day" an acceptable answer?

-JameisGOATson

I was going to post "The part of the day when I'm awake." so yes.

-SessileRaptor

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Hmmmm, I don't think THAT'S your essay....

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When you know your kids backwards and forwards, this is the best tool in your arsenal.

Getting our kids to listen to us is not always the easiest of tasks. They're willful and stubborn, but we've got a mighty weapon they are rarely prepared for: reverse psychology. Getting them to convince themselves to want to do something against their own initial intentions takes some work and a whole lot of creativity, but a little sneaky manipulation goes a long way. Here are some clever parents' tricks that are definitely worth taking notes on.

Redditor u/LeanderD Asks:

Parents of reddit, what's your best example of reversed psychology on your kids that actually worked?

He Floated His Idea Through A Back Channel

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Wanted to name my boat. Anything I would think of was dismissed as stupid by my 13 year old son. After deciding on a name, I confided to a male friend my son liked. Made my friend suggest the name as though it was his idea. My son thought the name was perfect. Done.

calypsodweller

We Always Want What We Can't Have

One of my best friends through childhood used to be punished with no salad if she misbehaved. She cherishes salad now and would always try to eat as much as possible during school lunch. Coincidentally, her now husband used to be punished with no books, it had the same effect. I think it's hilarious that they'd be hitting the salad bar and library like some black market their narc parents couldn't reach hahaha.

cookiearthquake

A Deceit That's A Cut Above The Rest

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Don't know if this counts, but, at my high school (private, boys only) in the 1960's, they made a big deal about how long your hair was, and would occasionally order a boy to go home and "get a haircut".

I thought it was stupid, until years later, a master confided to me at a reunion that the policy was deliberate. The school figured we'd spend so much energy rebelling about hair length, that we would ignore other aspects of teenage rebellion. (Not?) Surprisingly, they were mostly right.

FrankDrakman

Damn! That's smart. Wow.

fangxx456

Oh they don't like long hair?

I'll show them. I'll grow my hair out as lon- what?! No I don't want to go "party"? I gotta try out this horse shampoo.

DankeyKang11

The Forbidden Book

Hi I was a victim,

There was a forbidden book that I was not allow to read on the shelf. My parents said I could only read it if I behave myself.

It was summer holidays and I was playing games all day (after 6 hrs of summer homework). One day I was home alone and had the opportunity to grabbed it. I read like half of it in one go. It was 5000 years of Chinese history.

Safe to say I was bamboozled.

oddstodd

Flowers Of The Queen

My parents always told me my broccoli were the flowers of the queen and that I really shouldn't eat them, or else the queen would get very upset! I, of course, ate the whole broccoli in a few seconds.

Subwoofy

I'm telling the queen and she's gonna be pissed

draculacletus

Sleeping Beauty

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I taught my kids when they were toddlers that no amount of yelling, shaking or hitting can wake a sleeping adult. The only thing that works is a gentle hug and/or a nice kiss on the cheek.

Edit: Probably needed some more details for the reverse psychology aspect to be clear. It went something like this - Step one, tell the kids I'm going to sleep and nothing they do will wake me (head buried face down is the safest position). Step two, after the initial onslaught dies down pretend to awaken on your own. Tell them you got a bit of nap left in you and nothing can wake you, especially not hugs and kisses.

DrMethusael

Holy sh*t...if my daughter woke me up like this I would buy her a pony.

All-Seeing_Elon

I am saving this comment because this will save lives if I ever have kids, stg.

smerter

A Walk In Someone Else's Shoes.

Split custody with my ex. When my son was around 10, he visited two weekends a month. I was waiting tables and didn't have a huge amount to spend, but he was so needy from divorce (and I'm not blaming him, it was ugly), he begged constantly for MORE when he was with me. Whatever more was, it didn't matter... he'd be eating ice cream cone and begging for teriyaki.

I finally realized that he just felt empty, and getting MORE whatever from me wasn't filling him up. His next visit I handed him $100 in cash and told him it was our food/fun budget for 3 days and two nights, and he was in charge of it. I bought him his own wallet to carry. We figured out how many times we were going to eat and what we were going to do, and he paid. He got to keep whatever money he had left...thought he was rich...then realized just how much everything cost. Well. Shoe on other foot then. If we had no money for food, we ate leftovers - and I didn't contribute more to pot. After a few weekends of running short or not getting something he actually wanted because he was foolish with funds, he started to really think about how to spend that money. He budgeted and kept to his budget. And a few times he actually went home with a little cash for his private stash.

Many years later, he thanked me for this. It really changed the way he thought about money and love.

Augumenti

This Is Worth Giving A Shot

Took my 3 year old son to one of those doctor's visits where he was going to get a shot. He was worried about the shot on the whole drive over, almost to the point of tears. We get to the doctor's office and a nurse subtly lets me know that my son is not just scheduled for 1 shot, but 5 of them in the same visit.

I turn to my son with an exaggerated smile and tell him, "Good news! They figured out how to take that one big shot you were going to get and instead break it up into these 5 little tiny shots so it won't hurt nearly as much!"

You could see the relief wash over his face. He stopped squirming and relaxed completely. He took the first shot and even smiled and said "It's true! The small ones don't hurt!"

We actually made it through the third shot before the effect wore off and reality kicked in. Still... I counted it as a victory.

blackbird77

Put This To The Taste

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My mom would tell me she only lets me eat soup after candy and she'd only buy me candy that i didn't like. After a few times, i stopped trying and begged her to let me eat soup first. She gave me a smirk and told me go ahead. This doesn't sound as evil as it was. But trust me i suffered.

turkeypr0

So what was the candy?

Poster_Main

Mint chocolate, raisins, stuff like that. I still hate them to this day. Who the f--- thought while eating chocolate "hmm id like some tooth paste with this."

turkeypr0

This is Truckin' Awesome

Mum had sworn a bit around the house.

When 4, while out at the supermarket, I said F word really loudly.

Very quickly and intently, she asked if I had just said "Truck" and said that was a bad word and not to ever say Truck like that again.

I thought that was the bad word so used that when being naughty.

GodOfTheThunder

The "Silly Mom" Routine

The "Silly Mom" routine.

My kid, and a few other kids I've known, would balk at getting ready to go. I'd grab their clothes and say, "Well, if you won't put on your clothes, I guess I'll put on your clothes. Cute shirt, by the way! Does it go on my foot?"

NO!

"Does it go on my head?"

NO! IT GOES ON ME!

"Oh, that's right, thanks! So, it must go on your legs, right?"

NO!

"I just can't figure this out! Where does this adorable shirt go?"

[kid grabs shirt and puts it on] ON MY TUMMY! SILLY MOM!

"Oh, thank you so much! Now what about these pants? Shirts go on tummies, so...the pants go on the tummy, too, right?"

NO!

[continue until kids have dressed themselves]

I would also do things like hand the kid my keys and say, "Alright, you're driving, I'll sit in the booster seat in back," attempt to feed the kid by putting a spoon up to his ear or his belly button, and attempt to put away his toys in the refrigerator.

insertcaffeine

Some Foot For Thought.

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My mum would always yell at us "if you don't do X, you have to go to bed without socks!"

I never wore socks anyway, and I'm ashamed to admit that this worked.

Splittsky

That would work really well on my son, or make him cry for a really long time... He's 3 and over the last few weeks has decided that he is fully unable to sleep without socks on.

PJQueen

Toddlers man. Completely unpredictable.

SheaRVA

I'm Greens With Envy

My mum had a friend that would put vegetables on her own plate and not the kids.

When the kids asked she would be reluctant to share, "that's grown up food. But I suppose I can let you have a little."

Her kids grew up loving vegetables.

I sat at the dinner table for 3 hours staring at the yucky cauliflower I refused to eat.

laik72

This reminds me of an instance when my child convinced my wife and myself to change our plans for dinner. We were in a grocery store to pick up something quick and easy to eat that we wouldn't have to prepare. Our daughter, wanted none of that, she demanded that she wanted a salad from the salad bar. We started to argue back, but then realized: "Our child demands that we feed her vegetables for dinner instead of a microwaved meal, why are we saying 'No?'"

We had salad for dinner that night.

Galaxy_Ranger_Bob

The Power Of Choice

I don't so much know if you would call it reverse psychology, but I didn't realize it until my dad told me this.

When there were chores that needed doing, he noticed if he asked me to mow the lawn, I would complain and procrastinate. But if he asked would I rather mow the lawn or wash the windows, I'd pick one and just get it done.

Shattered my brain when he told me when I was in my twenties. I use it when I'm coaching or baby sitting all the time and it almost never fails.

AppealToReason16

The Boy Who Cried 'Ouch'

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I've done this one with tens of kids. Any time a kid gets "hurt" (falls down on grass, gets gently hit in the face with a ball, etc.) instead of stopping the activity to pick the kid up and see if they're ok you just scoot them off to the side and resume. Within 10 seconds of not getting all the attention and seeing the fun is resuming they pop right back up and are magically healed.

This of course is only for the "injuries" that aren't actually injuries.

pedanticProgramer

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