an Oh Myyy Property

Stupid rules are the bane of almost every employees existence. We've pretty much all been there and just tried to keep our faces from being too loud about what we were really thinking about the new policy. Take heart, people. We're about to share"Well, that backfired" workplace policies.

One Reddit user asked:

What is one rule that was implemented at your job that backfired horribly?


The answers had us cracking up and swelling with pride (shout-out to the lady who wore a tutu to work) at just how brilliantly sarcastic employees can be when faced with dumb bureaucracy. Truly, nothing has filled us with more hope for our future than these majestic policy failures and how many of these failures were the direct result of pure unfiltered smartassery.

We applaud you all.

Coordinated Lunch Effort

We got a new manager for our office - she was an outside hire and was trying to prove herself quickly, and she was obsessed with efficiency.

So, her first week here she sent out this very rudely worded email about employees eating at our desks (we have a very small break area - 4 tables and we have about 300 employees here) and that we all had to stop eating at our desks, because "it was not efficient to eat and try to work at the same time".

Through a coordinated effort by some of the more sassy people at the office they all had their lunches at the same time and filled the break room with about 90 people. Elbow to elbow and they all ate standing up. Literally, the next day after that happened, she sent out a follow-up email saying that we could eat at our desks but she advised us to take a break from our work from time to time.

It was pretty funny.

Stupid Measurements

I'm a programmer. On a previous job, we were measured by the number of tasks completed. Not how hard they were, or how well they were completed. Just how many. Management ignored our protests and attempts to explain how inaccurate that was.

We figured out to subdivide everything to blow it up into the maximum number of listed tasks possible. A manager might request a new report, so instead of just having "create report" be a task, we'd set up separate tickets for "create button", "make button blue", "make button respond when clicked", "implement business logic", "display results in grid", "allow sorting of grid", and so on. We'd subdivide a 1-day task into 20 one-hour tasks.

Management loved it! Our team "looked" twenty times as productive, despite the fact that we were deliberately slowing ourselves down with red tape.

Increased Foosball Productivity

We had a foosball table at a former job. People would play reasonably often, but just 1 game to take a break. One day, management came down to the software engineering floor and saw people playing foosball in the middle of the afternoon. They declared "no foosball until 4:30 PM"

That ended up making it so that everybody knew when there would be other people wanting to play foosball, so it was much easier to find somebody willing to play and significantly increased the amount of foosball played at work.

Updated Wording

My Dad was a corpsman with the Marines doing high desert training in the Mojave. They had a big problem with people getting bit but not being able to identify the snake, so it was hard to find the right antidote. My dad got all the Marines in a room and said:

_"If you get bit by a snake, bring it back here so we can identify it." _

Not even a full week later they had to alter the wording because a marine was bit by a rattlesnake and decided to bring it back-without killing it. This man had carried this snake all the way back to base ALIVE, and the snake decided to let him know exactly how he felt about that by repeatedly biting his arm the entire time. Needless to say, that marine went home, and they made sure to hold another meeting where they told everyone to KILL the snake, then bring it back.

"Just Had A Beer"

My company, as part of its alcohol policy, said you should not drink for at least four hours before coming to work. When engineers got called about production problems over the weekend, they all "just had a beer" but could be there in about four or five hours once that time limit expired.

Dress Code Policy For One

An insane amount of time and hand wringing went into my office's dress code policy. Nobody wanted one except for one person - and they demanded it. When the final draft was ultimately released, every department head had a valid reason why their staff should be exempted. So the policy wound up only affecting myself and the guy that insisted on making the policy.

I violate this policy on a daily basis.

No Overtime Pay

Overtime is paid in free time instead of money. Three people quit so far, more people planning to. No new hires to be found. It's probably just a matter of time before this shop closes down.

Sexist Dress Code Meets Its Match

I worked for this consulting company once that out of the blue issued a new dress code requiring women to wear skirts to work. At the time, most of the women employees were front office, so I'm guessing they just forgot about the handful of us working in development, where we rarely saw our clients directly, and would often end up doing things like crawling around on the floor moving cables around and things (we did a lot of turnkey systems). It wasn't just the developers, either. A lot of the front office women weren't happy about the prospect of having to buy all new work clothes, and there are plenty of women who never wear skirts and didn't want to start.

We brought it up with HR, but they blew us off, so we got together and agreed on a hostile compliance approach, where we'd wear the most inappropriate skirts we could find. There was patchwork! Big ugly wife style skirts! Some frilly thing that almost looked like a tutu! At least one woman put a skirt on over her pants. And little did they know, I had a small collection of vintage 1960s leather miniskirts!

I was almost disappointed when they buckled and changed the dress code back because that was kind of fun.

The Bonus

I worked for a place that did PC repairs. During my orientation the guy taking me around took me to the QA department. Once all builds or repairs are made they're sent to the QA department for a final inspection before going out to the customer. The guy jokingly said:

**"We used to pay the QA guys bonuses for every mistake they found on a build." **

I started laughing. The only problem was it wasn't a joke. They actually paid bonuses to the QA people who found mistakes on builds. For anyone not familiar with the internal workings of a PC, it could take less than 3 seconds to completely render a computer inoperable. Hell, you could loosen a connection just by inspecting it. Luckily that policy ended before I was hired.

I mean can you imagine giving someone a bonus for finding screw ups when it would take almost no effort to make a screw up and then claim they found it?

No Bathroom? No Students.

I worked at a large high school of about 3000 students. As a teacher, you realize fights happen. We all know they do and best thing to do is make sure those involved are punished and leave it at that.

This was our principals first year in the building. She wasn't a new principal as in brand new, but she was new to our school. Our school wasn't horrible but it was declining.

A fight happens first period on the basement floor. Security is called, those involved are sent to the deans. Whatever it happens no big deal right?

Principal comes on announcements 2nd period. First she acknowledges there was a fight, which most already knew about. It's a high school after all. Then she says:

"No student will be allowed to leave to use the bathroom the rest of the day! Teachers do not allow students to leave to use the bathroom!"

Well, this wasn't received well. Students decide to flood the halls, yelling and shouting. This happens on all floors (six total). Students refusing to go to class and just shouting, yelling, running in the halls. I opened my class for the good kids and got in as many as I could.

Security couldn't do anything. This went on for 2-3 periods, most of these kids said f*ck it and just left.

Around 6th period an assembly was held. Those students who remained were put in the auditorium where they were lectured by administration. These were the "good" kids who stayed and did nothing wrong, mind you!

Eventually word gets out to the NY Post that there was a "riot."

She turned out to be an awful principal and after more incidents and bad press we ran her out within a span of 2 years.

Accidentally Awful

We created this thing called the "safety bonus." It was one of four possible bonuses people could get. The original version of it said that anyone that was accident-free would get a bonus.

So people stopped reporting their accidents.

We had to set up another Safety Award for those who filed their safety reports in a timely manner with clear print and full details.

Out In A Storm

**"You're not allowed to stay in the building during breaks" **

That meant the employees had to be outside during a storm. The next week most of the people were sick at home.

15 Minute Time Sheets

IT department changed how work is given out and time is accounted for:

We now had to fill out daily time sheets that accounted for every 15 min section of time with a summary of what you've worked on. The time sheets were a waste, we had to stop work and report what we were working on.

Classic micro management, within months the entire IT staff left except 1 guy.

Don't micro manage when the job market is full of other jobs that will just let people actually work.

Change Of Plans

At my previous job, you could schedule vacation and give it back if your plans changed. One guy would schedule 2 weeks off, wait until the schedule was made for that month, then give it back. Since the schedule assumed he wasn't going to be there, he would make up his own shifts, since he was "extra."

This would lead to him "working 11-7" (showing up at 2, taking lunch, working from 4-6 and leaving early). He would do this 3-4 times per year.

Do Nothing

"Don't do anything unless directed by your Boss, any deviation from this will result in write-up/termination."

This was a very literal directive from upper management that took place after an office incident. Our work is very fluid, and our team alone contained 20 people. Needless to say productivity hit unfounded lows.

"No Ragrets"

Work wanted everyone to come in even when sick so the boss can inspect us to determine if we can work or not. Doctors notes were not accepted "since they can be fake."

I complied. Ended up vomiting on his desk over important papers.

"No ragrets."

Unexcused

My work just recently tried to implement a new attendance policy that didn't last 24hrs. They changed it so that after two "unexcused" absences in a year you were automatically fired. An "unexcused" absence is any absence or tardiness when you didn't give your boss more than 24hrs notice.

So nobody could get sick or have an emergency? Waking up puking is an unexcused absence?

Nice.

Sick Points

My old job had a Draconian attendance policy in which if you were at a second late, you got a 1/2 point demerit. If you were an hour late, you got that same 1/2 point demerit. Demerits accrued:

3=verbal warning

4=written

5 or 6 was termination

In addition to making for some anxiety-filled employees feel forced to make dumb decisions like speed through snow storms, it also meant if you got stuck in a traffic jam, you might as well just take your time, stop for gas, get breakfast, etc.

Same place also had a similar policy that assured the plague spread through the whole place. Say you came to work at 7. By 9 am you've got a fever and full-blown flu symptoms. If you clock out then, you get a whole-point demerit. But if you sit there coughing and shivering and infecting your coworkers for another 2 hours (til your shift was half over), you only got a half-point demerit.

Lunch Budget

I used to work for a production company that employed a lot of really skilled, award winning editors. There were producers and executives and directors but the real money makers, the people who really made the company were the editors, so the company was basically centered around them.

The executives would always order in food for the editors, and the editors would usually eat in their offices while doing their thing.

One day the executives decided to cut paid lunches to save money. The editors all thought this was a dick move, so they'd go out for lunch and sometimes stay out for like 3 hours. There was nothing the company could do, really, because these editors were top of their game and if Warner Bros. heard that the editor they always used had left, they might leave, too.

So the company couldn't do anything. They saved maybe $15 dollars per person per day, but lost like 4 hours per person per day.

No Sofa? Longer Naps

New manager got rid of the sofa in the break room so that people couldn't nap on their hour long lunch break. It ended up making one person sleep even more.

No one ever overslept or abused the privilege, but it was good to have the option on a tough day. Once the sofa was gone, our stoner guy started sleeping in other places. The layout was terrible, so there were half walls and all kinds of nooks and crannies to hide in; including in-between walls and in the warehouse. That's when we started losing him. We couldn't find him to wake him up, and he would oversleep. The couch in the break room was a common area with people moving about, and he could only catnap there. Since he was finding little hiding spots he would go into a deeper sleep and was less likely to be disturbed by our calls for him.

He didn't lose his job somehow, that place had a hard time hiring.

GoFundMe

The parents of Ja'bari Gray, a baby boy born on New Year's Day in San Antonio, have only been able to hold their son twice in three months––because Ja'bari has no skin.

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A bride is regretting her decision for her sympathy-inviting a woman who was not initially invited to join her bachelorette weekend.

The bride-to-be originally omitted a "friend" from the list because she was a "downer." But this friend refused to be tossed aside and complained to the point where caving was the only option.

Sometimes, going with your gut and hurting someone's feelings is slightly better than ruining your celebratory getaway.

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One of the youngest women in the UK to have terminal stage four breast cancer has spoken candidly about her wishes to buy the horse of her dreams and get married in a castle "like a fairy tale princess."

Told in March that the breast cancer she was first diagnosed with in 2016 had returned and was now terminal, having spread to her spine, Vicki Turner, 24, of Kings Langley, Hertfordshire, had just one question: "Am I going to die?"


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Shockingly, one of only 31 people under 24 to be diagnosed with breast cancer each year in the UK – accounting for just 0.056 per cent of the 55,000 annual cases across all age groups, according to Cancer Research – Vicki said doctors told her she could survive for anything from three to 30 years.

Facing an uncertain future, rather than cracking under the pressure, the HR auditor, who has had a double mastectomy, set-up a GoFundMe page, which has already smashed the £10,000 target she set to buy and keep a horse, saying: "Horses have always been my therapy.

"I want a male gelding, maybe a warmblood Hanoverian. I'm going to get him settled at the stable, groom him and give him lots of carrots, and then start having lessons and work towards taking him out.


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"The diagnosis drives me to do things more rapidly. That's why I started my horse fund in March, just after my latest surgery."


She continued: "It's already raised £11,000, which is totally amazing. It makes me feel like I'm being hugged 1,000 times by 1,000 people. It's unbelievable. I truly never expected it to get this far."

But Vicki, whose dream is to marry her compliance engineer fiancé Simon Eastaugh, 25, in 2020 in the magnificent Leeds Castle near Maidstone, Kent, is no stranger to adversity.

She was just three-years-old when she was diagnosed with a Wilms' tumor, a type of kidney cancer, affecting about 70 children under the age of five each year in the UK with a 90 per cent survival rate, according to the NHS.

In September 1998 Vicki had a stage three tumor "the size of a grapefruit" removed along with her right kidney, followed by 19 rounds of radiotherapy, 17 rounds of chemotherapy and 15 blood transfusions over the course of a year.


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Left bald and with a weakened heart, she recalled: "At primary school I was bald as an egg. The kids in my year looked after me, but I remember getting called a boy a lot by older kids, which at that age isn't very fun."

Vicki, whose brother Ali, 21, is a car salesman, had no further dramatic health problems – apart from having her appendix removed at 14 – until she reached 19, when she was put on blood thinners for a cerebral venous sinus thrombosis.

This is a blood clot in the dural venous sinuses, which drain blood from the brain, and was diagnosed following a week of severe migraines.

She said: "I was taking the contraceptive pill at the time, which doctors thought might have caused it."


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"A nurse said to me that I have been unlucky, but I think I've been extremely lucky. I could have died when I had my first cancer, I could have had a stroke when I had my blood clot, but I didn't."

One of the mainstays of Vicki's childhood, through good times and bad, was her love of horses.

She had riding lessons from the age of eight, developing a talent for dressage and winning several competitions as a teenager on a horse called Toby that she rented with a friend.

Then, turning 21 in January 2016, it looked set to be the best year of her life, with her meeting her fiancé in the unlikely setting of her nail technician mum Helen's 'H-themed' fancy dress party, for her 50th birthday, at Hertfordshire's Chipperfield Cricket Club.

Recalling how she was dressed as a Hell's Angel at the 23 July bash, Vicki said: "He plays cricket for that team and was still there with some of his mates getting a bit p****d when we arrived, so they joined the party, although not in fancy dress.

"My mum went over, dressed as Helen of Troy, and interrogated him, asking why he hadn't met me. It was so funny!
"I couldn't have met anyone more perfect for me. He's so positive and he just lifts me up and makes everything fine."

Life was great for the couple until November 2016 when Vicki found a lump in her left breast.


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She continued: "We were getting ready to go out and I'd just had a shower and I remember watching a video that advised women to check our breasts in the shower.


"When I felt mine, I found a lump. I showed Simon and he told me to talk to my mum, which I did."

When Vicki saw her GP she was given an emergency referral to the St Albans City Hospital breast clinic for a biopsy and mammogram.


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A few days later on 17 November she was called back to St Albans and given the devastating news that she had Grade 3 breast cancer.


She recalled: "Mum was with me and while I was totally shocked, I think she'd had her suspicions."

She continued: "Still, we both just cried and cried and cried."

On 8 December 2016 she had a double mastectomy, to stop the cancer from spreading to the other breast – a procedure that is only performed on 50 women under 30 a year in the UK, according to the NHS – and reconstructive surgery.

After her operation at north west London's Royal Free Hospital, Vicki – who has no family history of breast cancer – also had six rounds of chemotherapy and was given hormone repression treatment, to "kill anything floating around."

Speaking about her treatment, she said: "Every time I get taken down to surgery I cry.

"I've been having operations since childhood but I never get used to them. I can't quite get the hang of being brave when it comes to going into surgery.

"But the most difficult ordeal was the chemotherapy. It's the hardest thing that I have ever had to endure. You lose your hair and your confidence."

She continued: "I lost the ability to physically do what I wanted. I got tired going up the stairs and while it saves lives it's a massively destructive path to go down in order to save your life."


Before starting her six-month course of chemotherapy in January 2017, Vicki tried, unsuccessfully to harvest her eggs, with a view to having children in the future.


Collect/PA Real Life

She explained: "Initially there was potential for four eggs and then it gradually went down to one and it was a phantom egg. So that's kaput for my eggs."

She added: "To be fair, I was first told this was likely when I was 12, so, for years I have been pondering the other options, like adoption or egg donation."

With her chemo finally over at the end of June, 2017, Vicki started looking to the future. Her hair grew back and she and Simon went traveling.

Vicki said: "We travelled around South East Asia from February to June 2018, going to Thailand, Laos, Cambodia and a bit of Western Australia, which was wonderful."

She continued: "Then we worked for a few months and went around Europe from August to October, before going skiing with my family in Bulgaria over New Year."


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But then during a routine checkup on 20 February 2019 her breast doctor found another lump where the cancer had been before on her left breast and said that looked like scar tissue.

Vicki said: "It grew between the skin and the silicon and saline implant, so I could feel it below the nipple."

Doctors acted quickly and on 25 February Vicki had a biopsy which, on 6 March led to catastrophic news.

She said: "A nurse asked me to come in to the hospital and I thought 'I don't like this'. I asked why and made them tell me on the phone. Something in me wanted to hear it and my first question was 'Am I going to die?'

"I think my breast care nurse just said something to console me."

She continued: "I just didn't think it was my turn to go through it all again. I had thought that it might come back but not until I was 30 or later."

As Vicki and her family prepared for yet another battle, Simon took a step towards making one of her dreams a reality.

She said: "Simon proposed on 19 March. I'm a massive Anne Boleyn fan and he proposed in the chapel of the Tower of London where her body was buried."

But, a day later on 20 March, at a scheduled appointment following a routine CT scan at Watford General Hospital, Vicki was horrified to be told doctors had seen "a speck" on two of her spinal vertebrae.


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They explained that her breast cancer was now stage four, it had spread and she also had spinal tumors that were inoperable.
Vicki remembers seeing her builder dad, Dave, 55, cry for the first time, when they told him and her brother what had happened.

She said: "I'd never seen Dad cry before, but we're very close and normally pretty good at receiving bad news, so it was a shock."

Giving her anywhere between three and 30 years to live, they said they could not be more precise until they see the results of an MRI scan on 10 April, which she is expecting any day, due to the aggressive nature of breast cancer in young people.

Still, Vicki, who is also waiting for a new treatment plan, went ahead with a lumpectomy on 28 March at St Albans to remove her breast tumor below the nipple on her left breast.

She said: "I'm terrified of what my medical team will say next, to be honest. I said to my oncologist I thought everything would go back to normal but it didn't.

"This cancer will never be out of me now. There's nothing I can do. I eat healthily, I don't smoke, there's literally no reason for me to have been dealt this card."

"I'm most scared of not being around to watch my family grow old."

She added: "And I want to get married and have children, or even see my friends and brother have children and get married. I'd like to look after my parents when they get old too."

But, despite her fears, Vicki – who returned to work a week after her lumpectomy – is still determined to give herself incentives to carry on, the most important of which will be to buy a horse of her own.

She continued: "Being with horses is my escape from the anxiety, fear and sadness of the cancer that lives in me and how it's going to affect my life."

She said: "I even have list of horse names, that's how sad I am! Simon told me to call it Lord Elrond and I thought of Thor, so that's the short list at the moment.

"My dream is becoming a reality and I said to myself 'You can have your dream horse' and it takes away the fear."
To donate to Vicki's horse fund at www.gofundme.com/vick039s-wish


The company behind the Assassin’s Creed video games has pledged 500,000 euros (around $564,900 USD) to help restore Notre Dame Cathedral.

French publisher Ubisoft featured a painstaking recreation of the landmark in its 2014 game Assassin’s Creed Unity, which is set in Paris during the French Revolution.

Now, after fire ripped through the 850-year-old building earlier this week, the company is vowing to help with its reconstruction.

“As the smoke clears on the events that unfolded on Monday at the Notre Dame de Paris, we stand in solidarity with our fellow Parisians and everyone around the world moved by the devastation the fire caused," Ubisoft said in a statement. "Notre Dame is an integral part of Paris, a city to which we are deeply connected. Seeing the monument in peril like this affected us all. In light of Monday’s events, we will be donating €500k to help with the restoration and reconstruction of the cathedral. We encourage all of you who are interested to donate as well.”

Ubisoft dedicated 14 months of production time – a total of 5,000 hours of work – to recreating the cathedral for Unity.

The interior of Notre-Dame Cathedral in Assassin's Creed Unity

PA Viral

Game players are able to climb up the outside of the building and explore the intricate detail of the interior.

Such is the realism of the rendering there has been speculation the research and analysis could help with the upcoming restoration efforts, though a spokesperson for Ubisoft said the company was “not currently involved”.

“It is important to keep in mind that what we did for the game was not a scientific reconstruction but rather an artistic vision,” the spokesperson said. “While we wanted to be very precise with details, there are some differences in terms of scale and with some elements. That being said, we would be more than happy to lend our expertise in any way that we can to help with these efforts.”


Notre-Dame Cathedral in Assassin's Creed Unity

PA Viral

Unity will be available for free to PC users for the next week in a move Ubisoft says will “give everyone the chance to experience the majesty and beauty of Notre Dame”.

“Video games can enable us to explore places in ways we never could have otherwise imagined,” Ubisoft said. “We hope, with this small gesture, we can provide everyone an opportunity to appreciate our virtual homage to this monumental piece of architecture.”

Also contributing to the efforts to restore the cathedral was Disney, who produced an animated version of Victor Hugo’s The Hunchback Of Notre Dame in 1996. They announced a five million US dollars contribution.

“The Walt Disney Company stands with our friends and neighbours in the community, offering our heartfelt support as well as a five million US dollars donation for the restoration of this irreplaceable masterpiece,” Disney chairman Robert A Iger said.

VCG/VCG via Getty Images

Chinese state media reported the last known female Yangtze giant soft-shell turtle has died.

She was estimated to be over 90 years old.

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PA REAL LIFE

TW: Eating Disorder and triggering images.

Breanna Cornell enjoys being suspended by her skin from metal hooks and running 100 mile ultra-marathons, has spoken of the "immense sense of joy and feeling of achievement" provided by her hobbies. Which have helped her combat anorexia and body dysmorphia.

Cornell said both activities involved pushing her body to the limit and, while having sharp objects threaded into her skin was initially uncomfortable, the fear and excitement was also thrilling.


Cornell lives in Coconino County, Arizona – where suspension is illegal, since it is not considered a medical procedure unless it is carried out by a doctor. Nevertheless, Cornell has taken part in the practice 12 times, since being introduced to it by her then boyfriend, two-and-a-half years ago.


"There is certainly a connection for me between long-distance running and suspending that accounts for why I enjoy them both so much," she said. "There is that feeling of fear and adrenaline at the start that then becomes an almost calm-like meditation once you get going, and then the overwhelming feeling of achievement at the end."


Despite the inevitable pain experienced by hook suspension, Cornell insists she is not a masochist, seeing the pastime more as an artistic and emotional expression, while admitting that she does enjoy challenging her body.


PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

Hook suspension has been practiced by Native Americans for hundreds of years.


"I wouldn't say that I derive my pleasure in suspending – or marathon running for that matter – from the pain, but I would certainly say that I like being able to push my body to its limits, which does involve some amount of pain," Cornell said. "For thousands of years, humans have endured pain as part of daily life, but in the modern world we have been able to live pain free. This seems to me to make us lacking at a genetic level as pain is an essential element of human existence and I, for one, couldn't do without it."



PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

A long-distance runner since childhood, Cornell completed her first marathon just after leaving school in 2010, but soon set her sights on greater goals than 26.2 miles and in 2012 was competing in ultra-marathons in Africa.


Around the same time she developed a penchant for body modification, having her first tattoo, a wing on her foot, aged 18, followed by a series of piercings on her ears and nose.


"Growing up, I had had a lot of problems with anorexia and body dysmorphia, where you have a very negative perception of your body," Cornell added. "I liked getting piercings and tattoos of drawings that I had made, because it allowed me to look at my body and focus on them instead of the way I looked."



PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

At this point hook suspending was not yet on her radar, although she was aware of it, but viewed it as "gory and unpleasant."
That changed in April 2016 when she joined her then boyfriend, a suspension enthusiast, at an event.


Watching him being strung up by a professional piercing artist at a studio in Phoenix, Arizona – where suspension is legal – she was fascinated.


PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell


"Up until that point, I didn't think it was for me at all. It looked very scary and frankly quite gory," she explained. "But then, as soon as I saw it for myself, I knew immediately that this was something I wanted to do."


She would have to wait another six months, however, before she could be hooked up herself. But in October 2016, she arranged a session with the same piercing artist in Phoenix, costing $100.



PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

"I was really, really nervous beforehand and was sick twice because there was so much adrenaline pumping through me," she said. "I was put in the 'suicide' position, so called because it looks like a person hanging as the hooks are through the skin at the top of your back, and there was a lot of fear to overcome, as I lifted my final toe off the ground, as it feels so unnatural. But once I was up there, suspended five feet off the ground, I had a rush of immense joy and it felt as though I was weightless and floating."



PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

Staying suspended for half an hour, Cornell knew as soon as she was eventually let down that she would have to do it again – she was, literally, hooked. So, six months later, she returned – this time being rigged up in a 'superman' position, flying forwards with 10 hooks along her back and legs.


Having now been suspended 12 times, or roughly every six months, Cornell says her hobby provides her with an outlet for her emotions.


PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

"My response to each suspension really varies on my mood. If I am happy then I will have a lot of fun and swing around a bit," she explained, adding that she also chooses her position according to her mood. "But if I am feeling a bit stressed then it can be really nice to get into a more static position like the hammock – where you are sitting into the suspension with your knees and shoulders hooked. That way, I can sit comfortably for hours and just relax."


Despite its long history and growing popularity around the world, hook suspension is not without its detractors, some of whom Cornell has encountered.


PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell

"I realize that not everyone will understand the appeal. One person I know said it was 'appalling.' But that's why I often try to compare it with marathon running – a much less maligned pastime," she said. "There is just as much pain involved in running long distances, but you don't necessarily do it for that reason – you do it for the satisfaction of having pushed your body. And that, for me, is one of life's greatest joys."



PA REAL LIFE - Breanna Cornell